Though we find no evidence of anything noble in someone who has betrayed us, neither is there anything noble in our bitterness.
Question: Someone I love has hurt me deeply, betrayed my trust, and now I don’t know how I should feel about this person. Should I forgive and forget, or try to find another who won’t be the same way? Seems […]
Question: I’ve seen that I’ve said and done some terrible things to people in my life. How do I get through this guilt and shame? Is there a right way to make amends to the people I’ve wronged? Answer: Oh […]
Question: Is there any value to “clearing away” the wreckage of the past? It seems to help, yet I feel wrong in trying to correct so many wrongs that are behind me. Answer: The wreckage of the past exists only […]
In order to let go of any painful past condition — so there is never again a moment where regret or sorrow is pulling us down — we must allow every movement, each unexpected event encountered, every thought and feeling […]
Question: How can I move beyond a painful regret? Answer: Events demand decisions. Choices must be made. And we do the best we know how in any given moment. Even so, we often err and choose against ourselves. For a […]
Without our unconscious consent, regardless of what we may have done against others, or ourselves, the past is powerless to punish us in the present moment.
Real love can never betray you… for when you start with, and then endeavor through what love asks of you, you will come to know this greatest of truths that sets you free: love’s endpoint begins – and has always […]
Question: What is the role of guilt? And what is the role of self-blame for personal wrongs committed? What about confession of sins? Answer: The role of guilt belongs to the self-wrecking parts of one’s self that persist in unconsciously […]
A big part of our inner work in all of our relationships involves remembering this key idea: whenever we are not present and properly attentive to ourselves, we may be sure the false self is busy attending to something we’ll […]
Question: I’ve said and done some terrible things to people in my life. How do I get through this guilt? Is there a right way to make amends to people I’ve wronged? Answer: Yes. Change yourself. In the long run, […]
Whatever justifies the unconscious suffering inherent in anger, blame, or bitterness is, itself, a part of — in league with — these same negative states. And that’s what we have to see if we ever want to be free of […]
Life is trying to reach us and teach us, through our experience of it, that we need new and true answers. These higher answers serve as a special kind of personal shelter that effortlessly keeps out what is harmful and […]
Question: I had a friend for 5 years, and out of the blue I made a simple remark…and now she is not my friend anymore! I apologized, and she said she forgives me, but it’s obvious she holds a grudge. […]
Until we awaken enough to see that within us lives the same nature as our “enemy” of the moment, we will never know the freedom or the forgiveness found in this great liberating truth: no enemy exists for us until […]
Our task, if we want to be free human beings — if we want a life in which we no longer carry around with us “what he did,” “what she didn’t do,” “what never worked out” — begins with discovering […]
Question: What about the idea of repentance? On one hand, being repentant for ourselves — as certain old religious teachings say we should be — seems as much a part of being self-punishing as is just “cutting loose,” going wild, […]
There are those who will tell you why it is wise to never forget the pain of the past . . . but if you look closely at the anger, sorrow, and bitterness that has hardened their faces, then you […]
Listen! There’s no such thing As no chance For redemption, As long as the Soul accepts God’s correction. And tho’ at times He may feel Heavy-handed, This weight is naught But His Light Having landed.
Question: Recently a relative asked to live with us. The moment we heard from her, I sensed she was to help me with something. Two weeks later we were talking, she started to cry, and said she had had an […]
The spiritual work of letting go and of growing into our native holiness is unlike any other kind of effort one will ever have to make. It starts with embracing — and then daring to act upon — the understanding […]
QUESTION When do you know that you have truly forgiven someone? Although I have forgiven someone and myself, the pain still comes back at times.
Several times each week, at a minimum, I receive a certain type of email… whose similar question or concern comes from people all over this globe, but whose “heart” is one and the same for all people in all places: […]