Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

We all have something we enjoy doing on our own. It can be reading a book, taking a bath, meditating, having a cup of coffee or tea, or a glass of wine in silence, take a walk, or a million other things. Whatever your pleasure is, schedule an hour to do it. I mean write it on your calendar, let anyone who might want to be with you at that time know that you won’t be available for that hour—few exceptions!

Honor yourself by honoring the time you set aside for you.

Yes, emergencies will come up that you can’t control. But someone wanting to see you isn’t one of them. If you take a bath or go into a room and close the door to do what you want, put a Do Not Disturb sign on the door. Even if you have kids or someone who’s ill. You need to make time for you  to do something in silence. Silence is calming. It can be very therapeutic if you allow yourself to have it without guilt.

When I visit a family member who has a house in the mountains, there’s always a lot of people around. I always insist on taking an hour walk, by myself. People always want to accompany me but I gently go solo. They don’t get it but that doesn’t matter. I get! And I need it! For me, walking in the mountain air, looking at the trees, doing deep breathing, is spiritual. I usually have a good talk with God on my walk.

Find the activity you enjoy doing in silence—and schedule an hour to do it—on your calendar! Even if you get arguments from people who want your time—spouse, kids, parents, friends, boss, etc. Stand fast! Take your hour! It’s a lovely way to say, “I love me!”

Take the self-love challenge and get my book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways for free at And you can post your loving acts HERE to reinforce your intention to love yourself. Read my 31 Days of Self-Love Posts HERE.

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