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Kim Jong-un Ruins Capricorn For Everyone

posted by Matthew Currie

No matter how you slice the demographic pie, there’s always that one guy who makes everyone else in his group look bad.

Over the years I have known many kind and caring and decent Capricorns. On a bad day, they have a reputation for being a bit stiff, and maybe a little too likely to take themselves (and life in general) a little more seriously than perhaps they should. But like I said, despite the many sweet and wonderful Capricorns I’ve known over the years… there’s always That One Guy who backs up the worst stereotypes and ruins the Sign Of The Goat for everyone else who shares it.

For Capricorn, that guy is Kim Jong-un, leader of North Korea.


One of the problems of taking an astrological look at anything to do with North Korea is the lack of certainty about dates. North Korea in general is notoriously un-forthcoming about even minor details of life within its borders. The birthdates and places of its leaders are no exception. However, we can state with a high degree of confidence that Kim Jong-un was born on January 8… although whether that was January 1983 or 1984, we can’t be sure. Thus we know that his Sun is at 17° Capricorn, and for purposes of this blog entry, that’s all we need to know.

Regardless of the rest of the chart, we know that transiting Uranus has slowed down and gone retrograde within a degree of the exact square to his Sun. That, and we can expect the Uranus Pluto Square to have a significant effect on Kim for at least the next two years. In fact, he came into power as it was coming into effect.

The Sun in the birth chart is your Ego, and oh my… what a bruising that has taken lately for Dear Leader. There is an upcoming movie called “The Interview,” a comedy that tells the tale of a celebrity interviewer who is recruited by the CIA to kill Kim Jong-un. It is a comedy, but Dear Leader is not laughing.

On June 25th of this year, as Mars opposite Uranus was squaring Kim’s Sun, the Korean Central News Agency promised stern and merciless retaliation if the film is released… in fact, calling it “an act of war.” And this without even seeing an advance screening!

Kim’s feathers have been ruffled again recently, with the release of a music video from China, featuring scenes of various people dancing, but with Kim’s head pasted on them. Apparently, Dear Leader is a bit touchy when it comes to people poking fun at him. Like, threatening war-type touchy.

North Koreans in general can be forgiven for being a little behind the curve as far as how information in the Internet Age works, so… if any agents of Kim are out there reading this… please convey this to the Glorious One: there’s a thing called the Streisand Effect. It was named after Barbra Streisand when, in 2003, her efforts to have a photo of her residence removed from the Internet resulted in far more attention being drawn to the matter than it would’ve garnered otherwise. Frankly, only the most diehard fans would normally care about Barbara’s mansion… but thanks to her loud protests, not only does everyone know where she lives, she’s actually got “the Streisand effect” named after her.

I bring this up because Kim Jong-un has recently demanded that the aforementioned video originating in China be removed immediately from the Internet (because, that’s how the Internet works, I guess they figure). If he’d just had the sense (and lacked the inflated ego) required to let it go, no one would have noticed.

As it stands though, Kim has made a mockery of himself where no one would have noticed before otherwise. Do you think Obama and Putin threaten to kill people that parody them? Heck no, they’re too busy killing other people for other reasons entirely, thank you very much. That’s how real leadership works, Kim!

Anyway, here’s the video. Enjoy it as freely and subversively as I do!

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The lesson here is, I believe… lighten up already.

Is Kim likely to learn the lesson that complaining about people trying to make you look ridiculous just makes you look more ridiculous? It’s hard to say. But given that Uranus will still be square Kim’s Sun on October 10… the release date for “The Interview”… and that the release date is only two days after a lunar eclipse which is also square Kim’s Sun, I am willing to bet Kim isn’t going to let this go at all.

Oh: just in case you’re worried that poking fun at Kim Jong-Il and/or North Korea is going to trigger some sort of Apocalypse: please keep in mind that although being scared of North Korea is a popular sport among some commentators and filmmakers, overall, North Korea doesn’t have the technology to deliver a pizza to North America, let alone a bomb.

Finally, while were at it, let’s make fun of Kim’s dad, who was just as monstrous a person as well, and just as fat while ruling over starving millions of North Koreans. Dance, tyrant, dance!

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I Watched Them Kill Eric Garner

posted by Matthew Currie

beliefnet mattew currie astrology eric garnerFirst of all, to my regular readers: there will be precious little astrology in this blog entry. We will return to our regularly scheduled programming next time.

To everyone else: welcome. My name is Matthew. I am a writer and an astrological counselor. It is my job to (among other things) help people understand what has happened in their lives, what will happen, and what they can do about it. Often when we are discussing such things, the subject of “karma” comes up. Like many of you, regardless of your personal beliefs, I have a certain sense that “karma” exists — and yet it’s a remarkably slippery concept to delineate in useful detail.

