Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

Lessons from a Recovering Doormat


Are You A Doormat? Take the People Pleaser Quiz

Are you confused about whether or not you’re so much of a people pleaser that you’ve reached DoorMat level, or you’ve convinced yourself you’re just a nice person? Below is a quiz listing things you may do but don’t feel good about. Take this quiz every few weeks as you work on yourself and see if your score increases. Be honest. Write down your answers. Nobody will see your answers but you.

People Pleaser Quiz
Answer on a scale of 1-10, as to how like you are to do these. One is most likely. Ten means it’s absolutely not true.
1. I’d loan money to someone who already owes me.
2. I take phone messages, even if they don’t take mine.
3. I call people two or three times if they don’t return my calls.
4. If someone doesn’t call as promised, I call.
5. I make excuses to others for someone’s inconsiderate behavior toward me.
6. I make excuses to myself for inconsiderate behavior toward me.
7. If someone is inconsiderate or mean to me, I assume it’s my fault.
8. I’d rather treat a friend to dinner or a movie than go alone.
9. If I have a car I’d loan it to a friend.
10. I try to see good in everyone and ignore negatives.
11. Friends can always count on me, even if I can’t count on them.
12. I always worry about what others think of me.
13. It bothers me a lot when someone doesn’t like me.
14. I don’t stand up to people because I’m scared of what might happen.
15. I repeat the same mistakes, even if it hurts me to do so.
16. I hate saying “no.”
17. Being alone scares me enough to keep friends happy at my own expense.
18. I see myself as a wimp about dealing with people.
19. I respond to situations the way others want me to instead of how I’d like.
20. I don’t like myself.

Think about your answers and what you can do to get a higher score. Make an effort to work on empowering yourself and breaking old people pleasing habits. Take the quiz again in a month and see if you have any progress.
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