Jesus Needs New PR

Jesus Needs New PR

Crazy Archives

Christian couple proves Noah’s Ark was REAL (not really)

posted by mpt

Did you see those tigers? They look so real. Christian Nightmares found this! Christian couple proves Noah’s Ark was REAL (not really) is a post from: Jesus Needs New PR

Christian couple proves Noah’s Ark was REAL (not really) is a post from: Jesus Needs New PR


11 days until ‘Judgment Day’ (and I’m not laughing)

I’ve only mentioned this “End of the World” story once or twice on my blog. But now that End of the World is less than two weeks away, I thought it was time to mention it again. Why mention it […]


A fascinating exposé on 'Faith Healing'

Found at THIS fantastic new blog: Faith Palm


WHAT: Joel Osteen has never heard of Mark Driscoll?!

BrianD (<-great blogger, btw) blogged yesterday about a very interesting excerpt from Cathy Lynn Grossman’s USA WEEKEND feature on Joel Osteen: Ms. Grossman writes: …In Osteen’s sermons, bad times can be reimagined as opportunities. Someone left you? Lost your job? […]

There's something wrong with Pat Robertson

What the crap is Pat talking about? Poor Pat. Why doesn’t he just retire? Or why doesn’t somebody retire him? I don’t think he should be shot like a lame stallion. But he should leave broadcasting for good and perhaps […]

WHAT THE?! A Christian man plays with his snake in a tub (to explain sin)

Found at Unreasonable Faith!

Asteroids will destroy Earth!

And Pat Robertson can hardly wait! He’s on pins and needles waiting for this to happen. Heck, he’s even done the math and made all of the necessary calculations, and he is certain that it will be an asteroid that […]

Fundamental Baptist Pastor responds to 20/20 story

Wow. What an ass. Unreal.

Introducing the Killer Don Miller!?

Sent to me by Aran.

When Christians take Jesus's name in vain…

Found here.

The stupidity of some Christians is just mind-blowing (and sad)

This video has begun making the rounds… UPDATE: Here’s the girl’s YouTube page. SECOND UPDATE: She’s SATIRE?! I felt for it hook line and sinker.

Sarah Palin shows up in 'God's message' again and again and again…

Things get exciting and “spirit filled” around the 4-minute mark. Apparently the Greek word for again is ‘palin’… Oh oh oh boy. Via Dangerous Minds and American Jesus…

A spirit-filled dummy

Found at Christian Nightmare!

Does Christian propoganda like this really promote life?

Christian Nightmare is the ideal category for this video. PLEASE do not view this video if children are close enough to see or hear. I find manipulative videos like this to be the exact opposite of how “life” should be […]

UPDATE: Does this mean Anonymous beat Westboro?!

Clay sent this to me. I tried to go to Westboro’s site myself and got this message… So… maybe… just maybe Anonymous is winning 1 to nothing. Or Westboro is busy adding more hate to their blog. Time will tell… […]

Westboro Baptist Church responds to 'Anonymous'!

Thanks Joel for sending this to me! And as Joel commented in his tweet, somebody make some popcorn; this could be fun. You know, if I didn’t know better, I’d think that Westboro’s antics were satire.

'Anonymous' Hackers Unite Against Westboro Baptist!

Hacker-group “Anonymous” has issued the folks at Westboro Baptist Church a warning: Stop or else! Or else what?! Well, you can read their open letter to WBC for yourself… Open Letter to Westboro Baptist Church AN OPEN LETTER FROM ANONYMOUS […]

WHOA!! Our Favorite Crazy Preacher is Back With A New Video!

A Bliss Bash! I so want to (WHOA!) go to his (Pfft. Pfft. Pfft.) conference and see this (Giggity Giggity) insanity for myself. Toward the end of this commercial, he actually Cock-A-Doodle-Doos. But seriously, is this guy real? What is […]

Wait. The Holy Spirit Did WHAT?!

Wow. This clipping was Tweeted to me by Jonathan. And then I Googled the headline… and it seems to be real.

WARNING: Five Things Made by Satan!!!

Warning: This is post is pointless. POINTLESS!! Seriously… Yes, this is a post about absolutely nothing–pure satanic NOTHING. The following are 5 things I think Satan had a hand in making… 1) LINEN I hate linen. Why? Because I think […]

Josh McDowell's son uses fear, hate, & ignorance to teach kids how to 'love'

This manipulative/fear-filled video was sent to me by a youth pastor. He/she was sent this link by Interlinc, a non-profit that supposedly helps “youth ministries” become more successful. While the 1993 fear mongering tactics in this video don’t surprise me, […]

Why America Needs A Christian Dictator!

