Beliefnet
The Queen of My Self

My synchronistic receptors have been extremely highly attuned lately. As soon as I think a thought, I am gifted with an affirmation of its veracity. No sooner than I think or write something, than some related, really relevant writing by a like-minded soul sister Queen is miraculously, electronically delivered to my computer.

Deena Metzger’s powerful two-part message “Ruin and Beauty” that I posted Monday and Tuesday was just such a gift. A gorgeous mirror reflection of my own grief about environmental devastation and my determined dedication to do something about it.

When I think about it, my greatest contribution to the greater good — beyond all the obvious easy steps we all take to renew, reuse repurpose and recycle — is to connect, to communicate, to commune, to encourage. This was my assignment from the universe. This is my way.

We each have our own way of serving. The severity of the times demands that we all step up and find our personal way and follow the path where it leads us. Inevitably, it leads us right to our own authentic center Self. This is where we belong. Where we were born to be.

As I was writing those words, the following piece by Jennifer Louden, the Comfort Queen, popped up onto my screen. It’s a wonderful affirmation of just what I had been thinking. I guess great minds, great Queens, really do think alike!

You Are Called
By Jennifer Louden

If you are here unfaithfully with us, you’re causing terrible damage.

Dear Rumi, he knows how to get to the heart of the matter, doesn’t he?

If you are here unfaithfully with us, you’re causing terrible damage.
What is Rumi talking about?

Near as I can tell, he’s talking about cheating on your calling. Denying it.

Near as I can tell, Rumi knew, that minx, that at some point, your calling was going to come calling to you.

Darling, that time is now.

It’s calling and calling loud.
Woo-hoo! I’m over here. C’mon over and let’s get it on.

It’s calling you, and me, and all of us, like never before.

Please, don’t cover your ears. I need your company on this adventure. We all need your company.

And if you do cover your ears, turn away, get busy elsewhere, know that it will keep calling you, keep following you, keep throwing hints – sometimes pointy jabby hints. It wants you that badly. It won’t quit. It wants you to see that all the self-care and soul searching and creative voice finding you’ve done, all the fear-busting, course-taking, yoga-bending, tribe-building, and general spiffying, is so beautiful and it’s all been preparation.

Holy preparation.

Preparing you to live faithfully and boldly in care of authentic selfhood.

Let me call upon Parker Palmer to help explain:

What we see is simple but often ignored: the movements that transform us, our relations, and our world, emerge from the lives of people who decide to care for their authentic selfhood… the people who plant the seeds of movements make a critical decision: they decide to live ‘divided no more.’

They decide no longer to act on the outside in a way that contradicts some truth about themselves that they hold deeply on the inside. They decide to clam authentic selfhood and act it out – and their decisions ripple out to transform the society in which they live, serving the selfhood of millions of others.

Some of us educated spiritual types may have gotten stuck thinking that claiming our authentic self was only about us, about our passions, our creative fulfillment, our bank accounts.

Oh darling, how adorable. I’m here to tell you: that was just step one!

Now comes step two and beyond. (To infinity and beyond…)

You are ready. As ready as you need to be. Promise.

(And if you think you don’t have the energy or the time here’s the secret: you get more than you give, in all ways, when you work faithfully for the true and undivided life.

You are called:

To see that which is untrue, unfair, false, restrictive, abhorrent, unjust, and otherwise un, that which your authentic self can no longer pretend is not there.

You are called to liberate, to hold, to love a very small part of that un, the part that most divides you from yourself, so that the places in you, and me, and all of us, that are also divided and shamed and shoved into corners because of that wrong, can be united.

Can be free.

This authentic self stuff is a deeply political and radically act.

Who knew?

Oh and least you think you are being called to be different than you are – say more good or noble or selfish – nope.

It’s the undivided and authentic writ large, expanded, which means being more you and doing the knitting together of savoring and saving in utter youness.

Good, right?

***
As if the coincidence of this piece wasn’t amazing enough, I just this minute received a message from a Queen reader commenting on Deena Metzger’s “Ruin and Beauty.” It is also, unbenounced to her, a comment on Jennifer Louden’s article, which she clearly had not read, since it hasn’t been posted yet. Talk about synchronicity!

Driving home from Carmel, California near where my son was married in
the woods this past weekend, I found myself overcome with the beauty of
the landscape–earth and sky thrown open, gorgeous yellow grasses
deepening to earth brown with the fading light. I could barely breathe
as the sweep of my life across 66 years undulated before me, within me.
A profound call, cry, longing to live the beauty and the sorrow sewn
into the many years of kinship and landscape I am. If I call out the
names of the rivers of my childhood – Rio Grande, Arkansas, Gunnison,
might I then know the exact passageway to crawl down to live?
Rio Grande! Arkansas! Gunnison! Colorado! 

– Sharon

***
The Queen welcomes questions concerning all issues of interest to women in their mature years. Send your inquiries to thequeenofmyself@aol.com.

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