Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

Living with Regrets

Do memories of things yofireu did or didn’t do lead to self-recrimination? Do you wish you’d done things differently? All those things that you did or didn’t do in the PAST can haunt you today. I emphasized PAST because they happened already and are over. But if you keep the regrets alive in your memory then it’s not over. I hear regret about:

•    Letting someone who could have been the love of your life go
•    Staying with the wrong person for too long
•    Not getting the degree you really wanted to get the career you wish you had.
•    Saying something that ended a good friendship
•    Making a bad investment


How does thinking about these kinds of things make you feel? When I had many regrets I felt lousy thinking about them. Regrets usually have no positive benefits. They can also trigger guilt—another negative emotions that brings you down. Absorb and accept this:

Regret is like poison for your soul! It needs to be left in the past.

Studies show that the happiest people have the fewest regrets. Do you want to be happy? I want you to be! But it won’t happen if you live with regrets. To get rid of regret, try these tips:

•    Acknowledge what you did or didn’t do and that it bothers you. Don’t try to push it away and act like you don’t care because you do. Get in touch with your feelings about it.


•    Forgive yourself for doing what you regret. You were trying your best and it’s okay. You obviously had a reason for what happened. Remember what it was.

•    Remind yourself that you’re human. You made a choice that seemed logical or right or from your heart or because you were scared.

•    Write down all the ways you’ve gown since then. Take pride that you’ve learned.

•    Write down what you regret. Read it out loud and then say, “It’s okay and it’s over.” Then burn the paper.

If you regret something you can follow through on now, do it. Go back to school and study what you wanted. Go to law school—it’s never too late! Call the friend you regret losing. And then move on from the past. Letting go of regrets is a strong act of self-love. It will also free up your thoughts for more positive ones. And you’ll feel much lighter, which will allow you to be happier.


Join the Self-Love Movement™! Take the 31 Days of Self-Love Commitment and get my book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways for free at Read my 2013 31 Days of Self-Love Posts HERE. Join the Self-Love Movement™! on Facebook.

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