Your Best Life Now

Your Best Life Now

Why Are Some Christians So Angry and Hateful Toward Gays?

Below is my response to Sandy Rios, the talk show host of the American Family Association, for her recently publicized remarks that “God will even the score” against Obama and gays soon enough.

I wrote the following response in an attempt to address why there is so much anger and hatred among fundamentalist Christians and Christian leaders toward the gay community. She just happens to be the perfect case study in this sad commentary on bigotry and hatred and fear so prevalent among many Christians and in many churches.

Here’s what I wrote (if you’d like to read an article related to what she said, click on the link below):


Let’s be real clear about this, Sandy Rios. What you are saying is not said “with humility and with fear” as you claim. No, this IS the delusion under which you are living and, coincidentally, I lived, too, for much of my Christian life. I am so grateful, however, to be free of such inner turmoil. Hopefully, the day will come when you tire of it, too.

Latent anger and hatred, as in your case toward Obama, gays, and, if you knew me, most likely toward me, too, is just that – anger and hatred. Not only do you live with this, but you project it onto God, too. This is delusional in at least two ways:


1. You assume that God feels about gays and “liberals” just as you do. What you do not know, however, is that it is you alone who hates gays and is afraid of them. It is not God who hates them or is afraid of them. Your error is that you are unaware of your error. In fact, I am sure you would vigorously defend yourself by saying, “Oh but I love the sinner; it is the sin I hate.” Really? I want to give you more credit than that. Surely you are smart enough to avoid succumbing to that level of self-delusion? It is my hope that one day you will see your own misperception of consciousness.

There is a second way that projecting onto God what is your own dysfunction is regrettable.

2. You dismiss your rage toward Obama, gays, and I’m sure others, too, by living out that rage via an imagined future punishment you are certain will come one day.  You assume God will pour out his wrath on those you feel are sinners so you are able to cope with delayed gratification today because you imagine savoring it tomorrow.


I am no psychiatrist but I would guess that’s got to be akin to a mental psychosis. Just my uneducated guess but it seems a little frightening to me to think I would carry in my heart such anger and rage and dull that pain with a kind of morbid projection of payback one day.

This is all so very unnecessary and certainly it is a repugnant understanding of God with which you live. Having said this, however, I realize you are incapable of seeing this. Otherwise, you would renounce it once-and-for-all. Nobody would knowingly live with such a spiritual dis-ease or borderline psychoses.

You remind me of those whom Jesus regarded as blind but who thought they could see. This, too, you cannot see precisely because the lens of your soul are clouded by hate and anger. You would likely say, “God will forgive Obama and the gays,” but I wish to declare to you, Sandy, the good news that forgiveness is available to you…today.  No need to live as you are living.


Unconsciousness is the culprit in all our failures, as well as all repugnant, judgmental behavior. I think this was one of the points Maya Angelou was making, when she said, “When you know better, you do better.” This is true for almost everyone. It is what precipitated Jesus’ comment from the cross, “Father forgive them, they do not know…”

When I speak of consciousness, this is that to which I refer. KNOWING-NESS. For me, salvation is “the transformation of the mind” as Saint Paul put it in Romans 12:1-2. It is a new way of thinking. It is a kind of expanded consciousness…enlarged awareness.  It is a new way of thinking.

I really feel, Sandy, you cannot know what you are saying or doing. Nor are you apparently aware of just how hurtful your words are. The irony in all of this is that you probably feel better about yourself for holding on to your anger, fear, and hatred and projecting it onto God, too, so you don’t feel the demonic nature of such internal attitudes. You likely complicate things by telling yourself over and over that you alone are the persecuted souls of the world because you alone stand for a “truth” you mistakenly but actually think is the truth.


If it were even possible, I would hope you would know this one thing: Instead of your words lifting you up, as you likely feel they have done, you have really only successfully dragged God down into the pit of projected hate and anger where you live.

But then, I suppose you cannot see that. Or, can you?
@DrSteveMcSwain #DrSteveMcSwain

  • Stephen “Steve” Sponsler

    Uh..look who’s talking. This reply was far more hateful than his reply to this person the post refers to – it is a sad state that people don’t understand what they are reading in the contextual setting to which it applied and the situations under which Jesus was speaking and to whom he was speaking. Any references to hell were toward hypocrites who made life perfectly miserable for others as they held position of leadership and assumed a godly authority over people they didn’t have fact, you seem to have the same attitude those men had. If you Knew Christ you’d know that He is not a religion as so many have been led to believe. Might want to back peddle a little bit . ..and get educated a little bit..what a very very very sick answer this was…get help.

