Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

Lessons from a Recovering Doormat


Redefining Love Life

Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for HowDoILoveMeCover.jpgToday is Day 28 of my 31 Days of Self-Love posts to celebrate Self-Love Month with suggestions for jumpstarting your own self-love.

When I see a friend I haven’t seen in a while, she often asks, “How’s your love life?” What she means is do I have a special guy in my life. We normally associate love life with romance. I did too until I got a fortune cookie that changed my perspective. Mind you, I normally don’t put much validity into the fortune inside a cookie after a meal in a Chinese restaurant. I read them out of habit and most of the time am disappointed to find a common saying instead of predictions of great things for me.

So I wasn’t expecting much when the waiter gave me my check with a cookie. I began nibbling it until I saw the little paper, which I pulled out and kind of glanced at. Then I tossed it onto the plate from my meal, not really putting much stock into it. But as what it said sunk in, I smiled and took it off the plate to read again:

Your love life will carry you through any circumstances.

My first thought was the typical one: I’m not currently seeing anyone special so I don’t have a love life to carry me through any circumstances. I know that’s what my single girlfriends would think. No big deal. Just a silly fortune with no meaning for me. “But wait!” I thought. Why am I skewing love life to just mean romance? And I smiled as the light bulb went on in my head.

I have a love life! It’s the love I give to me.

Romantic partners can come and go but I’m always here for me. I know what I like, want and need and do my best to make me happy. I’m not trying to minimize the blessing of having a healthy romantic partner in my love life. I’d be very happy to meet a man who increases my joy. But, when I do have one, he’ll be just a segment of my love life, not the while thing. I own first place! We all have the ability to give ourselves love, or withhold it, at any time. So does a romantic partner. But, we can control the flow of love we give ourselves. We can’t control what we get from others.

That’s why self-love should be the foundation of any love life!

 It’s common to make a romantic partner more important than yourself, but that doesn’t make it right. I am the most important love of my life. YOU should be the most important love of yours. That doesn’t take away from loving others too but does assure your place of honor in how you prioritize your needs and make sure you get enough happiness boosters. And, it assures that you’ll always be loved. Many people sacrifice their happiness to please someone else to feel loved. But, does that give you a real love life?

Self-love is the umbrella for loving others. The more love you give yourself, the more love you have to give. The more love you give yourself, the more love you attract, since self-love is attractive. The more love you give yourself, the more the Law of Attraction responds in kind. So self-love can help you get a well-rounded love life if you build it first.

Redefine the concept of love life to include self-love. Now when folks ask how my love life is I say “great!” They get confused if they ask who it is and I say I’m not seeing anyone special. It doesn’t matter what others think anymore. I had enough of that when I was a DoorMat and needed everyone to approve of me. Self-love motivates me to only need approval from me, and a love life based on self-love feels great to me! Build yours and watch it grow!

Take the self-love challenge and get my book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways for free at http://howdoiloveme.com. And you can post your loving acts HERE to reinforce your intention to love yourself.

Please leave comments under my posts so we can stay connected.



Previous Posts

Law of Attraction in Action: Making the Best of What Happens
This is post 281 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to manifest your desires.. I do it every day! Read all the posts in my Law of Attraction in Action Series to see how. Things don’t always go the way you planned or hoped for. That’s how life works. But wh

posted 12:01:35pm Apr. 22, 2014 | read full post »

Rewriting Elizabeth Barrett Browning
  Elizabeth Barrett Browning wrote How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I borrowed it for the title of the book I’m giving away through The Self-Love Movement™---How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways. To build self-love, it’s good to think in those terms. I suggest you rewrite

posted 12:01:25pm Apr. 21, 2014 | read full post »

Shutting Yakkers Up Nicely
Have you ever just wanted to be left alone but someone intruded on your space? When I was a DoorMat and someone talked my ear off when I wanted silence I’d just smile and let them go on and on. I’d get mad inside and feel frustrated at my inability to say what I was feeling—SHUT UP! I’d g

posted 12:01:09pm Apr. 18, 2014 | read full post »

A Wake Up Call
Can you easily recognize when it’s time to make changes in your life?  I’m thrilled to have Dr. Dain Heer as my guest today to give you suggestions for waking your consciousness. He travels all over the world facilitating advanced classes, workshops and seminars on Access Consciousness® and a

posted 12:01:58pm Apr. 17, 2014 | read full post »

Law of Attraction in Action: Assuming the Worst
This is post 280 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to manifest your desires.. I do it every day! Read all the posts in my Law of Attraction in Action Series to see how. When you’re going through a problem it’s easy to get worked up in a negative direction

posted 12:01:25pm Apr. 15, 2014 | read full post »




Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.