An Italian, a Frenchman and a Jew arrive in Heaven and each is judged. The angel escorts the Frenchman to his heavenly reward. They enter a beautifully arranged banquet hall with all the foods that a French connoisseur could dream of. All the delicacies of a lifetime. The Frenchman turns to the angel and says “this can’t be mine. I was immoral most of my life and was hardly G-d fearing.”
The angel replies “There is a hitch. Everyday at 5:00pm they will bring in a large pot of soup boiling hot. You will be immersed in it. If you can take the pain you can partake of the banquet.”
“Sorry” said the Frenchman “I just could not tolerate the pain.”
The Italian too is taken to his reward a similar banquet with all the best Italian foods. Again a similar dialogue takes place, the Italian admitting to a life of financial fraud and debauchery. He too is advised that at 5:00pm each day he will be immersed in a boiling hot pot of minestrone and again states that the pain would be too much to bear.
Finally the Jew gets taken to his eternal rewards. A real spread with all the gribbenes, chopped liver etc imaginable. He too cannot believe his luck. “I never went to Shul, hardly kept Shabbat and Kosher, how can this be mine?” Again the same response; “5:00pm each day, boiling hot chicken soup. If you can take the pain the banquet is yours.” “Fine said the Jew, I’ll take it”.
“Excuse me” says the angel but the Frenchman and Italian both declined, what makes you different?”
“I know Jewish functions” he replies “5:00pm is not 5:00pm and the soup is never that hot.”
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