So, what is “karma,” exactly? The short answer: karma is a metaphysical system by which, ultimately, score is kept on our individual actions and how we act towards others.The longer answer: karma is one of those concepts like “reincarnation” or “God” or “divine will” that I believe in but have a hard time describing. I believe such things are real, and yet in some way they are so large that when I try to describe them or categorize them, I simply can’t.

I believe it’s possible for an earthworm to grasp the general existence of a microwave oven, but I don’t think an earthworm will ever be able to read a microwave oven’s wiring diagram, or understand how one works, or program one. However: should an earthworm find himself in the wrong place at the wrong time with a microwave oven, I do believe that worm will understand there are certain unusual effects happening as a result.

Karma is one of those things I’ve been pondering a lot since I stood there and watched the cops kill Eric Garner last Thursday. It can be used to explain a lot of things… but how much actual meaning does it provide?

I don’t know. All I know is: I was there. I saw it happen.


Karma is (by one definition) the total bonus points and penalties we have accumulated through both past lives and this current one. You could meet and fall in love with and have a relationship with and then break up with pretty much anyone… but the specifics as to the who and why of it is usually where people invoke karma.

The Universe operates according to certain laws, some of which we understand well and some of which we don’t. There are scientific laws, which are testable and well-established… and yet that doesn’t cover everything either. We have had plenty of time to study gravity, and yet apparently it only really works if we invoke “dark matter,” which is an undiscovered invisible something or other that makes up around 90% of the Universe. Ridiculous as that might sound to some, that is the consensus of current scientific thinking.

There are also human laws, which govern how we behave towards each other. These deal with things like which property you can take and which property you can’t, or where you can build your fence, or whether or not it’s okay to drive at a certain speed. Despite being clearly laid out, individual circumstances often require a trial and/or a judge.

Somewhere above (or perhaps beside or below) these laws is “the law of karma.” It is something that I believe most of us instinctively understand, and yet very few of us grasp clearly.

Karma sometimes seems like an attempt to codify something that otherwise would just be considered a wild card. If the bad guy gets away with a dirty deed, we say “the karma will catch up with him later.” We do nice things for others in the hopes that it will generate “good karma” for us, and act like a Get Out Of Jail Free card for something else later.

When something terrible like the death of Eric Garner happens, how much does invoking karma really help? I don’t know. All I can tell you for sure is: I was there. I saw it happen.



Eric Garner ran a convenience store in the neighborhood that I have just moved into. I had never met him, and didn’t know him, but I soon learned from others that everyone called him “Big Eric,” and for good reason. He was huge: six foot three and around 400 pounds. But by all accounts he was a pleasant and gentle person. Big Eric was not the type to use his strength unwisely.

When people see terrible and unexpected things, they’ll often say that it was like “something from a movie.” Watching Eric Garner die wasn’t like that for me. It was more like kabuki. The movements were strangely ritualized: calm, almost rehearsed. I can almost hear a commentary in my head, like a translator explaining the moves and the characters and the subtleties of Japanese culture during a kabuki performance to an uninitiated Westerner.


-Here is Eric, the man from the corner store. He came out to break up a fight, but the men who were fighting left as the police arrived. Eric has done what most would consider to be “the right thing.”

-Note that Eric is a black man. This will affect how many in Eric’s time perceive him.

-The police arrive. They are well armed and white. They know Eric. He has been charged before with the sale of individual un-taxed cigarettes to the people of his neighborhood. This is a common practice in Eric’s time and place.

-Now Eric has become upset. He is tired of being arrested.

-The men the police originally came for are long gone, so the police decide to arrest Eric. Notice how they encircle him. Eric becomes upset at this, waving his hands — not menacingly, but in frustration.

-Four policemen bring Eric down. One of the police officers — a plainclothesman who is dressed like a common citizen — wraps his arm around Eric’s neck. Eric is a large man and it takes four policemen to take him down.

-Although the policemen of this time have been instructed to not use the choke hold, it still happens. These policemen seem unaware that Eric is asthmatic.

-Eric protests that he cannot breathe. After a short time with the plainclothes officer pushing Eric’s face into the sidewalk, Eric’s protests stop. He twitches a little and then moves no more.

-The police officers do not render medical assistance. They try to shoo away the bystanders who are recording all this.

-The police stand around Eric’s motionless body as they wait for the ambulance. Eric does not move When the EMT crew arrives, none of them give Eric CPR. They show Eric approximately the same amount of medical care and attention that porters would show the luggage they were picking up for a trip to the airport.

