Beliefnet
The Queen of My Self

Every Woman Is The Queen of Her Own Heart

By Shiloh Sophia McCloud


Every woman is the Queen of her own heart.

She must decide how to govern her own domain.

She seeks friends and allies that honor

who she is now

and who she is becoming.

She has the power to create miracles.

Her prayers and intentions manifest in right order.

 

She does not know how

or when her needs will be met,

but she trusts the will of the Divine.

Being the Queen of one’s domain is not about being

the ruler over anyone else’s life or ideas.

And it isn’t even about calling herself a Queen.

It is about self honor. It is about choice.

It is about knowing her limits

and setting her boundaries.

And about encouraging others

to live their possibilities.

It is about learning how to live

with what comes her way,

with as much grace,

majesty and justice as she can.

 

And sometimes, yes, she has to have her own way!

She claims her unique destiny and recognizes

she has a calling.

A calling to greatness within her own life.

And within her own heart.

 

The Queen of Her Own Heart isn’t something she does,

it is a way that she is.

When she if full, bountiful

and living from the overflow

she invites others to join her there –

in the middle of her awakened sacred heart.

She encourages others to love powerfully – unconditionally –

while at the same time practicing discernment

and wisdom.

 

She is forgiving. And she believes healing is at hand.

She leads her own life as grand experiment

in happiness, in creativity, and in abundance.

She offers her gifts to others,

but not to her own detriment.

She rests as she needs to,

ruling one’s own life takes energy.

She chooses to embody wholeness, her sovereign essence,

even when she feels fragmented

by all there is to do, and be.

 

She holds the prayers of the world within her

because she cares what happens – with everyone –

even though she cannot reach them all.

She reaches whom she can.

She often feels like she is not pulling it all off,

and sometimes she isn’t.

But she keeps reaching anyway.

She keeps opening her heart

and being in her own power.

She chooses to govern her life in gratitude.

*****

Donna Henes is the author of The Queen of My Self: Stepping into Sovereignty in Midlife. She offers counseling and upbeat, practical and ceremonial guidance for individual women and groups who want to enjoy the fruits of an enriching, influential, purposeful, passionate, and powerful maturity. Consult the MIDLIFE MIDWIFE™

The Queen welcomes questions concerning all issues of interest to women in their mature years. Send your inquiries to thequeenofmyself@aol.com.

 

 

 

QUEEN REGNANT

PRONUNCIATION:

(kween REG-nuhnt)

MEANING:

noun: A queen reigning in her own right, as opposed to one having a royal title by marriage. Also known as queen regent.

ETYMOLOGY:

From Latin regnare (reign). Ultimately from the Indo-European root reg- (to move in a straight line, to lead or rule) that is also the source of regime, direct, rectangle, erect, rectum, alert, source, and surge.

The wife of a ruling king is known as a Queen Consort. The husband of a queen regnant would be a king consort, though usually he is called a prince.

A queen ruling during the youth, disability, or absence of a monarch is known as a Queen Regent.

Queen Regnants are we. We are the Queens of Our Selves. Self-knowing, Self-determining, Self-empowered, Self-ruling, Self-satisfied, Self- loving.

 

 My command stands firm like the mountains and

the sun disk shines and spreads rays over the

titulary of my august person, and my falcon rises

high above the kingly banner unto all eternity.

 

       -Hatshepsut, Egyptian Queen/Pharaoh

       1503-1482 BC

*****

Donna Henes is the author of The Queen of My Self: Stepping into Sovereignty in Midlife. She offers counseling and upbeat, practical and ceremonial guidance for individual women and groups who want to enjoy the fruits of an enriching, influential, purposeful, passionate, and powerful maturity. Consult the MIDLIFE MIDWIFE™

The Queen welcomes questions concerning all issues of interest to women in their mature years. Send your inquiries to thequeenofmyself@aol.com.

 

 

 

A life-long lover of the moon, I live in a constant state of lunar awareness and I attend to the process of my life and living in conscious accordance with the cycle of its four phases. It has long troubled me that so many Triple Goddess models leave out one element, direction, season, or moon phase entirely, and I yearned for the full range of inspiration that can only be offered by an all-encompassing Goddess of Four Quarters.

I searched and researched for Four-Fold Goddess and found that though not common, even fairly rare, there have been a few Goddesses over time who have embodied four phases of being.

Anat or Anata, was the Great Goddess of the ancient Levant, the area now occupied by Israel, Transjordan and Syria. She had four separate aspects: Warrior, Mother, Virgin and Wanton.

Terrible as a war deity, she was regarded as a just and benevolent goddess of beauty, sexuality, and of the fertility of crops, animals, and men. Her grace and beauty were considered epitome of perfection.

Although she is regarded as the mother of gods, she is most commonly referred to as Virgin or Maiden. She is sometimes called Wanton, in reference to her putative lust for sexual intercourse and the bloodshed of war. Her other names include Mother of all Nations, Virgin Mistress of the Gods, Wet Nurse, Lady, Strength of Life, Anat the Destroyer and Lady of the Mountain.

Isis, the Egyptian Mistress of the Four Elements, stands at the center of all existence where Her quadruple energies project through space and time to intersect at that precise point where life is created. Robert Graves’s Triple Goddess is associated only with the three elements of earth, air, and water, the three seasons of spring, summer, and winter, and just three phases of the moon — waxing, full, and dark. But Isis ruled all of the forces of nature, including fire, fall, and the waning moon. The Four-Fold Goddess of Eternal Return is the turning of the wheel of life, and She is also the road beneath the wheel.

I am all that

Is, was or

Ever will be.

