The Queen of My Self

The Queen of My Self

The Queen Suggests A Mirror Meditation

Certainly the most crucial step toward sovereignty is to know our Selves. After all our years as mothers and others, we need to reestablish who we are as individuals, separate and distinct from our relationships with those around us. Who am I if I am not a mother, a daughter, a lover, a wife, a friend, a partner, a teacher, a student, a boss or an employee?

Who am I if I am not associated with some undertaking, enterprise, creation, project, product or service? Who am I, in fact, if I just am? As I live and breathe? And how do I feel about it?

For these answers and the answers to all of life’s questions, we must look into our own heart and allow ourselves to feel our feelings, to own and embrace them for the wisdom they convey. We can only discover our own truth by paying close attention to the promptings of our inner Selves and to our honest reactions to the external energies that surround us. Marion Woodman, the Jungian analyst, writer and specialist in feminine development research, calls this process, “coming home to ourselves.”


An excellent way to start to know your Self is by taking a good long look at yourself in the mirror. This seemingly simple device is not so easy, as most of us are mirror-shy, accustomed as we are to using mirrors as weapons of Self-destruction. 

  • Sit comfortably and look into a mirror. Resist the urge to check your hair for neatness or your teeth for spinach. Under no circumstance allow your mind to travel toward judgment or critique. And be nice. Spare yourself those nasty little mind-jabs of disappointment and disapproval.

  • Look at yourself as you would a stranger, with an open mind and an open heart. Do not avert your eyes, but employ them in a straightforward, fearless manner. Introduce yourself to the woman you see there. Let your eyes reassure her that you are friendly.

  • Gaze into her eyes to try to grasp the sense of who she might be. Relax into that gaze and stay engaged for as long as you can. Peer into the depths of your being. What do you see there? What memories? What motives? What myths? What messages?

If the eyes are, indeed, the mirrors of our soul, we have much to learn by looking deeply into them. Like sending a bucket into a deep well and drawing up the clear, revitalizing waters of wisdom from the source.

The Queen welcomes questions concerning all issues of interest to women in their mature years. Send your inquiries to


  • Jean Raffa

    Hi Donna,
    I just discovered your blog and am enjoying it enormously! I don’t have a question at the moment; only a few comments. As a writer and a Jungian, I too have been writing about the Queen for years, and am in the process of looking for a publisher for my latest ms. I just want to tell you how much I cherish your unique style and congratulate you on the marvelous work you’re doing for women and society. I shall add your blog to my blogroll immediately!
    Much love and many blessings,

  • kenneth

    The mirror exercise is a very good one. When I first got into Wicca a few years ago, it was part of our basic training.

  • hedgecrone

    Looking into a mirror at my self and seeing myself as if i were looking at a stranger, was a thrilling experience.

  • Donna Henes

    So glad to enjoyed it. Repeat this every so often to keep your inner communication alive.

  • Donna Henes

    May you always see the light of love in your own eyes.

  • Donna Henes

    Welcome the The Queen’s Court, Jeanie. I’d love to read some of your Queen work.

  • White29Lena

    Some time before, I really needed to buy a building for my corporation but I did not have enough money and couldn’t purchase something. Thank heaven my friend suggested to take the loans at creditors. Therefore, I did that and used to be satisfied with my bank loan.

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