Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

Lessons from a Recovering Doormat


Law of Attraction in Action: Energy

Thumbnail image for * LOA logo2.jpgThis is post 93 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to attract all that you need. I do it every day! Read all the posts in my Law of Attraction in Action Series to see how.

Do you spend time with people who leave you drained? Are you attracted to certain people because they make you feel good being in their company. I used to get calls regularly from people saying a version of, “I need a dose of Daylle.” I might not hear from most of them for ages but when things aren’t going well they’d turn to me. Then I’d feel worn out when I gave them my time. Someone explained that people are attracted to positive motivational energy and I was warned I could get sucked dry if I wasn’t careful.

People who are low on good energy will be attracted to yours and may try to feed off of it if you let them.

 The trouble is, if you’re not cautious, they will leave feeling energized and leave you feeling depleted. I never thought of it in those terms before. Now I’m more careful of whom I give energy to and set boundaries on my care-giving time. Often we don’t realize what other people’s energy attracts to us until it’s too late. Being in the company of someone who’s always down can make you feel down too. And tired.

I had a friend years ago who always had a problem. She’d call and ask how I was and I’d give her a big energetic GREAT! I knew the deal but had to ask back, how was she? It was always “Not so good” or “Everything is going wrong.” I’d try to change the subject quickly but her down energy left me drained by the time we hung up. Getting together in person was worse. While she was a lovely person, I had to let her go as a friend. Her negative energy attracted negative energy to me.

Friends who drain your energy or change it in ways that make you feel negative after interacting with them are friends that need to be cut loose or that you limit time with.

When you absorb their negative energy, the Law of Attraction picks up on it and brings you more negatives and you’ll feel more tired. Someone else’s drama can also rattle your energy and attract stuff you don’t want. I was reminded of this earlier in the week when I good friend who lives out of town arrived to conclude a big business deal. He was supposed to stay with a relative but there was a problem and it didn’t work out. He had no budget for a hotel so I reluctantly offered him my futon.

It was supposed to be just a few days but his deal took some turns and seemed like it would never close. Meanwhile, he was around a lot, wheeling and dealing on his phone, sometimes getting angry with a partner in the deal or expressing his frustration. I work at home and it began to drive me a bit crazy. I didn’t like being in my office space as it wasn’t conducive for writing. My sleep got erratic and I felt tired a lot. I know he hated how it affected me. He’s a very good friend, a very good person and tried his best to stay out of my way and not touch my stuff.

One can control their behavior but can’t control the energy they give off.

When what was going on made him feel down, he’d lay around in the futon just feet from where I worked. Then I’d feel down from absorbing that energy. Tuesday morning I came home from getting acupuncture and was in a mellow mood, until I walked in the door. He was having a loud argument with his biz partner. Then he made another call and ranted about what was going on. Within 5 minutes my nerves were shot and all the relaxation from acupuncture was replaced by the tension his energy gave off onto me.

I realized that I was absorbing his drama and problems from the energy he sent into my apartment and I was attracting the emotions he was feeling!

I always strive to live peacefully. That peace was gone and it was time to do something about it to get my peace, and my mojo back! So we had a talk. I told him he could sleep in my place at night but had to be out when I worked and no more loud phone calls. Once I took control, there was better energy in my place and my friend snapped out of his funk. As his energy improved, he got an email that his deal was almost done. I believe that the shift in energy attracted it. The timing was impeccable. I expressed determination to stop the bad energy, he caught my determination and it all worked out right after. He left that evening and I’m enjoying my solitude!

Be really carefully about what energy surrounds you and what you may absorb from people you interact with.

The Law of Attraction will pick up on the energy you absorb and you’ll begin to reap the benefits, if you’re with positive people, or be hurt if you absorb negative energy. How do you know what you absorb? Do a body check when you’re with someone who’s not positive. Are you tense? Tired? Drained? Depressed? Were you that way before? If not, you’re absorbing the person’s bad energy. It’s important for your happiness to avoid that when possible. Guard your energy against people who prey on it and those whose drama will latch onto you. You’ll be a lot happier if you do!

See all the posts in my Law of Attraction in Action Series here.

Please leave comments under my posts so we can stay connected.



  • Ginger

    WOW….while I knew alot of the other info..I have never known this before…VERY TRUE!…a little more difficult to practice when its your grown kids..nevertheless…still must be done somehow!

  • Lawrence Duncan

    How do you cut loose or limit time with when the person is someone you love? My girl freind, Has financial problems and I hear about them every day. Dam if i do, Dam if I don’t.
    I’m ready to let go but she’s the only woman I want in my life.
    I try and help in every way possilbe. But it doesn’t stop.She works,under paided But she’s there everyday.
    I just can’t walk away from her.She’d be homeless,she also takes care of her mother,Provides houseing with a morgage and houses brothers and nephew. I tell her things will get better but she doesn’t want to her me preach.

  • tealie

    For the last four years my luck has been sour.
    It appears that I am a magnet to bad luck….this bad luck resulted in major life changes….it appears to be getting worse.
    What advice can you give me.

  • Daylle Deanna Schwartz

    So true Ginger. Kids can really sap or hurt your energy and you MUST set boundaries with them.
    Lawrence, you are not responsible for your girlfriend, only for yourself. And, by making her your project, you enable her to stay in her ruts. She helps her family, she can help herself and live with one of them! She will NEVER change or make you happy in this situation, so it’s your choice to continue or cut her loose. Ask yourself why someone like her is the only woman you want in your life. I think it’s time for you to work on YOU!
    tealie–you attract what you give out. You expect bad luck and get it. I highly recommend you read all the posts in this series, especially the one on luck!
    I will address family boundaries in several posts later on.

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