-Words of Isis inscribed on the Temple at Sais, Egypt

The Old Religion of tribal Italy also featured an all-encompassing four-aspected lunar goddess called Tana. As the new moon, She was Diana, the virginal Maiden Goddess, adventurous and daring. As the full moon, She was the Great Round Mother Losna. As the waning moon, She was Manea, the Goddess of the Night Spirits and the departing souls. And as the dark moon She was Umbrea, Goddess of the Underworld, keeper of shadows and secrets and all things hidden.

The Aztecs worshipped a four-part moon goddess as well, called Tlazolteotl, also known as Ixcuina. When the moon was new and waxing, She appeared as a young, brilliant, enticing maiden who was perhaps a bit cruel. When the moon was full, She became a sensuous young woman who loved excitement and lusty pleasures. The waning moon brought Her priestess aspect to the fore. This was Her time to forgive transgressions and bestow blessings of fertility and bounty. As the old dark moon, She was a monster who stole fortunes and ruined lovers.

Hecate, honored as the Greek Triple Goddess, was also called Hecate of the Crossroads, for Her role as the divine crossing guard, leading the newly departed souls across the boundary that separates life from death. A crossroad indicates two intersecting paths creating four corners, four quarters. Although Hecate, who is associated with the moon, is usually depicted as three-faced: one face looking straight ahead, full front, flanked by two faces in profile, each facing outward. But we can easily imagine Her fourth face looking backward, and thus rendered invisible by the other three — just like the dark fourth phase of the moon when it hides its face from us.

We know the moon has four phases. They are called quarters, after all. So it stands to reason that any self-respecting Moon Goddess must represent the moon in the completeness of its cycle, just as She must stand for us in ours.

*****

Donna Henes is the author of The Queen of My Self: Stepping into Sovereignty in Midlife. She offers counseling and upbeat, practical and ceremonial guidance for individual women and groups who want to enjoy the fruits of an enriching, influential, purposeful, passionate, and powerful maturity. Consult the MIDLIFE MIDWIFE™

The Queen welcomes questions concerning all issues of interest to women in their mature years. Send your inquiries to thequeenofmyself@aol.com.

 

 

 

 

 

Contrary to the assumptions of many women, the Triple Goddess model is not universal, nor is it really historical. In fact, the so-called ancient paradigm that enjoys so much popularity today is actually not quite as old as I am!

The age-related Triple Goddess was first articulated in so many words by Robert Graves, a classical scholar, mythographer and poet who in his 1948 study, The White Goddess, synthesized the nine most important early Greeks goddesses into three main types.

“As Goddess of the Underworld,” he writes, “she was concerned with Birth, Procreation and Death. As Goddess of the Earth she was concerned with the three seasons of Spring, Summer and Winter: she animated trees and plants and ruled all living creatures. As Goddess of the Sky she was the Moon in her three phases.”

Summing up the paradigm, he concludes, “As the New Moon or Spring, she was girl; as the Full Moon or Summer, she was woman; as the Old Moon or Winter, she was hag.”

Robert Graves’s Triple Goddess is associated only with the three elements of earth, air, and water, the three seasons of spring, summer, and winter, and just three phases of the moon — waxing, full, and dark.

Now wait a minute! Where is autumn? The leaves don’t just get crumbly and brown and fall off the trees at the end of summer. First they turn brilliant colors, a fabulous display of gorgeous glory before they disappear into winter. Does that not describe midlife women, who are more stunning and sturdy now than ever we were as young maidens?

And what about the waning moon? Where is that, Mr. Graves? While it might be tempting to think of the waning moon as getting smaller, weaker, dimmer, I prefer to relate to the waning stage as reducing, refining, condensing, like fine wine or rich broth. Less water and more juice.

He also compares the Maiden with air, the Mother with Earth and the Crone with water. Fire, any one? If women in our mid years are not about fire, we are not about anything. Our bodies are burning up alive. Our passions are rekindled. And our patience is fried. To a crisp!

During the past half century, Graves’s definition of three age-identified aspects of a Triple Goddess has worked its way thoroughly into today’s huge and diverse Goddess and New Age movements where it has been wholeheartedly embraced. But now there is an alternative — a Four- Fold Goddess whose four periods of growth and transformation resonate deeply with contemporary women.

Four, not the trinity, is considered the holy number in most Earth-honoring cultures. In numerology, four represents the generating virtue, the source from which all combinations are possible. It has long been a number of completion, stability and solidity, considered a perfect number, the root of all things.

My new construct of the four stages of a woman’s life — Maiden, Mother, Queen and Crone is a much more accurate description of the current Way of Womanhood. And they seem so natural, somehow. They are in complete metaphoric alignment with the pervasive way that peoples have always ordered existence into Four Quarters. The four quarters of the moon, the four seasons of the year, the four solstices and equinoxes, the four elements, the four cardinal directions of the Earth, the four periods of the day, the four suits of the tarot. When all four aspects are joined, the Goddess is complete: physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. And so are we.

Four-Fold Correspondences

Maiden                  Mother            Queen                  Crone

Waxing Moon         Full Moon          Waning Moon        Dark moon

Spring                        Summer              Autumn                Winter

Water                          Earth                   Fire                        Air

East                             South                  West                     North

Dawn                         Noon                     Sunset                Midnight

*****

Donna Henes is the author of The Queen of My Self: Stepping into Sovereignty in Midlife. She offers counseling and upbeat, practical and ceremonial guidance for individual women and groups who want to enjoy the fruits of an enriching, influential, purposeful, passionate, and powerful maturity. Consult the MIDLIFE MIDWIFE™

The Queen welcomes questions concerning all issues of interest to women in their mature years. Send your inquiries to thequeenofmyself@aol.com.