Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

Lessons from a Recovering Doormat


Embracing SUCCESS series


I was delighted that SUCCESS magazine re-launched with the March issue, which was packed with articles on many people who’ve achieved success that motivate and stimulate new ideas. I love this magazine! Everything is about SUCCESS. Reading it is a constant reminder of going for your own. I applaud its publisher, Darren Hardy, for being innovative in bringing the magazine SUCCESSFULLY to life again. I’ll have samples from the magazine on Wednesday!

The magazine inspired me to launch my Embracing SUCCESS series. I want to explore what success is and different roads for reaching it. I’d hope to get it underway sooner but got delayed with some of my own successes and the crane accident I wrote about last week delayed me further. But now I’m back on track, which I consider a SUCCESS!

Over the next few weeks I’ll post articles that focus on some aspect of SUCCESS. Starting next week, each Wednesday will have an interview with someone who achieved SUCCESS by following his or her passion. Stayed tuned to this page as I update the schedule.

* Craig Newmark, founder of Craig’s List, the innovative site with free classified ads and much more
* Tim Westergren, Founder of Pandora, the fabulous, free website for creating your own radio stations for your listening pleasure.
* Patrice Tanaka, co-chair of CRT/tanaka and their “whatcanbe” ambassador
* Daniel Glass, Head of many major labels and founder of Glassnote Entertainment.
* Patrice Tanaka, co-chair of CRT/tanaka and their “whatcanbe” ambassador
* Lisa Lillien, founder of Hungry Girl.

I want to inspire you to go for your own SUCCESS—large and small!

I just accepted a deal for my ninth book, Nice Girls CAN Finish First, with McGraw-Hill. It will be out early in 2009 but my initial SUCCESS is right now! I’ll celebrate again when it’s out and again and again as it does well. But for now, I celebrate the deal, because that’s the first part.

Success has a variety of meanings, depending on who’s defining it. The dictionary defines it as an achievement or accomplishment. Yet many see it as other things. And many more people don’t recognize their achievements and accomplishments as success. When you look to what you still want instead of what you have, you miss out on the pleasure from having smaller successes. Feeling successful makes you feel good! It’s something to be proud of.

Yet it becomes elusive to many people, especially those who strive for perfection, which is impossible to achieve.

You can find a lot of success in your life if you learn to acknowledge it as such. It’s not just about the big things. Teensy, tiny things you do that you didn’t, or couldn’t, do before should be considered SUCCESS. Losing ten pounds is SUCCESS, even if you want to lose fifteen. Even one pound is one more than you lost before. When you celebrate every little baby step you take toward self-improvement, getting more of what you desire, etc., as SUCCESS, you’ll feel more self-appreciation and gratitude. SUCCESS gratitude attracts more successful endeavors.

Scoffing off the small stuff in pursuit of a bigger picture deprives you of the joy and motivation that acknowledging SUCCESS brings.

I invite all of you to send me your definition of SUCCESS, with a link to your site. I’ll include them in subsequent posts. I’ve invited other bloggers to share too. If you’d like to do a post on your site about SUCCESS, send me the link and I’ll add it to this page, whenever it comes in.

My general definition is: SUCCESS is every bit of progress you make on any level, and recognizing it. It’s living as the person you want to be and achieving goals with integrity; feeling content with your life and who you are; helping to improve the lives of others.

Here are some definitions from other bloggers so far:

“My definition of SUCCESS is reaching a point where I’m content with who I am. I’m getting there, but I know I still have a ways to go. In the meantime, I’ll seek out new experiences and challenge myself to do things out of my comfort zone. That’s the only way I’ll continue to grow as a person.” – Zandria at Keeping Up with Me. Having overcome her quarterlife crisis, she currently lives in Alexandria, VA, and recently signed up for a belly-dancing class. She also writes about fitness and issues affecting single women for BlogHer.com.

“To me success is an internal state of mind. It is my ability to be present in every moment, to experience all the pleasure’s that life has to offer, and to have a sunny vision of the moment we call ‘now’. My ideal way to spend ‘now’ is performing actions geared towards the greatest good of all.” – Alex Shalman at Discover Your Potential You

“Success is bringing quality into the very action you are taking right now. Quality means bringing the utmost care and attention into every action.” Albert at UrbanMonk.Net

My personal definition is: Earning a living doing what I love. Living by my passion. Facing challenges and overcoming them.

Become aware of your successes, large and small. To that end I’m listing some of mine here. Please join me and post your successes on your site. The more you list, the more appreciation you have for what you’ve accomplished. That leads to feeling more gratitude, which increases the blessings you receive.

