Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

Law of Attraction in Action: Hidden Agendas

LOAlogoBLOGThis is post 255 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to manifest your desires.. I do it every day! Read all the posts in my Law of Attraction in Action Series to see how.

One of the blocks to manifesting more money that really hit home for me when I was writing Tapping into Wealth: How Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) Can Help You Clear the Path to Making More Money, with the fabulous Margaret M. Lynch, the leading expert for finding and clearing block to getting more money, was that I and many people have hidden agendas when it comes to your desire to manifesing more money or success.


Hidden agendas are many things you’ve connected to achieving your desires. It’s usually an extra benefit of reaching your goals, that has nothing to do with the goal itself. Often these agendas are tied to something you want to prove. “When I reach my goal”:

•    I’ll finally feel validated that I was right about choosing  my career path.
•    I’ll finally prove to my family/teachers that I’m smart and talented.
•    I’ll finally prove to my father that I’m not a loser.
•    I can’t wait to see their faces when I get promoted.
•    I’ll finally show that I’m good enough.
•    The boss who fired me will be sorry when he sees how far I’ve come.
•    I’ll finally earn everyone’s respect.


These agendas often fill an emotional need that pushes you to succeed. I recognized a hidden agenda in me that I’d never considered. Growing up I was very creative and had non-traditional visions of things I wanted to do. Most of my family went on to get illustrious degrees that led to prestigious careers. I got married at twenty and settled for being a teacher, which I never wanted to be. But I married a teacher and everyone pushed me to do it. Since I was a DoorMat, I did what I was told.Tapping cover


Over the years, nobody took me seriously when I talked about reinventing myself and I felt like the black sheep of my family. Everyone saw me as a flake when I became the first white female rapper on a dare, and one of the first women to start a record label. Those were huge accomplishments but seemed odd to traditional people.  It made me feel badly about myself and hurt my self-esteem. I carried those feelings with me for many years.

As I wrote Tapping into Wealth, I recognized that I had a hidden agenda—a reason to succeed that had nothing to do with my actual goal.  I had attached my need to validate my talents and ability—to prove that I deserved to be taken seriously and get respect. I wanted to show my family that they were wrong about me! But that’s not a good reason to go after a goal! It puts negative emotions on it. All those all feelings played into the vibration I sent to the Universe and they became block sto my getting the money and success I desired. Plus, wanting to prove something to someone can add more pressure to your efforts to achieve your goal, and pressure stresses you out, which adds more negativity to your manifesting vibration.


If you’re not achieving your goals, think about whether you have an personal agenda and are going after it to show someone up or prove your worth to someone. Those agendas can sabotage your attempts. I cleared mine with Tapping and also bring conscious of it helped me to let go of them.  Using EFT can clear the blocks that create resistance to getting what you want as I discussed in  my post, Law of Attraction in Action: Use EFT (Tapping) to Clear Resistance.

When you stop tying your goals to needing to reach them to prove something or to validate your worth, or something else that has nothing to do with the achievement, you clear some of the blocks that the Law of Attraction will pick up on. It sure helped me! Respect yourself, even if others don’t. Own your efforts with pride. Don’t worry about what others think. As I said in yesterday’s post, Be the Master of You Fate and Captain of Our Soul. Let your passions and goals guide you, not a desire to make someone see you in a better light. See yourself in a good light so your vibration reflects that.


See all the posts in my Law of Attraction in Action Series HERE.
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