Letting Go with Guy Finley

Letting Go with Guy Finley

The Endlessness of Real Love

posted by Guy Finley

Have you ever seen in a relationship that you have with someone that the alignment is starting to go off (so to speak) and you can see the car starting to drift? So, you grab the steering wheel — meaning you grab hold of that person to try to manipulate their behavior — because you know if the car keeps drifting — meaning if they keep doing what they’re doing — you know the car is going to crash! Then you start to pressure the person in subtle ways in order to make sure they go down the road that you think leads to the end you have in mind… and how do you like people with their hands on your wheel? Isn’t it true that the more a person tries to determine what you should do to fulfill their idea of love, the less love you feel for them? We don’t see it happening. For one thing, we’re captives of the fear of the crash.

Gradually, a person becomes so identified with what they want, that in the process of being identified with it, they start to fear that the end in mind won’t come to pass as has been imagined, and the end not coming to pass means the passing of themselves. “I’ll lose myself if I lose you.” The moment “what has to happen” becomes set in one’s mind, then everything that produces the possibility of a viable and whole relationship is choked off.

It is in the recognition of this identification that you begin to not be so consumed with yourself. If in any given moment, for instance when someone is speaking or you’re with friends, it were possible for you to be experiencing an endless world, wouldn’t you think that would be preferential to a world you’re always trying to keep from ending?

When you look out a window, or you go outside at night, your eyes can only go so far. We’re not conscious of the fact that our vision has an ending point, because we’re caught up by the objects in it, meaning we’re caught up with our consideration of what we see, not the fact that our vision has a limitation to it. Our eyes have an end to what they can see. Love is seeing the beginning and the ending at once and realizing that one is a part of the beginning and the ending all at once, and all at once it is taking place inside of a human being.

We are created by Love. Inside of us is Love. Love is what realizes Love. Love is the only thing that can know Love. Love has no end in mind except for the fulfillment of itself. Therefore, it isn’t trying to make anything happen. It isn’t trying to control someone so that one can keep their love in place.

Let Go and Grow into Relationship with Real Love

posted by Guy Finley

Isn’t it frustrating that on one hand you know that you’re supposed to have nice relationships with everyone, and yet you have almost no relationship with anyone that actually is nice? It’s a real grain of sand in one’s soul… as well it is intended to be!

If it weren’t for the fact that we recognize, however slightly it is, that our irritation with the person that we’re with has something to do with us, then there would never be a chance for us to discover anything greater than what we presently call our idea of love.

The world that you and I live in has almost no idea at all about love. Real love takes work. You say, “I know; I’ve been carrying this guy for about forty years!” That is not the work it takes. Just like a garden, you have to do a lot of work when you first put in the seeds. The work that has to do with love in a relationship has nothing whatsoever to do with bearing the unpleasant manifestations of another person, but of bearing what is unloving in you when those unpleasant manifestations reveal that un-lovingness in you. That is the work.

Let Love Teach You About a Greater Love

posted by Guy Finley

In its essence, every relationship in life between you and another man or woman is a reflection of the one relationship that produces it. There is one relationship that is the father, the mother of all relationships — just as there is an ocean that is the father, the mother of every raindrop, stream, and bay. Just as there is the one that gives birth to the many, so is there the one relationship that is the parent of all relationships.

Those of us who wish to have a life in the Light, who want a God-centered being, who want to know what real love is, those of us who are not satisfied with what we have been able to tell ourselves about love, have a chance for Love to tell us about itself. Every moment is an invitation on the part of Intelligence, God, the Living Light, for us to experience our relationship with it.

This life that we’re in is a preparation for a different order of love. If we aren’t too damaged before it gets going, we start with one another. We learn what it means to think about another person and put them before ourselves.

The problem is, most of us only appear to think about putting others first because that gets us in first place. When you first meet someone, you throw rose petals down in front of their feet, and all you do is think about them. But the minute you land them, it changes to “Why aren’t you thinking about me more?”

You fall in love with a person, but at a certain point you hurt the other person that you formerly wouldn’t dream of hurting. In that moment, you can look back on yourself and ask yourself, “Where did that anger come from? What was that cruel act that I did? What happened to my love? Where did the love go?” It’s really a critical question that, in this world, has no answer among the human beings who believe that love has something to do with fulfilling the desire that one has for another human being. Desires are as short-lived as spring flowers. They belong to a certain phase of the development of any particular whole octave of any year, but as soon as the season passes, goes with it the beauty. The same thing is true with our initial love.

This nascent love, this first love, is itself an indication of the possibility of a greater love. The initial opening of that little part, and the little outflow of emotion that is called love, is intended to lead a person (if they’ll follow it) to the source of love – which is neither themselves or the person, but each of them being a part of the whole of something greater.

Choose to Remember

posted by Guy Finley

How to stop thinking and start seeing…tree trunks, bare branches, sunlight

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