– Dijon vu – the same mustard as before.
– Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.
– A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
– Sea captains don’t like crew cuts.
– Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
– Reading while sunbathing makes you well-red.
– When two egotists meet, it’s an I for an I.
– A bicycle can’t stand on its own because it is two-tired.
– What’s the definition of a will? (Come on, It’s a dead giveaway!)
– A backward poet writes inverse.
– In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes.
– A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
– Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft, and I’ll show you a flat minor.
– When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.
– The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.
– A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
– You feel stuck with your debt if you can’t budge it.
– Local Area Network in Australia: the LAN down under.
– He often broke into song because he couldn’t find the key.
– Every calendar’s days are numbered.
– A lot of money is tainted. It taint yours and it taint mine.
– A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.
– He had a photographic memory that was never developed.
– A plateau is a high form of flattery.
– The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
– Once you’ve seen one shopping center, you’ve seen a mall.
– Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine.
– When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she’d dye.
– Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.
– Santa’s helpers are subordinate clauses.
– Acupuncture is a jab well done.
– Marathon runners with bad footwear suffer the agony of defeat.
– The poor guy fell into a glass grinding machine and made a spectacle of himself.