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Parenting on Purpose

Parenting on Purpose

Teaching Your Children There Are No “Bad” Emotions

face_eggsHave you ever slipped into the idea that your emotions are either good or bad? It is often easy to embrace “positive” emotions while pushing against the “negative” emotions in yourself and others.

You can actually learn from your children when they are very young that there are no bad emotions. They come into the world filled with possibilities and are open to all experiences and emotions. They cry out of discomfort, from being hungry or wet, as freely as they laugh and smile with joy. Children do not later berate themselves for crying earlier. They recognize that is just how they were feeling at that moment, and don’t give it a second thought.

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Everyone starts life this way, but unfortunately, most of us learned to interpret these emotions as being unpleasant, or at the very least, less desirable than the “good” emotions such as joy or love.

Very young children are sponges, so they pick up the reactions of others and learn what is acceptable and how to feel about themselves. This includes feelings, and as an adult, you may not be as comfortable showcasing emotion as easily as you once did.

The first step then in teaching your children to accept the full range of human emotion is to do that for yourself first. If you have to cry, let it out. Worrying about how others will act and think of you only serves to further inhibit your behavior and may pass the same sensibility onto your children.

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What are emotions, anyway? They are indicators, telling you what you are attracting into your life at that moment. Every emotion occurs at a different vibrational frequency and it is possible to create a list of emotions based on their vibration, somewhat like notes on a scale.

The lower vibrations correspond to the emotions you typically refer to as bad or negative. They include depression, anger, and sadness, among others. As you move up the vibrational scale, the emotions and frequency becomes higher. You can move through discomfort, apathy, and contentment in the middle range to joy, excitement, and love at the higher end of the scale.

All of these emotions are important to your life. When you experience something that is uncomfortable, you are vibrating at a lower frequency, which is why you don’t feel as good.

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Rather than shutting those emotions down or trying to avoid those feelings, you must learn how to recognize them and to use them to move you in the direction you want to go. You can actively seek out a way to move yourself up the emotional scale by changing your focus or finding a good feeling activity.

Imagine your Internal Guidance System like an emotional piano. All of the frequencies are present in the instrument, but it is up to you to learn how to play the melody that is most pleasing to you. A talented composer knows using notes all along the scale creates the most beautiful music.

By listening to the lower vibrations, you can create your own symphony. Imagine how boring your life would be if you never had the opportunity to learn about things that are not pleasing to you. After all, it is partly by finding out what makes you unhappy to understand what allows you to feel joy. This is a part of our clarification process and one that is important for our children to learn.

© 2014.  Sharon Ballantine.  All Rights Reserved.

 

 

 

  • Katie Espersen

    Our journey has just begun but the message is already so big and so powerful helping kids who have completed the workbook and awakening their love and strength within. Our mission is to create a world where our children “Lovemore and Fearless” and how we need to do this is by bringing it in to our education system and supporting our children to come together and recognize how we love our self ultimately reflects how others treat us. Instead of separating the bully and the bullied and having the parents deal with the situation, bring the two children together in school and make them have to work together for 2 days and complete a small essay on how similar they really are. “I Lovemore Fearless” education piece teachers outline for grades 3 to 5 is almost done meeting all curriculum requirements. Please share and help us print, produce and get this message into all our schools and programs. Lets stop the increasing suicide rates and depression and anxiety our children are now battling more than ever.
    http://www.ilovemorefearless.com
    Blessings, Katie
    We are whole, we are complete, we are perfect most of all we are “LOVE”

  • Pingback: April 2014 Rundown - 263 Links | Programming Life

  • http://programminglife.net/ mcatlett

    I struggle with this, but know in my heart it’s right. Temper tantrums… ah, the bliss of learning and growing through parenthood! :)

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