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Jesus Needs New PR

Whether or not you believe in the literal existence of Adam and Eve, no doubt you have a mental picture of God’s first power couple! Long before “Brangelina” or “Bennifer,” the Bible tells us that God created “Adeve.”

And yes, they were good.

Or mostly good. Until they did bad…

But anyway, here’s how some people (famous and not-so famous) imagined what they looked like.

"Yes, it TALKED, Adam. I know that's hard to believe. But it did. Maybe if you'd talk to me once in a while, I wouldn't have been driven to chat with a snake! But it was nice to me. Told me I was pretty and stuff. You never tell me I'm pretty!" -Eve

"No, this is fine, baby. In my mind I pictured us a little closer, but this is cool for now." -Adam

"Uh, Adam, I have a feeling the serpent is back." -Eve

"No, you're cute, Eve. God had just told me that he was going to use my rib to create you, and you look a little more like my hamstring." -Adam

After they asked Jesus into their hearts, the first thing Adam and Eve did was go shopping. (Which is solid proof they were Baptists.) And then they began traveling around the Garden to other churches so they could share their story.

"See Adam? The tree is happy to see us!" -Eve

"Adam. ADAM. He's right behind us! Yes he's standing RIGHT behind us. Yeah, he's staring at us. And he's REALLY bright. No, YOU say something to him. No, you are going to talk to him, NOT ME! Why? WHY? BECAUSE YOU'VE KNOWN HIM LONGER THAN I HAVE!" -Eve

Look for Part 2 later this week!

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This is hilarious.

Before you complain about me using 75 percent of the slang word for poo, watch the video. I think you’ll wonder why I used the asterisk.

And this is why I have always turned down interviews with CBN, TBN, and the 700 Club.

More people should in my opinion. Do those types of shows sell books? Sure! Along with one’s integrity.

Found at Unreasonable Faith.

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Well… you’re a part of the problem according to Pastor Anderson. I know Pastor Anderson, not personally, but I know him because he’s the carbon copy of all the pastors, assistant pastors, AND school teachers at the church and school I grew up in. Pastor Anderson is sort of a YouTube sensation. Ever since he preached against men who sit down to pee, he’s garnered an online following…

In the following clip, he reveals why he hates community churches AND his hatred of American Idol

I do agree that this season of American Idol has been sinfully awful!

On a side note… if you can imagine this guy teaching you American History, then you can imagine what my American History class, taught by Mr. Davidson, was like…

Also… for a lesson on HOW TO SOUL WIN… watch this… AMAZING… lol

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