It happened again yesterday. Courtney was at lunch, gabbing with the girls. Her girlfriend Celeste was talking about how hard it’s been for her son to find a job. Lots of nodding heads, we all know how she feels. When your child has problems, you have problems.

There’s at least one person who wants to start a revolution against double dipping in the worry well. Courtney says, “It’s just not healthy. Celeste has plenty of problems herself. She shouldn’t be owning someone else’s problems too.”

Maybe you’ve heard it, the pronoun changes mid-story from she to we: “My daughter’s algebra teacher is so unfair. She couldn’t possibly get all her assignments done, we don’t even have an updated syllabus for the course.”

Setting aside the “who cares” factor, when a good friend is stuck in a “we not she” conversation, the natural thing is to listen, commiserate and politely change topic. So we “uh huh” our way through conversations that could benefit from a different perspective.

Happiness in life depends on perspective. When you have a healthy perspective on how to share someone’s problems without taking on their burden, you’re happier. Trust that God made us as individuals. Help one another- for sure. Live for another- can’t be done. There is only one set of shoulders large enough to bear the burden of His children’s problems. Let the Lord do the heavy lifting.

– Prayables

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