Parenting on Purpose

Parenting on Purpose

Parenting Tools to Teach Kids to Make Sweet Dreams Come True

posted by srballantine

 

Falling flowersDreams are powerful tools, whether they occur during sleep or daydreams. From their first moments, children experience dreams: they are part of every human experience, a necessary part. We don’t always remember our dreams, or even that we do dream—but we do. There are serious negative repercussions when people are deprived from having dreams, even if those dreams are categorized as nightmares.

No parent wants their child to suffer from nightmares, but having a bad dream is part of our human experience. Sleeping dreams are a product of our subconscious. They help balance our lives and help us work out situations we are going through on a subconscious level. Even though we wish our children “sweet dreams” when they go to bed, for most people dreams seem to be out of our control.

Daydreams are often fantasy-like. While they are part of our subconscious too, it is easier to help steer our daydreams and even come back to them later. Ironically, many of the same people who wish their kids “sweet dreams” at night view daydreams as a waste of time and encourage their children to not “stare off into space.”

Parents have several powerful tools they can use to help teach their children to take control of their dreams—during the day and while asleep. By teaching our children the importance of our literal and figurative dreams, and giving them the power to help manipulate them, we teach them how powerful they are and they can make their sweet dreams come true.

If your child is experiencing a lot of nightmares or unpleasant dreams, a dream catcher may help. Many Native American tribes used dream catchers to help children and adults with their dreams. A dream catcher consists of a hoop with woven net with a hole in the center. Feathers adorn the hoop. The dream catcher helps protect us while we sleep by catching the negative dreams in its net. When the sun rises, the dreams are exposed and are destroyed. Positive dreams travel through the hole in the center of the net and slide down the feathers, falling on us as we sleep.

There are also tools you can use to teach your child to make his positive dreams come true. Many people are familiar with dream, or vision, boards. A twist on this is a “dream pillow” that your child can then sleep on at night.

The dream pillow can take on a variety of forms. Some children want a special pillow they use only when they are having troubling dreams. Others like to speak their wishes into their pillowcase in the evening. This can be done with a parent or alone, and a child of any age can give voice to his dreams and breathe them into existence this way. Writing words and drawing pictures on a pillowcase is another way to create a dream pillow. This can be done by the child by herself or with help of Mom or Dad.

Encourage your child to talk about their dreams, both positive and negative, their literal dreams and what they would like to have happen in their lives. Help them to take charge of their nighttime dreams and to create positive dreams while they sleep. By creating a dream pillow, children are putting a message into their subconscious about what they want. They are also sending that message to the Universe. With no conscious resistance to that desire, they are in alignment with what they desire, and they are on their way to manifesting their desires.

As the song says, “Sweet dreams are made of this…who am I to disagree”?

Please feel free to comment.

© 2014.  Sharon Ballantine.  All Rights Reserved.

 

Parenting Teens: Ditch the Disapproval

posted by srballantine

group of young people It isn’t always easy to watch your children make decisions that are different from what you would wish for them. No matter what, it is important that you be their support system rather than a constant source of disapproval.

Since you don’t really want your children to be your exact copy, you have to allow them the freedom to make their own decisions and to create their own ways of engaging the world. It will be much easier to ditch your disapproval if you have taught your teens to trust their Internal Guidance Systems (IGS) and to be in alignment with their highest selves. This means they are connected to Source and their joy.

You cannot provide a more positive message to your teenagers than empowering them to develop into their own authentic, individual, selves.
When you say one thing, but your vibration (what you’re feeling) contradicts that message, that means you are not in alignment. In this case, your words are loving, with love being the highest vibration in the Universe, but your thoughts are negative. Negative breeds a very different vibration, a much lower one.

Your children are very sensitive to your emotions on a vibrational level. That means you don’t have to tell your son that you disapprove of his behavior, or give your daughter “that” look. They already know. Even though you might say positive words, and while they hear what you’re saying, they feel your vibrational message much more powerfully.