We Need a Christian Dictator Uploaded by OnKneesforJesus. – News videos from around the world. I wonder if he knows what any of those big words actually mean… Found at Dangerous Minds

Jesus Christ Vampire Killer!?

This is old. But it’s making the rounds…

Jesus is Everywhere (by @FunnyOrDie)

Jesus Is Everywhere – watch more funny videos

When does ‘Christian opinion’ become hate?!

A Christian anti-gay group in Chicago called Americans For Truth about Homosexuality has been added to several “Hate Group” watch lists. They do seem hateful. And completely misinformed. And tragically, full of fear… In the past, I’ve known Christians like […]

Lest we forget…

Don’t you love the word “lest”? Just a little bit? It’s so judgmental sounding without actually being judgmental…

Pat Robertson’s predictions for 2011!

Morality is screwed. Businesses are screwed. Families are screwed. Yeah, pretty much everything is screwed. Well, except 700 Club, CBN, and Regent University–all of that will prosper!! I’m serious. Two questions: How many times does somebody have to be wrong […]

Why is this Christian So (Crazy) Happy?

Because she thinks there’s complete and utter destruction is coming in May! And she doesn’t think she’ll be around for the celebration and calamity. Read the Washington Post story here. From Christian Nightmare.

Apocolypse Guru Rev. Tapley Offers You An Anti-Abortion Christmas Present!

Found at Dangerous Minds.

My Ode to 2010’s Christian Culture (the good bad & Driscoll)

There’s so much to say about 2010; the whos, the whats, the shenanigans So let’s look back one more time and remember the year in “Dr. Seuss” rhyme We all felt the earthquake in Porta au Prince, and then dear […]

‘Christians’ in Texas Execute Santa

The Christian group’s name is Repent Amarillo. You can Google them. I wonder if my friend Jason Boyett is a member? He lives in Amarillo. (KIDDING: He’s not a member. I promise.) Found at

This cute little kid is a racist (PLEASE DO NOT VIEW AROUND YOUNG CHILDREN)

This is disturbing on so many levels. Then again, I don’t know how real it is either… But if it is… wow. Found at Dangerous Minds.

Baptist Pastor asks, ‘Could you really respect me if I didn’t hate homosexuals?’

More bull…. shit… from Pastor Steven Anderson. Found at Christian Nightmares.

The prophesy of Barak Obama’s 12 stitches!

I promise not to make a habit of posting this crazy man’s videos… but this one is just too good not to post… It had me in… buh bUH BUHHHH…. stitches. Enjoy. Sent to me by Jimmy.

Oh. My. Gosh. Look what Kentucky is doing with $150 million dollars

It’s building an Ark! An Ark! An Ark! (Sing with me!) The Lord said to Kentucky, you’re gonna build an Arky Arky… Never mind. Anyway… yes, it’s true. According to the governor of Kentucky, plans are set for the Commonwealth […]

Happy Christmas: The Tribulation Has BEGUN! (oh, and the number 11 is gay)

William Tapley is crazy. In the first few moments of this video, you will learn… World War III started on November 23, 2010 The number “23” is EVIL. William has been looking for evil numbers. The number 11 is homosexual. […]

A Lord-praising Pig Puppet sings about demons (This is amazing!)

Casual conversation about demons is bad enough, but when the conversation comes with a melody and is sung by puppets, it’s truly inspirational don’t you think? Found at Everything is Terrible!

Watch this evangelist achieve the most satisfying, explosive, hot ANOINTING ever

Orgasm Anointing happens at .47… Oh oh oh my gosh… Found at Christian Nightmares.

Oh, the drama of this church drama

Wow. It’s starts off as a church drama and then ends up being an advertisement for the pastor’s book…


A church in Tulsa called “The Guts” (yes, the Guts) is currently featuring it’s annual Christian outreach called NIGHTMARE. Here’s the link to the promo…. But what was disheartening for me was watching the YouTube clips of those who experienced […]

Pastor & his wife sing a duet together in tongues

Found at Dangerous Minds.

R-RATED SERMON: This preacher hates semen!

So… when again is it over? Found at Christian Nightmare…

Would YOU Roll Around in Vomit for Jesus!? (TEEN MANIA IS INSANE-PART 2)

Unbelievable… …and psychotic…

Teen Mania is Insane (Part One)

Wow. This is the kind of church crap that makes me sick to my stomach. Mica, one the people interviewed in the piece, will be writing a post for in the next week or so… Visit Mica’s “My Teen […]

Possessed Pentecostals (Parts 1 & 2)

Not sure what they’re possessed by… but these people need healing. Somebody call Dr. Phil. Or Dionne Warwick. Wow. Pentecostals should consider making it a rule to not allow video recording equipment in their church buildings… And here’s part 2… […]

THIS. IS. HILARIOUS. Pastor’s wife has dream about Oral Roberts and a dancing elephant

Thank you Christian Nightmares. This is … I don’t know how to explain it. Just watch. But… YOU MUST WATCH UNTIL 2:59. I don’t want to explain. I wouldn’t know how to explain. Just watch. Wow. I’m still laughing.

