Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

What makes you happy? Many people say lots of money or expensive things. Kids tend to reach for the biggest one of something, thinking bigger is better. Many of us still do that. We think more expensive or fancier is better and that having those kinds of things will make us happier. But often that belief is very wrong. If you’re not happy already, those things will just make a blip in your happiness that will wear off fast.

I meet many people who try to buy their way to happy. And many women who look to marry a guy with money so she can live in the style that she loves. They may not love the guy but love his money! That doesn’t feel satisfying in the long run.

Possession can soothe unhappiness but not build contentment or joy. Leora, a woman I knew grew up very poor in an unhappy family situation. She pushed to make a lot of money so she could afford to have lots of luxury in her life. She needed to do it to compensate for all her unhappy years. We never made plans to go out to eat because she refused to go to a restaurant that wasn’t super expensive. But one time she agreed to go to one of my favorite cafes. She couldn’t believe how much she loved the food and when the bill came, she almost fainted from the low cost.

Inexpensive things can be satisfying too. Even if I were a millionaire, you’d never get me to give up my favorite places to eat in favor of fancier ones. Leora learned a valuable lesson that day. After that she allowed me to take her to my inexpensive eateries! She still spent a lot of money but as I got to know her I saw that she was still an unhappy person. Buying the finest things soothed her but didn’t bring consistent joy. No amount of money can bring you the kind of happiness that sticks with you. That comes from inside.

Watch the video called Life Is Like Coffee. Check it out for a wonderful message related to what I just wrote.

Take the 31 Days of Self-Love Challenge and get my book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways for free at And you can post your loving acts HERE to reinforce your intention to love yourself. Read my 31 Days of Self-Love Posts HERE.

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