Your children pick up on this dissonance, and not only do they not feel completely loved, but they begin to distrust their own IGS. They want to believe your words, but they will be more profoundly affected by the energy they feel from you than by what you say, or even what you do.

In order for you to have a positive influence on your teenagers, you must be in alignment. Your power as a human being rests in being in alignment. Not only are you at your best as a parent when you are in alignment, but you are at your best as a person, period. This is a powerful example you can provide for your teens.

What does it mean to be a parent in alignment? A parent who is in alignment sees the best in their children and expects the best from them. Your thoughts, actions, and desires for your children need to match.

Since it is challenging for your children to feel your love when you are sending out mixed messages, it is up to you to recognize when you are out of alignment. Once you recognize your need to align, you can do something about it. One simple way to do this is to leave the room for a few minutes until you can feel your energy flow back into alignment.

With this simple positive parenting tip, you again see your children though love. Disappointment disappears and you can appreciate the person they are becoming, even when they are quite different from you.

This allows your teenagers to feel your love is authentic and also gives them a powerful lesson to model when they find themselves out of alignment.

Please feel free to comment.

© 2014.  Sharon Ballantine.  All Rights Reserved.

 

Positive Parenting~ Encouraging Self-Care

posted by srballantine

 

 Teen girl washing her face with water, isolated on blackEver since our children’s first teeth start poking through, most of us are eager to start the process of caring for them by brushing each tooth with tender loving care.  Perhaps we delight in their daily baths as well, because what smells better than a baby after their bath?

 As they start getting older, we teach them how to brush their own teeth and later take their own baths or showers. Most kids love these tasks as they help them foster their independence. As hygiene is an important part of self-care, we want to teach them habits that will serve them. We also take our kids to the dentist and doctor for preventative care or to solve any issues. Many parents start proper nutrition habits from day one as well, hoping to teach healthy eating habits that will last a lifetime.

 As our kids enter their pre-teen to teen years, proper nutrition and self-care can go completely out the window, at least for a time. No matter how well we think we’re teaching them, they may reach a point during these years where proper self-care is not a priority.  And this can be stressful for parents.

 If you have ever tried to force your child to brush their teeth, bathe or eat healthy during these years, you may have experienced how futile it can sometimes be. Here are a few tips to get you through this time with minimal angst.

~ Encourage your child to maintain proper self-care. You can remind them how good it feels (even if it was in the distant past) to have clean teeth, a clean body and a healthy diet.

~Set a good example for your teen. Maintain yourself in a clean and healthy way. Show them you care about yourself.

~You may already know it isn’t very effective to force the issue, so don’t even try. Forcing our kids to do anything they don’t want to do yields very temporary results.

~Realize and accept that at this point in their lives they simply don’t care, are being lazy and have placed what we feel is for their highest good as a low priority.

~ Know that it’s a phase and “this too shall pass.”

~Make it a choice to hold the highest vision for your child no matter what they are choosing. Remember that it is your personal perspective that is determining how you are feeling.

~Remind them that their Internal Guidance System can help direct them to their highest choices by what feels best to them.

Granted, this can be a challenging stage for both parents and teens. We want our kids to feel good and we have certain ideas about what that looks like. If we can approach this phase with more ease and less control, we stand a better chance of inspiring them to their highest choices.

Please feel free to comment.

© 2014.  Sharon Ballantine.  All Rights Reserved.

Normal
0

false
false
false

EN-US
JA
X-NONE

/* Style Definitions */
table.MsoNormalTable
{mso-style-name:”Table Normal”;
mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;
mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;
mso-style-noshow:yes;
mso-style-priority:99;
mso-style-parent:””;
mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt;
mso-para-margin:0in;
mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;}

Teaching Kids The Power Of Choosing

posted by srballantine

 

dreamcatcherWhile we can teach our children that “the world is your oyster,” meaning they have the ability and freedom to do anything they want, it is also important to teach kids the power of choice. On the surface, this may sound like a contradiction — that the nature of choice is equivalent to limitation, but that is not the case at all. In fact, the act of choosing is empowering and will bring abundance into our lives.