-The ambulance takes Eric away.


This is what I saw, and this is what still plays in my head. It is Killing Kabuki.


So, karmically, and as an astrologer… what can I say about all this? I don’t have Eric Garner’s birth chart. But knowing my own birth chart, and knowing all the transits to my Mercury that day, I’m going to hazard a guess that as a professional communicator, it is my “karma” to communicate what I saw that day to you now.

Yes. Perhaps it was my karma to move to my new neighborhood last week, and perhaps it was karma that I was across the street with a clear view of Eric Garner as he died. And maybe it’s your karma to be here now to read my words as I relate the tale, so we can all feel better about it.

There. Does that help? I know that, for me, thinking about it that way is a lot easier than dwelling on the knowledge that, at the time, I felt compelled to step in and stop it yet I did nothing… just like everyone else there at the time.

Frankly though: I’d much rather live in a world where Eric Garner was still alive, he remained a complete stranger to me, and I had nothing to say to you about this. I would prefer to live in a world where I didn’t have to notice that one man of one particular skin tone was brought down and killed by other men of a different skin tone over the finer points of tobacco taxation.

Or, who knows? Maybe those cops were just having a bad day, and it was hot, and things got out of hand, and race had nothing to do with it, and mistakes were made.


As much as I want to believe that, I can’t. And neither should you.

And if you feel the least bit differently about this matter… if you want to just take it that way and move on with your busy life… may I kindly suggest you investigate the concept of “karma” a little further yourself?

Want a free e-book? Sure you do! Click HERE!

Questions about your birth chart, or astrology in general? Want to know more about my big discount on readings for new clients? Want a free month of my NEW Subscription Service? Write me for details!

CLICK HERE to join the Oh My Stars Facebook Fan Page, and get exclusive content, an additional discount on a reading, more material on blog entries, AND ANOTHER free e-book!

Weekly Horoscope For Those Still Earthbound, July 21-27, 2014

posted by Matthew Currie

Bad news, everyone: it appears we may all be stuck with this place a little longer than we had hoped. Scientists have announced the first habitable exoplanet discovered, Gliese 581, may not be a planet at all, but simply a misinterpretation of the data. Yes, I am as disappointed as the rest of you, and I too had big plans to relocate somewhere safer and more caring and generally better run.

Oh well. At least we still have Prayer Bear.

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Since we all seem to be stuck with each other for at least a little while longer, let’s have a look at upcoming conditions in the next week.

Uranus stations and goes retrograde on Monday. Good news: a Uranus Station makes your crazy schemes a little more likely to succeed. Bad news: your crazy schemes might just be crazy. Think it through, people.

Your best day of the week overall for human relations may be Thursday. The Sun is conjunct Jupiter, Venus is trine Neptune, and Mercury is trine Saturn. So if you’re looking for a day to eloquently plead for forgiveness or convince someone to cut you some slack, make a note of it.

Mars enters Scorpio on Friday. Frankly, even if Libra was a relatively good placement in your chart, the rest of us of have all gotten sick and tired of Mars in Libra over the last nine months, so deal with it. Mars in Scorpio is not the least bit moved by your tears over this.

The New Moon in Leo is happening Saturday morning in North America. This is always an excellent time to set down your intentions for the following month. It’s like New Year’s Resolutions broken down into 12 bite-size chunks. This New Moon is a little edgier than most, given that it is square that Mars freshly entered into Scorpio, so any of your resolutions that involve “not taking any crap” or “finally facing that situation down” are more likely to succeed.

Now, here’s your forecast:

