Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

Lessons from a Recovering Doormat


Practice What You Speak

Thumbnail image for Women_Sandals_4216.JPGFeng Shui has always interested me. It’s the art of arranging your apartment in ways that attract more of what you want and allow energy to flow freely through it. There’s a lot more to it and I wanted to learn more. I’ve always thought of Feng Shui as a system to get rid of clutter, and create order, which I try to do regularly. So when I saw a one night workshop nearby, I went to the woman’s website to see who the presenter is. I was quite surprised that her website was disorganized and out of date. The last event she had posted was in March and the one I was interested in wasn’t up.

It’s hard to take someone seriously who doesn’t practice what they speak!

While a website is different than an apartment, I expected someone who teaches you how to organize properly to have one that showed she was organized and professional. I changed my mind and decided I didn’t want to take a class from someone whose website didn’t reflect what she teaches. I’m uncomfortable with people who say one thing but whose actions say something different. It’s easy to shoot your mouth off about how much you do and how great you are at____.

But if what people see doesn’t support what you say, you come across as blowing hot air, or as someone that’s not the right person to work with.

I’ve had several house guests over the last 2 months. When each one arrived, I asked if they’d please be careful about leaving on lights and other electronics when they weren’t using them. I’m very careful about saving energy and feel strongly about it. My guests would forget sometimes and I’d have to remind them. They owned it and apologized, except for one. Every time I reminded Ms. X to please remember to turn off things she wasn’t using, she immediately responded with how much saving energy for the environment meant to her. And how she’s very conscious of it.

Words and good intentions mean little if the lights don’t get turned off!

Every morning I turned off the fan she used for sleeping, and the lights, since she wasn’t in that room, and reminded her that I was energy conscious. She immediately chimed in to tell me how energy conscious she is too. For days, the only time she turned off the light was for sleeping. Yet she made a loud point of praising herself for her energy consciousness, to the point of me wanting to scream–Why don’t you show me by turning off what you’re not using??!!

Many people talk a good game but the only real good game is the one someone acts on.

If you want to be known as someone trustworthy, don’t say something unless you’re prepared to show with actions that you mean it. The way you come across matters. If you tell me I should come to you for a haircut because you do excellent work and your own hair is a mess, don’t expect to see me! If you’re serious about finding a job, have a resume prepared so you can give it to someone who is interested in you. If you brag that you’re always on time, be on time!

Too many people talk the talk but sit down on the walk.

A good way to become more self-empowered is to be a person of integrity, who walks the walk. Doing so will instill pride, which helps to build good self-esteem. Of course things happen and I can’t always do everything I say every single time. But I do my best. My house guest didn’t do her best. She just said the words each time she was “caught” for giving empty words. As you strive to do your best and try not to say what you’re not prepared to walk on, you’ll feel more in control of your life in a positive way.

Please leave comments under my posts so we can stay connected.



  • Your Name

    It seems that examples mean more to me than words, although both are important.

  • Daylle Deanna Schwartz

    Yes, examples via action bring your words to truth.

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