It isn’t always easy to watch your children make decisions that are different from what you would wish for them. No matter what, it is important that you be their support system rather than a constant source of disapproval.
Since you don’t really want your children to be your exact copy, you have to allow them the freedom to make their own decisions and to create their own ways of engaging the world. It will be much easier to ditch your disapproval if you have taught your teens to trust their Internal Guidance Systems (IGS) and to be in alignment with their highest selves. This means they are connected to Source and their joy.
You cannot provide a more positive message to your teenagers than empowering them to develop into their own authentic, individual, selves.
When you say one thing, but your vibration (what you’re feeling) contradicts that message, that means you are not in alignment. In this case, your words are loving, with love being the highest vibration in the Universe, but your thoughts are negative. Negative breeds a very different vibration, a much lower one.
Your children are very sensitive to your emotions on a vibrational level. That means you don’t have to tell your son that you disapprove of his behavior, or give your daughter “that” look. They already know. Even though you might say positive words, and while they hear what you’re saying, they feel your vibrational message much more powerfully.
Your children pick up on this dissonance, and not only do they not feel completely loved, but they begin to distrust their own IGS. They want to believe your words, but they will be more profoundly affected by the energy they feel from you than by what you say, or even what you do.
In order for you to have a positive influence on your teenagers, you must be in alignment. Your power as a human being rests in being in alignment. Not only are you at your best as a parent when you are in alignment, but you are at your best as a person, period. This is a powerful example you can provide for your teens.
What does it mean to be a parent in alignment? A parent who is in alignment sees the best in their children and expects the best from them. Your thoughts, actions, and desires for your children need to match.
Since it is challenging for your children to feel your love when you are sending out mixed messages, it is up to you to recognize when you are out of alignment. Once you recognize your need to align, you can do something about it. One simple way to do this is to leave the room for a few minutes until you can feel your energy flow back into alignment.
With this simple positive parenting tip, you again see your children though love. Disappointment disappears and you can appreciate the person they are becoming, even when they are quite different from you.
This allows your teenagers to feel your love is authentic and also gives them a powerful lesson to model when they find themselves out of alignment.
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© 2014. Sharon Ballantine. All Rights Reserved.