Aries (March 21 – April 19)
Clams produce pearls because of little grains of sand that get inside them and cause irritation. The first part of the week might be annoying, but the weekend will have its rewards.
Taurus (April 20 – May 20)
If people haven’t been noticing just how magnificent you are lately, you might have to remind them. This week, your words and actions will help do that for you.
Gemini (May 21 – June 20)
Your sign is considered to have a lot of “mental energy,” but the truth is that recently you may have just felt “mental.” Later this week you’ll have a chance to rein it in and get some real results for your intellectual efforts.
Cancer (June 21 – July 22)
Yes, people really do like you. Yes, you really are a good person, and others generally recognize that. Now: project that niceness towards others in your environment, and you’ll get better-than-average results.
Leo (July 23 – August 22)
Prepare yourself for a fabulous week of fabulous fabulousness! By which I mean, “next week.” This week is likely to be more full of minor, petty annoyances than anything else. But really, prepare yourself!
Virgo (August 23 – September 22)
You know that quiet but powerful voice in the back of your head? No, not the one you talk to your therapist about, the one that tells you that life is great and will continue to get better. Listen to that voice, because it’s right. The second one, that is.
Libra (September 23 – October 22)
Make your social connections work for you, in both practical and emotional terms. This weekend could be particularly good for social networking and/or romance. You know you’ve got the charm, now use it!
Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)
If you’re operating from a secure base, you could probably conquer the world. Work on your base and your grounding and your home life this week, and your plans for global domination will be one step closer to completion.
Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)
For others, “are we having fun yet?” may be a rhetorical question. To you, this week, it could become a Mission Statement. Approach your issues joyfully this week, and this month in general, and you’ll be able to achieve your goals.
Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)
Wouldn’t it be great if you could just sort and organize all the people in your life into a neat, efficient filing system? You may have noticed it doesn’t usually work that way, but this week you’ll have reasonably good success putting your human relations into order. Note I said reasonably: they’re still human after all.
Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)
People genuinely like you, cause you’re great person and not just because you spend money on them. Well, this week, they’ll probably like you for both reasons. What I’m trying to say here is: try budgeting your social activities a little more carefully this week, okay?
Pisces (February 19 – March 20)
The more time you spend taking care of yourself this week, the better the rest of your month will go. You might be feeling a little drained, so pace yourself. Doing a little extra work will get you great results, so whatever it is you’re working on, don’t be afraid to put in a little overtime.

Want a free e-book? Sure you do! Click HERE!

Questions about your birth chart, or astrology in general? Want to know more about my big discount on readings for new clients? Want a free month of my NEW Subscription Service? Write me for details!

CLICK HERE to join the Oh My Stars Facebook Fan Page, and get exclusive content, an additional discount on a reading, more material on blog entries, AND ANOTHER free e-book!

The Astrology Of A Customer Service Call

posted by Matthew Currie

Today: a special blog entry that everyone can enjoy, whether they’re into astrology or not. If you are a fan of astrology, read on. If not, skip ahead to the part after the video. Either way, everyone wins!


Astrology can predict the general course of a day, but just because you’re having “good transits” on a day doesn’t necessarily mean everything is going to go your way. Case in point: today, when transiting Venus is conjunct my Jupiter, and transiting Jupiter in Leo is trine my Mercury and North Node and opposite my natal Venus.


Overall, this should be a good day for me. Please keep this in mind as you read on about my attempts to get Internet service at my new apartment — getting the service done on time may have been doomed to failure, but hey, I got a blog entry out of it, right? Keep reading, and do have a look at the bottom of this blog entry for my Specials on both Readings and my new Subscription Service… once I have Internet again, that is.


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I was having a good day, my heart all filled with that love ‘n light feeling that I so often get from the pure thrill of being alive. I had just moved to my new apartment, and it’s a nice place for me to be self-employed. Or rather it will be, once the Internet gets hooked up.   There has been a delay with getting my connection. The installer from my (alleged) future Internet company came by yesterday, sat in his truck outside on his phone for at least 25 minutes, and then called and claimed he would have to return tomorrow — “first thing,” he said — to do the work of connecting one of the world’s newest and most awesome (I’m told) fiber optic networks from somewhere on the street level to my apartment.

I won’t give away the name of the company involved, but if you want to do some research, its name starts with a V (as in “VERY difficult to get things done on time”) and rhymes with “Horizon” (which is a distant point one can see but can never actually reach). This particular company — again, no names! — cut an exclusive deal to provide New York City with a fiber optic network that was supposed to reach everyone by 2014, but thanks to some weasel words in the agreement, only reaches somewhere between half and three-quarters of the city, and mostly the more fashionable and high-end parts of NYC at that.

Here’s a hint as to where I live: if you are picturing the average professional blogger as living in some sort of glass-encased palace like Superman’s Fortress Of Solitude high atop the Manhattan skyline, you need to know more professional bloggers. Ask around at your nearest soup kitchen or dive bar — everyone knows us there.

Like many of you out there, I am self-employed, and my Internet connection is as vital to me as nets are to a fisherman, cutting implements to a butcher, or plausible deniability to a corporate executive or Member of Congress. So, you can imagine my frustration when yesterday the installer… whose name I didn’t get, so I will simply refer to him as “FGWSIHTOHPANGOFHAH” — that’s short for “Fat Guy Who Stayed In His Truck On His Phone And Never Got Out For Half An Hour” — showed up and left without doing anything. After calling me and directing me to go back and forth from window to window in my third-floor apartment so he could size up the layout without actually risking the stairs, FGWSIHTOHPANGOFHAH left saying that he’d be back tomorrow. “First thing!” FGWSIHTOHPANGOFHAH said.

