The Celebrity Therapist

The Celebrity Therapist

When Someone You Love Relapses

If you read the first paragraph of my blog yesterday I shared that someone I love has relapsed.  When someone close to you relapses you go thru many of the stages of loss similar to the stages of grief when someone dies.  You go thru anger, depression, bargaining (where you try to make sense out of it), acceptance, and letting go.  They also don’t always go in that order either.

I once again am reminded that relapse
is a part of addiction. It takes a lot of compassion to understand
this–compassion for yourself if you’ve relapsed and compassion for others if
they have. Without that compassion, there can be no hope. And without hope,
there can be no sobriety.
One of the first things I had to do was shift from anger to compassion because without it, I was full of resentment, and as you know, addicts and alcoholics cannot live in resentment.


Addicts and
alcoholics sometimes engage in all-or-nothing thinking. In other words, if one
thing doesn’t go right, they often just walk away from the whole endeavor. If
they’ve made just one mistake, they judge themselves harshly or blame others.
This gives them an excuse to give up, but it also keeps them from reaching
their goals.  I did not give up on this person and thank God with some recovery, I realize that this is temporary and this initial pain will pass.  I don’t have to drink or use over it.

When you go into resentment mode if someone 
has disappointed you even once, you dismiss that person as unreliable. That
gives you an excuse not to trust or forgive, but it also cuts you off from
that person.


thinking can be toxic. It cuts us off from compassion. It stops us from moving
forward. It prevents us from helping those we love.

Just because
you or someone you love has made a mistake or even relapsed, don’t walk away.
Don’t think sobriety is impossible. It is
Life is not all or nothing. One mistake is not a guarantee of a
lifetime of mistakes. We can make a bad choice today and still make a good
choice tomorrow. Believing that, will bring you the positive energy you need to
be hopeful and do the right things.  I am glad today I can walk in my dis-comfort with reacting impulsively.


  • Emily Jones

    I was hoping I could write a guest blog on your ( website(, with an article related to your site, I believe this will be of interest to your readers.
    The article will be 100% original, written just for your blog and will not be posted elsewhere. Of course this will be completely free for you, however I would appreciate a live link back to our site. If you’re interested in this idea, please get back to me.
    I would like to add one more thing, I will promote the content on social networking sites which will help the post to get traffic and serp ranking.. If you are looking for li–nk swap from a high page rank site, let me know I can go for that deal too which will be free..
    Thank you so much for your time and consideration.
    Thanks & regards,
    Emily Jones

  • funny quotes

    I love a girl, but I shy to tell her, how can I do? funny quotes

  • Julio Zamudio

    Just wanted to thank you for those words .I’ve been struggling with addiction all my adult life.And sometimes I do get in that mode “it’s all or nothing”.I try not to get on the pity pot , too much ,only sometimes the pain, guilt and shame is overwhelming.Compassion is a very key ingriedient in the process and progress of sobriety . Thank you again and hopefully I’ll be able to write you again.

Previous Posts

Controlling Stress In Addiction Recovery
Stress is a six letter word that is probably one of the most damaging words in the English language when it comes to recovery from an addition. This is true for the "hard" addictions like alcohol and drugs as well as for addictions like ...

posted 3:35:47pm Jan. 27, 2015 | read full post »

Walking Through Fear: What’s the Worst Thing That Could Happen?
Sherry Gaba, LCSW, a psychotherapist and life, love, and recovery coach, is featured on Celebrity Rehab on VH1. Sherry is the author of  The Law of Sobriety, which uses the Law of Attraction to help people recover from addiction. Get your free ...

posted 3:28:09pm Oct. 31, 2014 | read full post »

Why I Created Wake Up Recovery
Four years ago when my book, "The Law of Sobriety: Attracting Positive Energy for a Powerful Recovery" came out I knew there had to be ways to get my message out besides the book so I did speaking engagements, tele-conferences, workshops, ...

posted 3:42:28pm Sep. 17, 2014 | read full post »

When One Addiction Replaces Another: The Rob Kardashian Story
While Rob Kardashian is certainly not the household name of his two sisters Kim and Khloe, he is also not an unknown to those that watch the family reality show “Keeping Up With The Kardashians”. It wasn’t too long ago that Rob ...

posted 1:13:29pm Jul. 30, 2014 | read full post »

Signs Of Danger: When Love Turns To Addiction
Love addiction can be equated to the need to be in a relationship regardless of how potentially damaging, abusive or even potentially self-destructive it may be. Often, when people are in a relationship, maintaining the relationship becomes all ...

posted 2:55:49pm Jun. 04, 2014 | read full post »


Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.