The ‘Christian Osama bin Laden’

According to the Charlotte Observer… A Concord man was charged with describing how to make explosives, in an effort to bomb an abortion clinic, after FBI agents found instructions on the man’s Facebook page and caught him in a sting, […]

FUNNY & WRONG: A Fake Commercial for Burn A Quran Day!

Wow. Lord have mercy on humanity. Special thanks to my friend Christopher for sending this in.

MUST. SEE. Is this church being trendy or overly truthful?

Wow. Much gratitude to @hughlh for sending this picture to me.

WHAT DO YOU THINK? Did this pastor really go to Heaven?

Crazy Pastor Jesse talks about his visit to Heaven in the clip above (found at Christian Nightmares). The clip reminded me of snippet from a chapter called “Jesus® Will Make You Weird” from Jesus Needs New PR–you know, when Jesus […]

The injustice of ‘The Church’ in Nigeria…

Story by CNN reporter, Christian Purefoy… Just after midnight, the pastor seized a woman’s forehead with his large hand and she fell screaming and writhing on the ground. “Fire! Fire! Fire!” shouted the worshippers, raising their hands in the air. […]

Christians trying too hard (or not hard enough)

Indoctrinate your child in five days!

Warrior Prince Academy from on Vimeo. Princess Prep Promo New from on Vimeo. Yuck. I’m gonna have nightmares. Would you send your child to a camp like this? Thank you Michael for the heads-up. Found here.

You don’t need a pill. You need JESUS.

Oh my. This is just awful. Stay on your pills, people. There’s enough crazy people posting at my blog… (don’t make me stop taking my Adderall. You wouldn’t like me off Adderall.) Found.

Purchase Jesus in marble for $21 Million

See Jesus? Well, he’s there! And according to the ad on… THIS IS NOT A HOAX! “JESUS IN THE MARBLE”, A PRICELESS MODERN DAY MIRACLE! (Looks like cracks in a wall to me. Sure, I see “Jesus,” but I […]

SLAIN IN THE FLESH? This is one affair I can’t believe…

SOURCE: Paula and Benny?! Seriously. This has to be a rumor, right? It has to be. Why? Well… Paula isn’t blind. And if she was, Benny would heal her and then wish he hadn’t. Because being slain in the spirit […]

Future Koran-burning Pastor strikes again (on CNN!)


BAD NEWS: Baby drowns after baptism (PG13)

SOURCE: A priest in eastern Europe has been accused of drowning a baby boy as he baptised him. Police are investigating Father Valentin for accidential homicide after witnesses at the ceremony said the priest did not cover the baby’s mouth […]

A Florida church plans ‘International Burn a Koran Day!’ for September 11

Meet Jesus-loving Terry Jones. The Florida man is the pastor at Dove World Outreach Center and he’s also the author of the book Islam is of the Devil. Well, Terry is having a world-wide anti-Muslim party on September 11, and […]

Church offers prizes for winning souls for Jesus

Found at Stuff Fundies Like.

This is why I was afraid to go see a therapist…

Finding this video at Stuff Fundies Like was timely. In a couple of the chapters in Good God, I write about my decision to seek professional help in regards to my depression and anxiety. That was a very difficult step […]

Jesus will make your body hot (and skinny)

Oh. no. Found. Sent to me by Derick.

Judgment Day set! Buy an RV.

Evangelist attempts to bind demon from using Facebook!

Here’s the message enlarged…

WHAT THE? Jesus makes the cover of PLAYBOY!

In Portugal. Not in the U.S. Okay? Now breath… Again, I repeat: Jesus is on the cover of Playboy IN PORTUGAL. I don’t want anybody to hyperventilate or have a heart attack. You can rest easy knowing that America’s Jesus […]

‘I Can Only Imagine’ played backwards reveals evil message?!

It’s crazy that people still do this stuff. And why do all songs played backwards sound like Bjorke songs?

INSANE: Are you a ‘godly disciplined woman’?

