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The Queen of My Self

For the rest of the week, I will continue posting stories of and by women who stand firm in their sense of Self-worth.

If you are such a woman, comfortable in your power, please tell me your story. And many thanks to those of you who answered the call.

A Woman Recognizes Potential in Herself

By Kristin Ward, NY
 
Every second gives us a new opportunity to be better, so I — a single, home-schooling, graphic-designer mother of three — decided to try to do better for myself in a big way.

I became tired of being mousy-brown and invisible. I became tired of having low expectations for myself and the people around me. I became tired of living my life in a constant state of fear. We all have this amazing potential. What if we try to reach toward that?

So earlier this fall, I began seeking my inner queen. I gave away old clothes in an attempt to find a new look that would express my womanhood and majesty.

I bought a new wardrobe. I’m on a tight budget, so I shopped at used-clothing stores and now wear mostly formal vintage dresses.

What we choose to wear expresses how we feel about ourselves. I want to feel feminine. Instead of wearing baggy jeans that never fit me properly and make me feel blah, I want to wear things that fit me perfectly and make me feel beautiful and powerful.

What has been strange is the attention coming my way, when I’m dropping my kids off at the YMCA or shopping at Wegman’s.

When people see me walking around formally dressed, they often stop and ask me where I’m going, or they just smile and say hello — a big difference from when I was mousy-brown and invisible. They ask me why I’m so dressed up. I tell them that it’s an experiment I’m doing, in order to love myself and to raise my expectations. Some people get it, and others don’t.

I was inspired by the concept of majesty while walking my dog at a neighborhood playground. Lots of kids were playing. They were yelling and swearing at each other. I wondered where this came from. Then, I thought about what a difference it would make if their parents had higher expectations. What if parents envisioned themselves as kings or queens? How differently would they behave? How would they treat others? How would this affect the children?

We all have majesty within. We all have a perfect self inside that has been become encased with walls of fear, shame and hurt.

I’m not trying to re-create myself. I’m just trying to break down those walls so I can flourish without all the fear.

I don’t expect everyone to start dressing vintage. That would be ridiculous! My hope is that people can see that we all have the power to change our lives for the better.

We all have the ability to see the good in ourselves, and to strive to make great things happen, for ourselves and for others.

For the rest of the week, I will continue posting stories of and by women who stand firm in their sense of Self-worth.

If you are such a woman, comfortable in your power, please tell me your story. And many thanks to those of you who answered the call.

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The Queen welcomes questions concerning all issues of interest to women in their mature years. Send your inquiries to thequeenofmyself@aol.com.

CONSULT THE MIDLIFE MIDWIFE™
Queen Mama Donna offers upbeat, practical and ceremonial guidance for individual women and groups who want to enjoy the fruits of an enriching, influential, purposeful, passionate, and powerful maturity.

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