Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

Lessons from a Recovering Doormat


Law of Attraction in Action: Why Can’t I Make Myself Happy?

This is post 137in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to attract all that you need. I do it every day! Read all the posts in my Law of Attraction in Action Series to see how.

In my post, Enjoy Being Happy, a reader said that the harder she tries to find peace, self-love and happiness, the more she ends up with anger, frustration and dissatisfaction. She does know she wants those things but sees her life as based on struggling with feeling like she has too little time to take care of her obligations to others as it and feeling fat. She doesn’t see how she can make any more demands for things like self-fulfillment or self-appreciation.

I’ve written a lot about how the words you use attract your situation. She sees herself struggling, time-deprived and unable to attract the state of being she says she wants. I could feel her pain in the words she used. Pain attracts pain. Getting caught up in struggling feels awful. It makes you unhappy. And remember, the Universe responds to your emotions. No matter how much you say you want peace, self-love and happiness, feeling negative emotions about them keeps it out of reach. Negative emotions attract negative situations. Positive emotions attract positive situations.

Seeing life as a struggle reinforces your life as a struggle. Seeing it as challenges you can overcome helps you empower yourself to have a better life.

And she struggles to build self-love. That in itself is unloving! Peace, self-love and happiness are wonderful and promote positive emotions. Seeing them in a negative light—another struggle to achieve—will keep you from having them. Self-love is about treating yourself lovingly. It should NEVER feel like a struggle. The struggle is really getting out of your own way to allow love in.

When you see life as a struggle, it is. When you see life as a loving experience, it can become that way.

Self-love and struggle do NOT go together. Self-love feels good. I advise you to stop seeing having good in your life as another chore on you overfilled to-do list. Instead, commit to a short time each day to be kind to you. It can be as simple as taking a few minutes to do some deep breathing with your eyes closed, or take a short walk or take a guilt-free bath or read a book or something that makes you feel good, not that feels like a chore. Allow yourself to enjoy it during that time!

Take my self-love challenge and read my book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways which is free at http://howdoiloveme.com. And you can post your loving acts HERE to reinforce your intention to love yourself. Read my 31 Days of Self-Love Posts HERE.  If you really want to love yourself, the first loving act is to choose to love yourself. Once you do, commit to small acts of self-love. Let go of one obligation that isn’t mandatory to give yourself free time. Even if people expect it, saying “no” even once is saying, “I love me!” Here’s a short video I just made about self-love:

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See all the posts in my Law of Attraction in Action Series HERE.

Please leave comments under my posts so we can stay connected.



  • http://AddaURLtothiscomment Shannon

    Thank you for taking the time to help me with my problem. I have read, re-read and thought this through. The two points that shout out to me the most are 1) getting out of my own way and 2) that self-love is not part of a to-do list. I am enjoying my moments of self-love and keeping them simple. I am also enjoying the beauty in my life and day. I am giving up the struggle and am just going to enjoy instead of waiting for everything to be finished or perfect so that I can enjoy.

  • http://AddaURLtothiscomment Daylle Deanna Schwartz

    I’m happy to help you Shannon! And, I’m glad that you’re on a good path to be happy. : )

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