This weekend I overheard my husband correct my son for taking the ‘biggest piece’ and it got me thinking about the way in which our children learn to understand giving and taking, which ultimately transcends to how our children understand money.
If Caidin doesn’t take the biggest piece, then he leaves it for someone else, who in turn can have the biggest piece. What does this tell Caidin? That he doesn’t deserve the biggest piece, or that he should assume someone else would want the biggest piece and their desire is somehow more valid than his or that someone else is more worthy of the biggest piece?
We do have a responsibility to teach our children manners, respect and to have empathy, but I’m really challenged with the idea of teaching our children that they should take less or have less. When we tell our children to leave the bigger piece it sets up a dynamic of lack and limit and it also sends a message to put the needs of others before your own.
It’s a fine line here, because we do want our children to be conscious and aware of the needs of others, but, I don’t believe, at the cost of their own health, wellness and happiness. Money and money issues boil down to two questions: What can we have? and What do we deserve? If we program our children through comments and correction to believe that they should come last, or that the biggest piece is reserved for someone else, in the end we are setting them up to struggle with what they know they want verses what they feel they can have.
When I look at Caidin I see a child who is willing to share, he is giving, he is loving and he is compassionate. If he has all of this, do we really have to worry that by letting him take the biggest piece he will become a selfish megalomaniac?
I haven’t come to any ‘aha’ moments on this one yet. I just wanted to share this pondering question because I think it is linked to so many aspects of who our children will become.
What are your thoughts?
© 2012 Christine Agro
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Christine Agro is a spiritual teacher, clairvoyant, naturopath, Master Herbalist, conscious mom and author of 50 Ways to Live Life Consciously as well as of The Conscious Living Wisdom Cards (Special Moms’ Edition). Christine is founder of The Conscious Mom’s Guide , a membership site where she helps support you on your own journey of living life consciously and on your journey of being a Conscious parent. You can also join Christine on Facebook. To contact Christine, invite her to speak or to schedule an appointment with her please email her.