Advertisement

Movie Mom

Movie Mom

Without a Paddle

posted by rkumar
D
Lowest Recommended Age:Mature High Schooler
Profanity:Strong language for a PG-13
Nudity/Sex:Strong sexual references and situations for a PG-13
Alcohol/Drugs:Drinking, marijuana
Violence/Scariness:Comic peril and violence, a lot of shooting
Diversity Issues:Homophobic humor, misogynistic humor
Movie Release Date:2004
D
Lowest Recommended Age: Mature High Schooler
Profanity: Strong language for a PG-13
Nudity/Sex: Strong sexual references and situations for a PG-13
Alcohol/Drugs: Drinking, marijuana
Violence/Scariness: Comic peril and violence, a lot of shooting
Diversity Issues: Homophobic humor, misogynistic humor
Movie Release Date: 2004

“Without a Paddle” is also without talent, originality, anything to laugh at, or a reason to buy a ticket.

The opening moments of faux home movies showing four boys up to all kinds of faux hi-jinks, and then we then meet up with only three of them as adults, so we know where this is going. Yep, one of them dies and the other three decide to salute his memory by taking the treasure map he left behind for them in the old treehouse so they can go off in search of treasure and find themselves, the meaning of life, and maybe some money, too.

And we will not be surprised that one of them will be successful but repressed and phobic (Seth Green as Dr. Dan Mott), one will be an irresponsible and substance-abusing but fun-loving guy who’s catnip to the ladies (Dax Shepard as Tom), and one will be unhappy in his boring job and unable to commit to his beautiful girlfriend because he just can’t grow up (Matthew Lillard as Jerry).

Ready with the life lessons? Ready with the poop humor? Ready with the rednecks armed with enough firepower to invade several countries, but who, even equipped with laser-sights to ensure accuracy and automatic firing to ensure, um, mayhem, can’t seem to hit anything they aim at? Ready with the bear? The rapids? The beautiful hippie chicks named Flower and Butterfly living in a tree and eating bark? The guys having to huddle together for warmth despite a lot of “I’d rather die” homophobia? Burt Reynolds as Grizzly Adams, playing a bearded old hermit still doing “Dy-no-MITE” jokes because he hasn’t seen television since “Good Times” in 1971? Then get in that canoe and start paddling.

Or not. This is just a massive waste of time for everyone involved. There is not one joke that hasn’t been seen before and done much better. Most of them are just silly or gross rather than funny anyway. The purportedly heartwarming moments are cheesy and insincere.

Director Steven Brill is responsible for directing atrocities Mr. Deeds and Little Nicky and writing the terrible Ready to Rumble. He deserves to be put in a canoe without a paddle for this one.

Parents should know that the movie has a lot of very strong material for a PG-13 including a lot of “action” violence (a lot of shooting with very powerful weapons but hardly any blood and no one seriously hurt), comic peril (including a bear attack and many dangerous encounters on the river), and some graphic images (sewing up a bloody wound, a skeleton, lots of poop). There are many sexual references and situations, including references to peeking at a girl’s “downstairs,” a pierced “downstairs,” and a lot of homophobic and misogynistic humor. A woman’s unshaven leg is as scary as Sasquatch. Characters use strong language. Characters smoke and drink beer, other characters are drug dealers, and getting stoned is played for humor.

Families who see this movie should talk about what Tom, Jerry, and Dan learned from the trip. How did each of them decide what was really important?

Families who enjoy this movie will enjoy the better City Slickers. They might also like to take a look at the website maintained by Julia Butterfly Hill, who lived in an ancient redwood for two years to protest environmental abuses.

Previous Posts

Who is Surprised that a Faith-Based Film Beat Zac Efron and Owen Wilson?
The end of August is traditionally one of the year's low points when it comes to Hollywood releases. So it was not surprising that the powerhouse "Straight Outta Compton" lead the box office, far ahead of the two new releases, the Owen ...

posted 5:00:55pm Aug. 31, 2015 | read full post »

Interview: Alex Sheremet on Woody Allen (Part 1)
Alex Sheremet is the author of Woody Allen: Reel to Real, an in-depth exploration of the work of one of the most prolific and singular ...

posted 3:33:45pm Aug. 31, 2015 | read full post »

Opening this Week: A Walk in the Woods and Learning to Drive
This week, two movies are based on first-person accounts by writers telling their own real-life stories. In The New Yorker, Katha ...

posted 3:15:50pm Aug. 31, 2015 | read full post »

Tribute: Wes Craven
We mourn the loss of director Wes Craven, who knew what scared us and knew how much we loved being scared.  His series films included "Scream," "Nightmare on Elm Street," and "The Hills Have Eyes." My friend Simon Abrams interviewed Craven for ...

posted 10:53:30am Aug. 31, 2015 | read full post »

Interview: Rachel Hendrix of "77 Chances"
Rachel Hendrix plays Mac in the faith-based romantic film "77 Chances." It's a "Groundhog Day"-style story about a young man who feels lost ...

posted 3:39:15pm Aug. 30, 2015 | read full post »

Advertisement


Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.