Our Lady of Weight Loss

Our Lady of Weight Loss

Star Jones: Addict, Depressed and Honest.

I’ve not been a fan of Star Jones, but I am now.I tuned into Oprah yesterday: “Fat to Thin (and possibly back again) In the Public Eye” (my title; not Oprah’s), which featured Valerie Bertinelli, Marie Osmond and Star Jones. Mercifully, Valerie’s and Marie’s segments were relatively short, affording them enough time to pump out their low-calorie, no-fat, product-paid sound bites … … which brings me to Marie’s answer to Oprah’s question, “Why did you pick Nutri-systems?” Marie’s answer, “Because it is a heart-healthy plan.” Like HOLA? Marie!!? How about, “Because they paid me a ton of money?” You’re not a volunteer, are you? I’m not saying that the plan is not heart healthy, but please, be honest. Tell the whole truth. Marie went on to say that she’s gotten over the ‘need to be skinny.’ Like HOLA? Again! Marie is a size 2. Marie, YOU ARE SKINNY. Yes, you are! Perhaps, you’ve given up being anorexic??? Another Skinny Minnie, Valerie Bertinelli happily announced that she was now ‘sane’ and could live with/accept ‘her muffin tops.’ You know, the ‘fat’ that ‘hung’ over the back of her bikini bottom. I had to look at the video 3 times before I could figure out what she was talking about. It’s not fat. Valerie. Listen up – it’s called flesh. If you put elastic around anything, the flesh bulges. Yes, Valerie appeared in a bikini; via videotape. A commercial she was shooting for Jenny Craig. A bit disappointing. I thought she’s strut her stuff on the show. Anyway, Valerie said (I’m paraphrasing), “If I could do this; create this body. So can you.” HOLA!!! Valerie, not true. Yes, we can create our best selves; and yes, we can exercise and build muscle; and yes, we can connect with our higher selves. And oh YES! Weight loss is a vehicle for reinvention and transformation (which is what I’ve been preaching for years now)……However, Valerie, some of us have intrinsically disproportionate bodies, and no matter how much we exercise, how thin we get, the extra ‘pockets’ remain. Short of surgery, it ain’t going away! I agree in that I tell people, after a lifetime of yo-yo’ing, I permanently removed over 50 pounds, and so can you! But, I do not tell people that you can have the body of Valerie Bertinelli or even me, for that matter, and I’m far from perfect. Whew! (After 50 pounds gone, you think my belly button is tight?)All we want is to let the ‘real us’ out; we want AUTHENTIC HAPPINESS. And yes, Star Jones hit on that topic. She let her ‘real self’ out. She had surgery to tighten her tummy; and she had her breasts lifted. I could see that this was hard for her to say; but yay for the truth! Star, in an honest and measured way said, “I’m still 300 pounds in my head some days,” and she added, “… I was an addict for all practical purposes, that I had never stuck to a real diet, that I’d never stuck to a real exercise program, and that when confronted by my doctor and the doctor said if you don’t make changes, you will die. I had no choice.” Jones said. “When you hear people say, oh, you took the easy way out, I would have longed for an easy way. It was not an easy way. It was this — the hardest struggle of my whole entire life and I still struggle.”Star was the only one who spoke of the psychological side of weight loss; the need to be coached through the various stages of weight loss; the need to connect to a new identity. Star, you have a new identity – or rather you have connected with your ‘real self.’ You cleared out the layers of shame, self-loathing, and allowed yourself to be honest and vulnerable. That’s what helps people. The truth. NOT Hollywood fairy tales.I caution you, however, as one who has walked the talk and knows ‘maintenance’ like no other … you say ‘you were an addict.’ You still are. Me too. The call of the Cheeto has greatly lessened since I lost my 50 pounds 8 years ago, but there are times that the alien voice takes over. Anytime an alien voice tells you to do something that you do not want to do and you do it, in my book (literally – go buy my book Star!), it is the voice of addiction. And now to Oprah. Oprah, it seemed to me that you knew in your heart and soul that the Valerie and Marie parts of your show were ‘weight loss fluff’ meant to please the advertisers. I don’t fault you; just making an observation.Your being, your affect and energy shifted dramatically when talking with Star, because that was a real conversation.Have more REAL conversations, PLEASE. Want more Oprah? KITT Club members Weigh-InThe Golden Globe of Weight Loss5 Fat Burning Questions for Bob Greene and OprahSpread the REAL word … NOT the icing,Janice———————————————————————————–Janice Taylor is a Life & Wellness Coach, specializing in weight loss, reinvention, transformation & happiness, author, seminar leader and 50-pound-BIG-Time-LOSER! Write Janice for an Introductory Coaching Session.For more motivation and inspiration, join the Kick in the Tush Club: Beliefnet Chapter.Pick up a copy of Janice’s latest: All Is Forgiven, Move ON ~ Our Lady of Weight Loss’s 101 Fat-Burning Steps on Your Journey to Sveltesville!“Janice Taylor is a certain kind of kooky genius ~ see if her idiosyncratic diet plan will work for you.” ~ O, The Oprah Magazine

