The Queen of My Self

The Queen’s Court is a gathering of sovereign women of a certain age — our dear peers — who graciously offer information, guidance, inspiration and encouragement to each other.

We Queens know what we know. And we know a great deal. Our experience has made us wise. So, feel free to consult with our cybercounsel when you are need of sage advice or wish to explore a particular topic of interest.

Who knows what can come out of these sister alliances we are building?

Dear Queen Mama Donna,

I’ve been reading your book, The Queen of My Self. I LOVE IT!!! I am in a Womyn’s Circle called The WildWomyn. Most of us are approaching 50. We gather twice a month, usually every other Tuesday. Each hostess selects the topic of discussion, activities, and of course we share a meal. We usually pick a couple of books a year to study and discuss.

We practice old ways: we are creative, imaginative, daring. We stir pots, look into mirrors, anoint ourselves, sing and dance. We learn new things and share our wisdom. We investigate the divine feminine, herbs, elements, plants, animals and use all kinds of tools to help us. We pay attention to the moon phases: making new moon intentions and full moon water. In March every year, we celebrate Gather The Women. Last year, we each selected a Goddess whose energy we wanted to bring into our lives, and we made masks of them.

I would love to incorporate the teachings of The Queen of My Self into our circle and suggest it as the theme for this year’s Gather the Women celebration. Do you have any suggestions for activities, study, discussion, or anything else? In the past, we’ve found that some women are reluctant to speak and/or give their opinion. I’ve never been in a book club and was wondering if there is any companion workbook or something to assist in promoting discussion? Sincerely,
– Joanne, MI

Dear Queen Joanne,

I think I can speak for the Queen, who is undoubtedly delighted and honored that you would dedicate your group to exploring and celebrating Her Majesty’s empowered energy. As it happens, I have been working on a discussion and ritual guide to accompany The Queen of My Self. I just haven’t been working on it hard enough or fast enough. So I welcome your request as a friendly nudge to get on with it! I promise to make this a priority. In the meantime, it occurs to me that this is a question for the Queens Court. I know for a fact that there are quite a few similar Queen groups out there in several countries. I invite them to share their experiences and suggestions, Queen to Queen. Thanks for your patience with my procrastination. Gotta go write now!


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Donna Henes is the author of The Queen of My Self: Stepping into Sovereignty in Midlife. She offers counseling and upbeat, practical and ceremonial guidance for individual women and groups who want to enjoy the fruits of an enriching, influential, purposeful, passionate, and powerful maturity. Consult the MIDLIFE MIDWIFE™

The Queen welcomes questions concerning all issues of interest to women in their mature years. Send your inquiries to



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