Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

It was empowering to walk away from the Fashion Rocks concert. There were many celebrities there. Okay, I confess, I wasn’t going as a guest. A few weeks ago I was asked if I’d like to be a seat filler—someone who sits in the empty seat of someone on stage or other reasons a seat is empty.

I thought it would be fun to be a seat filler at an event like this. It probably would be for many folks. I don’t live far from Radio City and got there at 5PM. The event began at 8. It was packed. They began to push us closer and closer together on the street. It was warm and humid. I longed to return to the writing I left. I was on a roll. Did I want to wait in this throng of people for 3 hours just for the chance to get inside?


In the past I did what I was supposed to. I committed to doing this. And I was supposed to want to do this. But I didn’t!! I stood there wishing I could still be at home, happily writing. The cops pushed us closer together. I was sweating and not a happy camper at all.

Instead of thinking “what should I do?” I asked myself, “what do you want to do?”

Home baby! HOME! So I pushed my way through the pack of sweaty people and walked home, happily. I was excited to make a decision that felt good to me. We often think about what everyone else would want use to do when making decisions. When I was a People Pleaser I’d have never just done what felt good for me. Self-love has changed that!

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