O Me of Little Faith

O Me of Little Faith


New Obama Rumors

posted by Jason Boyett

I don’t usually just copy and paste, but these are too good to pass up. Here, courtesy of Christopher Beam at Slate, are 13 rumors the Obama campaign should start disseminating to email forwarders everywhere:

There are many things people do not know about BARACK OBAMA. It is every American’s duty to read this message and pass it along to all of their friends and loved ones.

1. Barack Obama wears a FLAG PIN at all times. Even in the shower.

2. Barack Obama says the PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE every time he sees an American flag. He also ends every sentence by saying, “WITH LIBERTY AND JUSTICE FOR ALL.” Click here for video of Obama quietly mouthing the PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE in his sleep.

3. A tape exists of Michelle Obama saying the PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE at a conference on PATRIOTISM.

4. Every weekend, Barack and Michelle take their daughters HUNTING.

5. Barack Obama is a PATRIOTIC AMERICAN. He has one HAND over his HEART at all times. He occasionally switches when one arm gets tired, which is almost never because he is STRONG.

6. Barack Obama has the DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE tattooed on his stomach. It’s upside-down, so he can read it while doing sit-ups.

7. There’s only one artist on Barack Obama’s iPod: FRANCIS SCOTT KEY.

8. Barack Obama is a DEVOUT CHRISTIAN. His favorite book is the BIBLE, which he has memorized. His name means HE WHO LOVES JESUS in the ancient language of Aramaic. He is PROUD that Jesus was an American.

9. Barack Obama goes to church every morning. He goes to church every afternoon. He goes to church every evening. He is IN CHURCH RIGHT NOW.

10. Barack Obama’s new airplane includes a conference room, a kitchen, and a MEGACHURCH.

11. Barack Obama’s skin is the color of AMERICAN SOIL.

12. Barack Obama buys AMERICAN STUFF. He owns a FORD, a BASEBALL TEAM, and a COMPUTER HE BUILT HIMSELF FROM AMERICAN PARTS. He travels mostly by FORKLIFT.

13. Barack Obama says that Americans cling to GUNS and RELIGION because they are AWESOME.

Brilliant. Awesome. Pass it on.



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Comments read comments(7)
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Haley Ballast

posted June 19, 2008 at 5:06 pm


this is fantastic. i have many friends who literally believe much of the above.



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Jason Boyett

posted June 19, 2008 at 5:07 pm


Count yourself lucky. I have friends who still think he’s an Islamic terrorist.



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helloyellow

posted June 19, 2008 at 11:17 pm


hilarious!



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Bo Lane

posted June 20, 2008 at 10:21 am


I know many people who refer to him as Barack HUSSEIN Obama – putting an emphesis on his name like some old pentecostal preacher who talks loud and speaks only in King James-ish type vocabulary.



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Matt

posted June 20, 2008 at 1:34 pm


I know for a fact he also has Lee Greenwood on his iPod.



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haley

posted June 20, 2008 at 4:00 pm


[Count yourself lucky. I have friends who still think he’s an Islamic terrorist.]Jason I guess that summarizes the difference between living in Seattle and Amarillo…



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Anonymous

posted June 23, 2008 at 4:02 pm


i love humor. this is great. doesn’t really matter whom you support politically. just have fun with it and laugh!



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