  • Stephen “Steve” Sponsler

    To be clear, you never were a Christian, so just as well. One does not ‘decide’ to not be a who is a Christian is one who has received the Life-Given Spirit of Eternal Nature of the Ascended LORD of LORDS…deciding ‘not to be a Christian’ is like a bird deciding not to be a bird any more. I don’t know what so called ‘graduation’ you came from but it coudn’t have been much of one if what you learned about Christ comes from misinformed notions of Leviticus – how said if so – how sad if not given an education supposedly. On the other hand, I don’t really like his answer either. Note he claims to be a ‘Life-Coach”? Bunch of quacks..the whole lot.

  • Tanya Simmonds

    As much as I would like to be in support of your sentiments, Dr. McSwain, I tend to agree with Aquaria here. As a former Christian myself, a graduate of theology college, and now an impassioned atheist, my conversion to disbelief came not from Christians or the fundamentalist right – but from the scriptures themselves. Leviticus prescribes bludgeoning homosexuals to death with rocks, whereas Paul endorsed the idea of casting them into everlasting fire.

    Of course, damnation was also promised as the penalty for everything else – right down to involuntary feelings of heterosexual attraction (Matt :5:28.) Historical context, and the recognition of ancient Jewish human ownership rights cross-referenced with Exodus 20:17 aside; this is still the divine imposition of thought crime – the most totalitarian concept known to man. Unfortunately, this, along with legislation against mere anger, and it being equated with murder (Matt:5:22) is often overlooked by Christians, who avidly ignore all other tenets in deference to the condemnation of homosexuality alone.

    The Bible is a library that specifically states that this God called for slavery, torture, genocide, infanticide, the rape of innocent virgins as the spoils of war, the rape of innocent concubines as a punishment to their master, dashing infants against rocks, cutting open expectant mothers and tearing the unborn from their wombs, human sacrifice, cruelty to animals, and the eternal torture of any who dare to disagree. The policy of punishing innocents for the crimes of the guilty literally permeates its pages from beginning to end. Where, therein, can we find justification for calling to a monster, who is so far beneath us morally – for ‘forgiveness’? Forgiveness for what? The involuntary characteristics a person is born with by virtue of a throw of the genetic dice? What, really, is there to ‘forgive’ in a person on the grounds of his or her sexual orientation? Because that’s what you personally suggested in your article.

    I am happy to discuss these issues with you in a civilized discourse if you should so desire.

    Kind regards


  • Aquaria

    I commend you for being a better person than this Rios dirtbag; however, this woman is expressing exactly what the genocidal manual you follow actually says.

    She’s right that her religion believes in eternal torture, someday. She didn’t just make it up out of thin air or because she’s so overcome with her private hatreds. She’s not smart enough to come up with the idea on her own.

    So where did she get that idea? FROM YOUR RELIGION. Heck, she got it right from the horse’s mouth, as in directly from the main character of the New Testament. The “meek and mild” jaysus talks about torturing people forever more than any other subject. And he enjoys it. It’s only the most evil idea ever vomited into the world, and he reveled in it.

    Don’t even try to tapdance around it. You know it’s there, and I’m not letting you lie that it isn’t.

    I don’t care that it makes you uncomfortable that we make you face what your hate manual actually says. It’s uncomfortable to you because it’s evil filth, and you can’t reconcile it with the supposed do-gooder hippie deity you’ve painted that hatemonger to be. Worse, you cling to that delusion despite knowing that your genocidal hate manual does countenance the idea.

    It’s exceedingly dishonest of you to throw rocks at Rios, when you follow the same zombie scumbag who promised eternal torture to everyone who didn’t agree with him. And did it a lot. You cannot change that fact, much as you try. Rios is at least smart enough to understand what she’s signed up for. She hasn’t lied to herself about it, unlike you.

    You should be ashamed of yourself for being so dishonest and hypocritical.

  • Alan

    Not all Christians are this ignorant. In fact, I grew up in a Baptist family, and I’m gay. My family are all very loving people who would do anything for me and support me. Perhaps Sandy Rios has never been around gay people. *Fear* being the key word here. *Hatred* not so much. If I thought every Christian I met *hated* me for being gay I’d be just as miserable as Sandy Rios is….

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