My Own Successes
Leaving DoorMatville! Allowing ME to become a priority and learning how to take care of myself is a SUCCESS I live with every day.

Just accepting a deal for my ninth book, Nice Girls CAN Finish First, with McGraw-Hill. It will be out early in 2009.

Getting asked to do a th
ird edition of my Start & Run Your Own Record Label for Billboard. It has sold over 75,000 copies so far but my success is in knowing how many people it’s helped and that I can update it dramatically and help more people.

Each time I finish a run in Central Park—winter, summer, spring and fall—is SUCCESS. I feel especially successful when I manage to finish on a cold and windy day!

Every fan letter I receive, and I get them every day, telling me the person made an advance or was inspired by reading one of my books reinforces the SUCCESS of my writing.

Knowing that a woman in Tehran, Iran translated one of my books and though it was banned for publication, shares it with others who benefit from the lessons.

Cleaning my office. This is hard for me as I have so much going on. When I organize at least one area, it’s a SUCCESSful endeavor!

Each pound I lose is SUCCESS.

Starting and maintaining this blog!

Starting and maintaining this SUCCESS series.

Waking up smiling everyday. After forgetting how to smile as a DoorMat, each smile means I’ve come far.

Finishing a chapter in my book….Finishing part of a chapter….Finishing a paragraph. One section done to my satisfaction is a SUCCESS!

Being able to bench press, with perfect form, 35-pound dumbbells!

Turning down work, even if the money would be nice, because it’s not something I’m passionate about.

I don’t live as a DoorMat anymore!

Please make your own list and post it on your site!

So far these blogs have participated:

Lorraine at Powerfull Living posted What’s Your Definition of Success?

David at Slow Down Fast posted What Success Mean to You?

Albert at Urban Monk posted At Touch of Greatness and Success: A Different Definition.

Jordan at Jordan Cheng’s Success Journal posted Do You Need to Be Successful.

If you enjoyed my post, please leave a comment and/or click on the bookmark and write a short review at some of the sites, especially Stumbleupon and Digg. Thanks!

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  • Todd Barrent

    What a great idea Daylle! I always assume I know what success is. But I really don’t know what it is for me. I do associate it with more material things that for my inner purpose. I’m thinking now! I look forward to reading more!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/01445486103480238038 Daylle Deanna Schwartz

    Thanks Todd! I consider this a success for me. : )

  • Anonymous

    Hello Daylee! I found your blog from links the carnival page on all4women.com.au I really love your content and I had to subscribe. I love how positive and uplifting it is. My blog, Blessings from Above, strives to point out the wonderful blessings in our lives. I hope that it makes a postive difference for others the way your blog does.Check it out at: http://www.blessingsfromabove2.blogspot.com Looking forward to reading more of your work.Blessings!Denise

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/01445486103480238038 Daylle Deanna Schwartz

    Glad you found me and find my posts valuable. Your blog is very inspiring!

  • GMan

    Daylle, this is such a great idea! I’ve started my own list of successes! I look forward to more!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/01445486103480238038 Daylle Deanna Schwartz

    Hope you enjoy making your list Gman. It truly helps increase self-appreciation.

  • http://zandria.us zandria

    Thanks for including me! :)

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/01445486103480238038 Daylle Deanna Schwartz

    My pleasure Zandria!

  • Genaata

    I’m looking forward to reading the rest of the posts for this series. We all think we want success but aren’t aware of how we sabotage ourselves. I’m writing my own list of successes.

  • http://www.slowdownfast.com/blog David B. Bohl @SlowDownFAST.com

    Daylle,Thank you for the opportunity to contribute to this wonderful series! I’ve posted my contribution here: http://www.slowdownfast.com/blog/what-does-success-mean-to-you/David

  • http://jordancheng.net/ Jordan Cheng

    Hi Daylle,This subject hits home with me.I’ve been chasing success for a good part of my working life until recently.The wisdom which I found from the ancient Chinese philosopher Lao Tze is, real success comes from freedom in mind and spirit. Nothing from the material world should hinder the mind and heart from its boundless experience. To me, the first step to success is not to be mindful of whether I am successful or not. If I can defy any social labels and temptations of the material achievements, I can experience the boundless beauty of live. And that, to me, is success. I have a post that resonate well with this theme: Do You Need To Be Successfulcheers,Jordan Cheng

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/01445486103480238038 Daylle Deanna Schwartz

    Thanks for sharing Jordan! I agree that real SUCCESS is being able to flow with life in a happy and peaceful path, despite highs and lows.

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