Movie Mom

Movie Mom


G.I. Joe: Retaliation

posted by Nell Minow
B
Lowest Recommended Age:Middle School
MPAA Rating:Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of combat violence and martial arts action throughout, and for brief sensuality and language
Profanity:Some mild language
Nudity/Sex:Character watches a woman undress to her underwear
Alcohol/Drugs:Drinking, prisoners are drugged
Violence/Scariness:Extensive action-style violence, characters injured and killed, knives, chases, explosions, mass destruction of an entire city
Diversity Issues:Diverse characters, very strong women
Movie Release Date:March 29, 2013
DVD Release Date:July 30, 2013

As big, dumb, action and explosions and “hell, yeah, ooyah” movies based on toys go, this one is a lot of fun.  Jon M. Chu, director of two of the “Step Up” movies and producer of the third knows how to shoot movement and understands pacing and tone.

In an opening lifted from “The A-Team” (and others) our heroes, the “Joes” elite military unit saves the day and then gets discredited after an ambush wipes out almost all of them and the President of the United States (Jonathan Pryce, having a lot of fun) goes on television to say that the Joes betrayed our country by trying to steal nuclear weapons.

If the Joes are not traitors and the President says they are, something must be wrong.  The surviving Joes include Roadblock (Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson) and Lady Jaye (Adrianne Palicki).  Dodging the various bad guys trying to kill them, they find their way to the original Joe, retired General Joe Colton (a tough, wry, and completely terrific Bruce Willis), and (spoiler alert) save the day.  Until next time.

When a movie begins with a big Hasbro logo, we know we’re not here for the witty repartee.  This is a movie based on toys.  That’s why it does not really matter when it seems like the script was inspired by listening in on a group of seven year-olds making up stories for their dolls, I mean action figures.

And the dialogue is surprisingly entertaining after all, delivered with great relish by two masters of tough guy witticisms, plus reigning sexiest man alive Channing Tatum.  “Brazil’s” Jonathan Pryce has some choice moments, explaining one of the benefits of being President: “I got to hang out with Bono.”  And he gets to blow stuff up.  “It’s good to know we’re not running low on crazy,” he smiles when welcoming some bad guys to the party, and he plays a game on his phone in the middle of a meeting of world leaders.  There are even a few shrewd political jibes, and some patriotic references to Fort Sumpter and the American Revolution.  And there’s a bad guy with an oxygen tank like Darth Vader and Bane who is more into putting his logo all over everything than Donald Trump.  He even brands his weapons of mass destruction.

Roadblock, asked to say some words of inspiration before going into battle, calls on a noted theologian: “In the immortal words of Jay-Z, whatever deity may guide my life, dear lord don’t me die tonight.”  And there’s plenty of  deadpan tough guy talk.  The other side’s weapons are “cold war stuff but it will still put a hole in you.”  Roadblock wants to vanquish the bad guys in time to get home for “Top Chef.”  And he loves his little girls.

But we’re here for the stunts, and they deliver, especially one bravura fight that’s part bungee cord, part rappelling rope, part zip wire.  With ninjas.  In 3D.  That’s worth your price of admission right there.  These are guys who literally bring a knife to a gun fight and make it work.  Ooyah.  On to #3.

Parents should know that this film includes constant peril and action-style military violence with guns, explosives, swords, knives, and martial arts, cataclysmic damage, characters injured and killed, brief disturbing images, brief scenes of a woman in skimpy clothes, and some strong language.

Family discussion: Who is Storm Shadow loyal to? Why did Roadblock take the dog tags? What would your “Joe name” be?

If you like this, try: the first “G.I. Joe” movie and “The A-Team”



  • http://AddaURLtothiscomment Joanie

    Hi Nell, I didn’t see a grade on this one (but I did see one on the others). What did you give it? Sounds like a good one, but just curious.

    • Nell Minow

      Sorry, Joanie — thanks for letting me know. I’ve re-published with a B.

  • http://AddaURLtothiscomment Joanie

    So we saw it today (Easter) and I like it okay, but all the ninja stuff just made me think of some grown up Power Rangers. (Which I loved when the kids were little, but I think it was a bit overblown here.) Me and the 3 teens went. 2 of us liked the first movie better and 2 of us liked the 2nd movie better. Therefore, I say check it out! It’s a fun ride either way!

  • http://AddaURLtothiscomment Joanie

    OH, and let me say this, as a parent of teen boys, I REALLY appreciated it when they visually muted the scene of Jaye changing out of the red gown. I always groan when things get too sexy and my boys get embarrassed in front of their mom so they cover their eyes.

Previous Posts

Annie
The story of the plucky little Depression-era orphan with the curly red hair has been not just re-booted but re-imagined into the world of rent-a-bikes, viral videos, DNA tests, YOLO, corpora

posted 5:59:13pm Dec. 18, 2014 | read full post »

Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb
Fans of the first two "Night at the Museum" films will like this one because it is pretty much the same film. They go to another museum, this time the British Museum in London, and the exhibi

posted 5:23:46pm Dec. 18, 2014 | read full post »

Listen to People's Lives: David Plotz's Working Podcast
Former Slate editor David Plotz, now at Atlas Obscura, says that he is a big fan of Studs Terkel's classic book Working: People Talk About What They Do All Day and How They Feel About What They Do. He has paid tribute to that great work in the best possible way, by updating it with his podcast seri

posted 3:59:23pm Dec. 18, 2014 | read full post »

Little Orphan Annie: From Comic Strip to Radio, Broadway, Television, and Two Movies
The spunky little girl with the curly red hair and a dog named Sandy began as Little Orphan Annie in 1924, created by Harold Gray.  Her pluck, self-sufficiency, and resilience cau

posted 8:00:48am Dec. 18, 2014 | read full post »

A Trailer for A Movie You'll Never See: Moonquake Lake with Mila Kunis and Rihanna
"Moonquake Lake" has a lot of star power behind it -- "LEGO Movie" directors Chris Miller and Phil Lord and stars Mila Kunis, Ashton Kutcher, and Rihanna. And it looks....intriguing, some sort of "Twilight"-style supernatural teen romance. It just isn't real. "Moonquake Lake" is a movie with

posted 3:54:43pm Dec. 17, 2014 | read full post »




Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.