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Parenting on Purpose

Parenting on Purpose

Helping Kids Know Why They Do Things

Don'T KnowEach of us spends our lives doing things that start from our place of being motivated. We create things that enhance us, do menial tasks that structure our lives and everything in between. But are we moving through life in a deliberate way that is helping meet our goals? Are we following others or fostering our individuality? Are we making our best choices? And don’t we sometimes wonder why we make the choices we do?

Your children learn about life and motivation to a certain extent from you, so it is important that they become aware of what motivates them and why.

By becoming aware of why they do things, they will become aware of what is true for them and what their inner motivation is which will guide them in making deliberate and conscious choices as they mature and grow.

You can teach your kids to look internally starting at a young age by helping them ask questions of themselves before they make choices or decisions. This helps them be aware of why they are choosing something. A question you can ask a young child may simply be; why do you want to do this? Their answers may be, because it looks fun, sounds fun, my friend wants me to, I don’t actually want to, I have no idea, etc.

Their answers will be simplistic when they are very young but will grow in complexity as they age. There aren’t any right or wrong answers; only those which help them know why they’re choosing what they are choosing, and clarify what they really want.

An older child can ask themselves broader questions like:

~ If I do this, how will I benefit?

~ If I do this, will it take me closer to my goals?

~ Is this who I am?

~ Do I really want to do this?

~ Will I learn something?

~What are the possible consequences?

Asking ourselves questions generally require we answer them, and we at least have a chance to put some thought into our actions.

This practice will teach your kids to discern what is right for them. It will help them know their own truth and at least have the choice to follow what their inner voice is saying. It will guide them in asking powerful questions, which can instill a high degree of clarity. Knowing why we do things holds the power to making conscious choices in our lives.

What are your thoughts?

© 2014.  Sharon Ballantine.  All Rights Reserved.

 

 

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