The Book of Acts tells us there are three things that the early church did.  They are pray, study the doctrines of the apostles and fellowship.

At Special Gathering, which is a ministry within the intellectually disabled community, we try to do all three.  The first two are a given.  We have times of prayer during our chapel worship and in our small classes.   We learn from studying the scriptures during our chapel programs.

We have also learned that fellowship is just as important as the other two.  And we try to do it equally as well.  Usually that means having fun together.  Several times a year there is a time of fun for both Vero and Melbourne programs.  In Vero, we may go out to dinner at Boston Market.  When we go, there is a wonderful bonding that always happens.  After one such event, one of our members got off the van, bounced into the house and announced to her caregiver with a giggle, “Linda Howard made us eat too much.”

Once a year, the Melbourne Special Gathering goes to barbecue restaurant.  For years, we’ve had barbecue and french fries.  My personal favorite foods.  After the lunch, most of us head off to a recreation social held by Brevard County.  By the time the day is over at 4:30pm, everyone is exhausted, happy and ready to head home.

Working with teenagers, I learned there are two places that you really learn about your members, transporting them in a vehicle and over a meal.  In each place, there are barriers that are broken down.  The Bible teaches that we are to instruct our children when we walk in the way and when we are at home during meals.  God knew that there is something about these two times that helps make communication possible.  We don’t walk places anymore but we do ride in cars.  In Special Gathering, we transport almost everyone.  I have seen deep and lasting friendships develop between the drivers and members.

I think that part of the effect of being in a car is the closeness.  We are told that each of us has an invisible space that is called our personal space.  And usually, we don’t like people invading our personal space.  However, in a car and sitting at a dinner table, you must sit close as a result we must invade each other’s personal space.  Thus, forcing ourselves on each other in a good and wholesome way.

Part of the joy of our annual retreat, Camp Agape, is that we are able to eat together.  Over the years, I’ve developed a pattern of eating at one of the front tables.  That way, I can see everyone as they stand in line, get their meals and make sure everyone is able to get their food safely to a seat.

For several years, I felt guilty that I didn’t “spread myself around more.”  It seemed that I should sit at different places.  But the times I tried moving around had worked as well as I thought.  I found people were sitting in their own small groups and great friendships were being forged during the meal time.  Small intimate parties have broken out during our dining times.  Fellowship was happening.

God understands us because he made us.  A portion of who we are demands that we extend ourselves to others and become a part of a community.  Perhaps one of the great things about being a part of a cloistered subculture are the intimate and deep friendships that are formed, nurtured and developed among people who love to pray together, study together and have fun together.

Are there some ways that you have learned to mold fellowship times into bonding times?  Who are the people that you have learned to bond with?  Do you believe that meal time adds to that bonding?

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