There are times when I lose my patience with Caidin and I absolutely do not like it.
In my meditation this weekend, I decided to focus on understanding this dynamic. I was reminded of the old adage, ‘If you ask for patience, you aren’t given patience; you’re given many opportunities to develop patience.’
It’s true, when we live unconsciously, all we can do is receive the same lesson over and over until, through some chance, we discover what it is that we were looking for.
When we live consciously we don’t have to leave it to happenstance, we can actually take the lead in our own growth process.
Think of it this way: the room you are in is dark; you know you need to find some light, but you aren’t sure how to do that. If you know that the room is dark because a bulb is burned out, you can set about replacing the bulb and getting the lights on. Or, if you know where the light switch is, you move to turn the lights on. Our own growth is very similar, we can bump around in the dark, hoping to find the answer, or we can gain conscious insight into the why, how and what-for and then set about creating change.
So what is patience? How do we develop it? Why don’t we have it in the first place?
I always want to understand what I’m working on and what contributes to my experience. That knowledge is what actually lets me create change in my life. When it comes to patience I want to know what makes me/us react or act in the way that we do. Why do we snap? Why do we become anxious or agitated? It is so much easier to change our behavior if we simply understand what fuels it. That is the basis of Conscious Living; it’s the ability to understand why our lives happen the way they do, to see and understand our preconditioned responses and to consciously set about experiencing our lives in the way we choose, not in the way they just happen to unfold.
In my meditation space, as I looked at my question about ‘patience’, I was guided to the same place I always seek, the root of the issue. I wanted the what-is-behind-all-of-this insight.
Here’s what I found about patience or more aptly about impatience. Impatience emanates from several dynamics – lack, limit and invalidation.
When we feel like we don’t have enough time, or enough space we can react with impatience. When I stopped to think about the times that I’m impatient with Caidin they revolve around moments when I’ve subscribed to the notion of lack – time is an issue or money is an issue – I believe that there isn’t enough of something. The times when I have a beautiful flow going with Caidin, is when I’m open, in the moment, expansive, relaxed and in alignment with my life.
We can also have impatience when we feel invalidated or we are dealing with an emotional wound. The energy rises up because we feel unsupported or as though our own needs don’t matter. But even this trails back to lack. We feel a lack of love or a lack of acknowledgment.
Now when I feel impatient, rather than engaging the energy, I stop myself and release lack energy – I envision a bubble and let the energy go with my breath – and then I set my intention to expand into the space I just created by releasing lack.
So far, so good. Patience has come home!
For those of you who are new to energy work, you may be thinking ‘how can that change anything?’ All I can tell you is that it can and it does. Our lives are really not that complicated, they only become complicated because our minds create fantastically intricate fabrications with lots to do. When you start to live life consciously, life really is that simple.
If patience is something you have been grasping to create in your life, be conscious of what is happening at the moment you feel impatient. What are you feeling, what are your thoughts? As you gather your own insight, you’ll be able to understand what contributes to your impatience and begin to create change.
And remember; try to be patient with this process. 😉
© 2012 Christine Agro
Christine Agro is a clairvoyant, naturopath, Master Herbalist, conscious mom and author of 50 Ways to Live Life Consciously as well as of The Conscious Living Wisdom Cards (Special Moms’ Edition). Christine is founder of The Conscious Mom’s Guide , a membership site where she helps support you on your own journey of living life consciously and on your journey of being a Conscious parent. You can also join Christine on Facebook. To contact Christine or to schedule an appointment with her please email her.