Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

Commit to Yourself for 2013

The New Year is coming. It’s a time to rethink your life and how you want to change yours. It’s also a time that you tend to look for what you can do differently in the next year. You might be considering how when 2013 arrives, you’ll be better able to reach your goals. Sounds good, right? But it won’t happen that way unless you commit to doing something very different. A calendar change will make no difference unless YOU change and make the difference.

It’s fun to make resolutions about what you’ll accomplish in 2013: Will you lose those pounds you’ve wanted to get rid of for ages? Will you finally meet the romantic partner of your dreams? Will you find a way to increase your income to a much higher number? Will you finally be happy? Declaring these things without a plan for how you’ll do make your life better will leave those resolutions in the dust shortly after January 1st, as the things that discouraged you in the past continue to be the same. There’s a better way to start the year that can facilitate your positive changes.

Loving yourself is touted in almost every self-help book and in many magazine articles. Yet it’s still in short supply. Building self-love can be much more effective than the New Year’s resolutions you make year after year while your life stays the same. There are many benefits for loving yourself, and you can read in my article, 10 Reasons to Love Yourself. Begin 2013 by committing to love yourself more! Loving yourself is the best motivation to do the things you need to do to achieve your goals. For example:

•    You may hate to diet and exercise. When you love yourself, you WANT to take better care of your body.  Every time you eat healthier and get some form of exercise, you say, “I love me!” Doing this for your well being instead of to look better for someone else is a much better motivation. Fitness and good health make you feel even better!

•    It’s frustrating to put a lot of energy into finding a romantic partner and come up empty. That leaves you feeling lonely, incomplete wondering if you’ll ever be worthy of receiving love. When you put that energy into loving you, you’re MUCH more like to attract love into your life. Love attracts love. Self-love makes you more attractive and enables you to know that you’re worthy of the love you give yourself, and get from others. Likes attracts likes!

•    Self-love increases confidence and motivates you to work harder on behalf of yourself. It radiates from you in ways that other people can sense, which makes a better impression than feeling desperate for a career opportunity that will greatly increase your income. Working form a place of self-love, instead of frustration, creates a powerful energy that resonates with those who could help you.

•     When you love yourself, you know it’s loving to set boundaries about what you say “yes” to and the behavior you’ll tolerate from others. You quickly learn that saying “no” to something you don’t want to do says. “yes” to you, which also says “I love me!” Self-love helps you accept that you need to give your own wants and needs priority—without guilt!

•    It’s hard to be happy when you don’t like yourself. I didn’t recognize how unhappy I’d been until I developed strong self-love. Self-loathing kills happiness. So does making others happy at your expense in an effort to buy acceptance and compensate for the flaws you see in yourself. Loving you—imperfections and all—can facilitate your self-acceptance, which builds inner contentment. That reflects in your attitude and helps you to feel an overall sense of happiness with yourself every day.

Self-love remains elusive for many people because they don’t know how to begin to build it. It’s harder if you don’t even like yourself. That’s why I, as director of The Self-Love Movement, created the 31 Days of Self-Love Commitment —a pledge to do something loving for yourself for the first 31 days of 2013. Instead of making empty resolutions, start the year by being kinder to self! The more you treat yourself with love, the more your self-love will grow. The more your self-love grows, the more you’ll be motivated to take good care of you! Commit to 31 days of self-love and hopefully it will motivate you to commit to a lifetime of love. You’ll get a lot more from doing that than making resolutions.

Join the Self-Love Movement™! Take the 31 Days of Self-Love Commitment and get my book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways for free at Read my 31 Days of Self-Love Posts HERE.

Please leave comments under my posts so we can stay connected.

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