Kick in the Tush Club member in good standing, “Thunder Pants,” confesses her ‘weighty sins’ to Our Lady of Weight Loss and receives forgiveness. What’s your dietary sin?
Dear Our Lady of Weight Loss ~
Forgive me for I have sinned.
I fear that I have sunken down to a new all-time weigh-in low. I was going to my group meeting – wherein we weigh-in – and to ensure the lowest possible number, I painstakingly assembled the appropriate weigh-in outfit.
I rolled up all my shorts, tops, bras and under pants, and one by one as weighed them on my food scale.
Just so you know, thong under pants weigh an entire ounce less than thunder pants.
Signed ~ Thunder Pants to Under Pants
All Is Forgiven, Move On ~ Our Lady of Weight Loss
Confess, right now, here on these pages, and receive forgiveness from Our Lady of Weight Loss, enabling you to Move On!
Here are few more LOL Weighty Confessions to get you through the weekend!
Weighty Confession: BUT I only had one spoonful!
Weighty Confession: Vitamin C tastes better than sweet tarts.
Weighty Confession: Carrot Cake is a vegetable, no?
Spread the word, not the icing!
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About Our Lady Of Weightloss"Janice Taylor is a 'kooky genius'"
~ O, The Oprah Magazine
Janice Taylor is a Weight Loss Coach and Certified Hypnotist, author, artist and motivational speaker. She is the author of Our Lady of Weight Loss: Miraculous and Motivational Musings from the Patron Saint of Permanent Fat Removal and All Is Forgiven, Move On: Our Lady of Weight Loss's 101 Fat-Burning Steps on Your Journey to Sveltesville (publication date May 15, 2008). Janice is also the creator of the popular e-newsletter Kick in the Tush Club and a 50-pound big-time-loser.
Books By Janice:
- Green Tea helps to …. Burn Fat NOW!
- Does NAMBY-PAMBY Fit You? -or- Buy a Doormat; Don’t Be One!
- Puzzled? Time to Send a Weird, Phallic & Prickly postcard to a friend!
- How to Buy, Eat, Store the Thirst-Quenching Pomegranate
- How to Survive the Exhausted Modern World
- 9 Steps : How to Move from Fear to Love
- The 3 Deadliest Weight Loss Words
- Take a Bach Break. Lose Weight… Sometimes it’s just that simple!
- Morning Chew: The Epictetus Cure
- Weighty Confession: Pass the Yankee Doodle