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  • Amy

    Janice — Good call-out on Valerie’s “anyone can have this body” statement! I was thinking, “Yeah, anyone who chose the right parents to give them the right genes to produce ‘this body’ can have it.” The last time I wore a single-digit size was at my bat mitzvah, and no amount of diet and exercise will make my post-pubescent body look like hers.

  • Sule

    Janice, I want to say that I relate a lot to Star. I had the lap-band put it a while back, and unfortunately I had to take it off due to complications. I still managed to put up with it for 2 years despite of my wound not healing. I did lose about 80 lbs. At first, I didn’t want anyone to find out about my surgery, because I didn’t want any criticism. Now, that I don’t have it on, I feel totally different, I FEEL AWESOME! I still weigh over 200 lbs, but damn does it feel good not to be worrying about devices in my stomach and its complications. Don’t get me wrong, I still do recommend the lap band to people, but to first think about it. I thank God for having me here in this world, because during the removal of the band, I did get critical. Anyway, I want to congratulate you on your column and Star on her success.

  • Your Name

    Sule – Thank you for your heartfelt comment. I’m sooo happy that you feel awesome, because that’s the most important thing. That you love and embrace yourself! ~ Janice

  • Janice Taylor, Our Lady of Weight Loss

    Amy, Thanks for your comment. Glad you caught the remark in the same way I did! Janice

  • Anonymous

    I really resonate with this article. I’ve considered the lap-band, but frankly I’ve been a little scared of it. It’s nice to read an article with someone else’s perspective.

  • Amy

    I too enjoyed the show, and have greater respect for Star. I can understand all the problems associated morbid obesity that she described.
    I hope Star continues to maintain her weight loss. Those most successful with surgery seems to depend on the type of surgery. Also, not all celebrities in the limelight are successful. Kirsty Alley had problems with Jenny Craig, and Carnie Wilson’s surgery didn’t last. My heart goes out to all the women who know and understand the struggle.

  • Amy

    I too enjoyed the show, and have greater respect for Star. I can understand all the problems associated morbid obesity that she described.
    I hope Star continues to maintain her weight loss. Those most successful with surgery seems to depend on the type of surgery. Also, not all celebrities in the limelight are successful. Kirsty Alley had problems with Jenny Craig, and Carnie Wilson’s surgery didn’t last. My heart goes out to all the women who know and understand the struggle.

  • Carolyn

    I, too, wanted to watch this show altho I usually don’t watch Oprah. She’s on opposite re-runs of “Law and Order” and I love to watch Bobbie and the blonde cop.
    I caught Star on “The View” several times, but missed most of the fuss. I thought she was having some problems, but didn’t realize how tough it really was for her.
    I think it took a lot of guts for her to appear on Oprah’s show. She sounded rather depressed to me, but maybe that is just the real Star coming out. I think she has done a great job and I wish her all of the success in the world.
    I agree that the other two celebs were rather “puff” pieces and ads for the companies that helped them. Star was the real story.
    I watched Oprah’s expressions sometimes, too. I wonder if she is really back to dieting again? I don’t see any obvious weight loss this year.

  • Janet N

    Hello! We are addicts, and we have the hardest addiction in the world because we need food to survive! And once an addict always an addict. Oprah should maybe take a real deep down look inside her self and admit, she too is an addict!
    We real people dont have the money for surgeries and trainers and weight loss gurus to work with us, but we have each other, to share those embarrassing moments, the fear,doubts and insecurities that come with a lifetime of being overweight. I thank my Higher Power and the program I’m in for my weightloss.
    Kudos to Star, not everyone will admit to their shortcomings, and God bless her for her honesty

  • Muscle Building

    Will power… ever try it?
    The addiction ploy is a cry for help and quite frankly, I personally don’t buy it. I think people have found all kinds of excuses to hide their inadequacies over the years, and this is just another one of them. The only excusable weight problem are those caused by medical issues. All the rest are just jumping on the bandwagon of “blame someone or something else” for my behavior that is so prevalent in society today. Sorry, Star Jones and all the others who don’t like my words… sometimes the truth hurts.

  • Eraxlealtytot

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