Envision you have taken your child to an all-you-can-eat buffet. Their eyes grow wide with delight at the sight of all their favorite foods, especially the foods you never make at home—the ones that are maybe not as healthy for them. You could admonish your child and tell him he must eat some veggies before he can have dessert. You could even fill his plate for him.

You could do that, but what does that really teach your child? It teaches him that food isn’t fun, that there are limits placed on him by others, that he can’t have the good without the bad. It even teaches him that you don’t trust him to make good decisions. And these lessons will spill over far beyond the buffet table.

None of those lessons are the kind of thing I want to pass on to my child!

If we take a positive parenting approach instead, we can guide our child to choose for himself what he wants to select from the buffet.

Help your child by having him check in with his body and his Internal Guidance System (IGS) and ask: “How does it feel when I see tables filled with different foods?”

Does he feel giddy with excitement, or so overwhelmed by all the options he doesn’t know where to begin?

Have him visualize filling his plate so it is overflowing, and eating every bite. Again checking in with his IGS, how does he feel? If he can’t imagine how it would feel, you can help him remember how uncomfortable he felt after eating too much on another occasion.

Next, help him learn the power he gets by choosing. Help him visualize what he really likes the most, even if it is dessert! Guide him to take reasonable portions of the things he likes the most, with the knowledge that he has the freedom to get more if he still has room.

The first time you go to the buffet, your child may still go overboard and fill his plate to overflowing. He might even test your willingness to allow him to choose, and fill his plate with only desserts.

It can be challenging to stand back and allow this to happen, knowing that he may not feel well later. By allowing him to make what appears to be a “bad decision” you teach him wonderful lessons. He learns that he does have the power to choose, that choices have consequences, to learn from mistakes, to check in with his IGS, and to learn for himself what he prefers. Overloading on goodies and having an upset tummy later, or less quantity and feeling well enough to play later.

Now these are the kinds of lessons I want to pass on to my child!

This valuable positive parenting lesson on the power of choice will overflow to all of life’s bounty. By allowing, and even encouraging, our children to “cherry pick” the buffet line and select only the things they love the most, they get to experience feeling joyful, rather than just full!

Please feel free to comment.

© 2014.  Sharon Ballantine.  All Rights Reserved.

 

 

Previous Posts

You Said WHAT is On The Windshield?
The fact that your actions have consequences is a concept that young children don’t always understand. When they are babies, the world revolves around them. Their desires and needs are more important than anyo

posted 8:10:47pm Aug. 27, 2014 | read full post »

The Importance of Eye Contact With Kids
How many times have you most probably said to our kids, “look at me when I’m talking to you?” Why do you suppose you say this? Maybe you want to know they are hearing and paying attention to what you’re

posted 7:53:44pm Aug. 23, 2014 | read full post »

Back To School Help For Reducing Stress
  Kids today suffer far more stress and burn out than you did when you were their age. While no life is completely stress-free, too much stress is as damaging to your kids as it is to you. When your kids are stressed, it’s hard for your life to be peaceful as well. Stress is part of you

posted 2:04:40pm Aug. 20, 2014 | read full post »

Helping Children Through Sadness
    There are times in life when you’re faced with sadness. It happens to everyone. Children are certainly not immune from experiencing unhappy events. As a parent, you can help your children c

posted 2:20:46pm Aug. 16, 2014 | read full post »

Helping Kids Know Why They Do Things
Each of us spends our lives doing things that start from our place of being motivated. We create things that enhance us, do menial tasks that structure our lives and everything in between. But are we moving through life in a deliberate way that is helping meet our goals? Are we following others or f

posted 9:56:16pm Aug. 12, 2014 | read full post »


Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.