By noon today, FGWSIHTOHPANGOFHAH had not shown up, so I called Starts With V Rhymes With Horizon to inquire as to the installer’s whereabouts. Perhaps FGWSIHTOHPANGOFHAH had succubed to the heat, or had contracted some terrible rare illness that only those who work with one of the world’s newest and most awesome (I’m told) fiber optic networks come down with. That may in fact be what happened, because even after a 47 minute call to Customer Service, Starts With V Rhymes With Horizon was completely unable to contact or locate my new friend FGWSIHTOHPANGOFHAH. I was assured though that we would be contacted as soon as Starts With V Rhymes With Horizon knew what was up, and that with luck I would have my Internet service by the end of the day. As of this writing, that seems really unlikely, but hey… I am a Love and Light kinda guy and I still believe in Santa, so maybe things will work out all right.

However, in the event you ever find yourself in a similar situation, stranded on hold with Customer Service looking for a missing installer, let me leave you with what I said to the Customer Service Rep. Feel free to quote me verbatim (or improvise based on my wording) next time you find yourself in hold looking for your own FGWSIHTOHPANGOFHAH.

“First of all, in case anyone asks, you have done an excellent job. I’ve done your job myself, for a different company. And I want you to know that anyone who calls up and blames you personally for their Internet issues clearly doesn’t get the point of how these things work. “I know that your job is subject to certain metrics, including average call length. But if your job is anything like mine used to be, I know you have a system for exempting call to take a particularly long time like this one has.

“So let me leave you with a final thought, one that will not do your job any harm, and may in fact give you another thing your company a certain sense of perspective.

“You sound young to me (but I won’t ask, because that’s a personal question). Before the dawn of the Internet age, off the top of my head, I can name a number of countries that the United States invaded and/or bombed into submission. Vietnam, Cambodia, Korea, Japan, Germany, and Italy, in reverse order. Next time you’re on a break and standing around the coffee machine with your coworkers… and I do hope your company is not a bunch of jerks who bill you for every cup of coffee, because even the slaves who built the pyramids were given free beer in order to motivate them to keep working… there is a subject I’d like you to bring up with your friends there.

“Of the countries I named (with the exception of North Korea because North Korea is an exception to everything) how many of those countries now on average get faster Internet service than the United States?

“Please don’t take my word for this. You can look it up for yourself, based on the assumption that your Internet is connected, of course. And as a follow-up: if you or any of your coworkers have highly placed friends in the White House or the Pentagon, could you please instruct them to invade and bomb New York City as quickly as possible? If they require a rationale for taking this action, please tell them that although New York City may not currently be packed to the brim with Angry Revolutionaries, but at this rate it soon will be.

“Again: I realize this is not your fault, neither is it your fault that your employer roped New York City into an exclusive fiber optic network deal with your company, which your company is now largely abandoning because 4G service is more profitable, in anticipation of a merger with yet another very large Internet provider — one whose name rhymes with Crime-Scorner. “I’m just saying that Internet infrastructure is now almost as important to the American economy as paved roads and telephone lines once were. For may of us in the modern world, Internet service are part of our means of production.

“To be honest with you, I love capitalism. I am no Marxist. However, even a broken clock is right twice a day, and Karl Marx had certain things to say about people who “control the means of production” that somewhat ring true to me… and these things have certainly been enough to spur a lot of anger and brick-throwing over the years in various places. And if there is one thing history has taught us, it is that (at least in the short term) a mob of angry peasants with torches do not always make the wisest long-term decisions for either themselves or others. Thus, I figure a quick and easy wave of Predator drones directed against the Big Apple could ultimately be good news for everyone, and would likely get me world-class Internet sooner.

True Story: There’s an Internet company that can get you a 40 mb/second connection in Baghdad!

“So: I urge you to discuss these matters, calmly and rationally, with your coworkers and/or The White House and/or The Pentagon. Because I’m guessing that the system you have in place right now works just fine for your CEO… who, by the way, made over $36 million in 2012… but for the rest of us? Not so much. “In conclusion: I do hope they aren’t billing you for your coffee. Thank you for your time… now, you get back to work. Pharaoh’s Pyramid ain’t gonna build itself!”

Want a free e-book? Sure you do! Click HERE!

Questions about your birth chart, or astrology in general? Want to know more about my big discount on readings for new clients? Want a free month of my NEW Subscription Service? Write me for details!

CLICK HERE to join the Oh My Stars Facebook Fan Page, and get exclusive content, an additional discount on a reading, more material on blog entries, AND ANOTHER free e-book!

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