Beliefnet
Their Bad Mother
Fearlessness Archives

I’ve been struggling with faith this year. I’ve been struggling with faith for a lot of years, but this year has been particularly complicated, with the death of my father figuring as the most complicated – and painful – of […]

So. Last month I started training for the Tiarathon, a half-marathon that will take place in March, two months from now, give or take. I managed about a week and a half of training and then I got sick. I’m […]

I think that I’ve committed myself to running a half-marathon. Actually, I know that I’ve committed myself, because I announced it on Twitter, and we all that what happens on Twitter stays on Twitter as permanent evidence of whatever it […]

The most viscerally terrifying experience that I had this year: reading ‘Lost Boy’ for BlogHer’s Community Keynote. It was awesome and wonderful and all those things that one expects from feeling one’s fear and doing it anyway, but I was […]

Most of my family has served in the military in some capacity or another. My grandfather was in the (Canadian) Navy. My mother was in the Air Force. My father (pictured above) was in the Air Force. My father-in-law served […]

As I wrote yesterday, I have a complicated relationship with God. Have had for a long time. But I’d always been comfortable with that – until I had kids… I wrote yesterday that I want my children to know God, […]

I think that I might be having an existential breakdown. That, or I’m just exhausted and depressed after a month of dealing with the aftermath of my father’s death. Or both. I think both. The death of my father rattled […]

This is the skyline as we approach our temporary home, the place that we are staying as we attend to the business of my father’s life and death. It’s the sky, behind a thick veil of smoke. Today, a few […]

My husband and children are finally with me now, after two long weeks apart. And tomorrow we say goodbye to my father, formally, for good. And then life will go on. I will continue to struggle through the work of […]

I had said that I wanted – that I needed – to narrate this process, this journey through the experience of my father’s death. But it’s hard. I return to my bed (so far from home) at the end of […]

Previous Posts