This is the kind of “women” that my childhood church liked for our moms to be and the young ladies to become. Oh, and my pastor was friends with this jackass. QUOTE: “It bothers me when I see a man […]

PROPHESY ALERT! BP Oil spill is related to the death of Oral Roberts (this is not a joke)

Pastor Cindy Jacobs tells us his theory as to why the oil spill happened. And you’ll never believe this, but according to him it’s related to the death of Oral Roberts. Yes, the same Oral Roberts who is famous for […]

Holy Spirit gets help from Christian biker to turn over tables in church

Poor guy. Glad he didn’t get hurt! Sent to me by @Justinmcroberts

Reason #70,357 why Christianity is weird

“Hi, my name is Nighttime. And I can see you…” So frightening. My friend Jason Boyett wrote recently about his “Guardian Angel” fears. Do you believe in guardian angels? Do you believe each of us has one assigned to us? […]

A MUST SEE! Faith healer gives a woman a hip replacement!

This is hilarious. Thanks Jennifer for the heads up.

10 minutes of Hell (A video presentation!)

On two separate occasions, I participated in one of these “Hell” haunted houses. Talk about embarrassing. Wow. So not Christian. Like Daniel over at Unreasonable Faith writes, this stuff is “manipulative and pathetic.”

Is this bumper sticker the new Jesus fish?!

“Saw this sticker on a car’s bumper today! Right next to a ‘Jesus fish’!” -A blog reader Would you display this on YOUR bumper?

God, I mean Glenn Beck, is releasing a new book! (the book’s trailer features ‘God’)

See? This right here is proof that… 1) God is a fan of marketing human crap. 2) God lends his voice to a lot of movie trailers, too. 3) God will help anybody. Found at Dangerous Minds!

‘Jesus is Better Than Football’ – A Worship Song

Aw, Lutherans are so darn cute when they try to be relevant. My favorite lyric… “Peyton’s got that comeback zing, but Jesus is the comeback King! Third and long, he rose again! So let his people shout and sing!” TOUCHDOWN! […]

So this is what the Holy Spirit does…

I wonder if the Holy Spirit should be blamed for this, too… Found: Christian Nightmares.

One puppet, fake legs, & a song by the Monkees = A strange trinity

Christian Nightmares found it first!

You learn something new about Satan everyday… (pass it on!)

It must be the “lesbian” part that makes this book for adults only, because I learned in Sunday school that books about Satan are for everybody! Sent to me by Kevin!


Hold hands with Jesus and then go skateboarding. Yes! Silly Hindus; statues are for LOSERS and Catholics. Hmm, I think this is called the King Solomon method… READ the entire RETRO list over at the blog Pleated Jeans…

Do you attend a ‘community church’? YOU’RE A PART OF THE PROBLEM!

Well… you’re a part of the problem according to Pastor Anderson. I know Pastor Anderson, not personally, but I know him because he’s the carbon copy of all the pastors, assistant pastors, AND school teachers at the church and school […]

Bill Maher hates even nice atheists

For somebody who doesn’t believe in God, he certainly is consumed with hating “God.”

Could you love thy neighbors if thy neighbors did this?

I found this over at Unreasonable Faith. At first, I thought the note below was a joke… and a funny a joke. But then I clicked on the link provided and found out it was real. And the “note” even […]

VIDEO: Song about Heaven causes man to jump headfirst into baptistry

Sent to me by Brent!

Slayer Goes to Church! A MUST SEE.

The ‘Saved’ version of Justin Bieber’s ‘Baby’ (It’s called ‘Jesus’)

Thank Crazy Christian Clips for the find.

Cage fighting for Jesus? The Daily Show reports.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart Mon – Thurs 11p / 10c <td style='padding:2px 1px 0px 5px;' colspan='2'God Smacked Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Tea Party

INSANE: Pastor screams and heals AIDS patient!

This woman screams more than the pastor at my old church screamed. And it sounds like she specializes in healing people of STDs. And tumors! So make sure you take your portable MRI machine to church with you. Just insane. […]

Introducing Christoga! Yoga filled body; Christ filled soul…

Found at Everything is Terrible.

FYI: Joel Osteen’s Saturday night church service won’t give you AIDS, says member!

When asked, “What are guys like you doing at church on a Saturday night?” one man answers, “You don’t get AIDS here.” Oh, and you can hear a clip of Joel’s sermon, which I think is the only sermon he […]

The worst Christian t-shirts ever?

Found at! Visit this link for a list of the SIXTY worst Christian t-shirts EVER! A great post.

‘Father Abraham’ goes hip-hop! (right arm, left arm, right foot)

This reminds me of a 90s workout video with Eric Nies from MTV’s “The Real World.” Remember Eric? All of his sentences began with the words “Listen,” “Whatup,” and “Yo.” Found at CN!

Praise the Lord with THIS flower!

Flower Power is back! And rather than focusing its attention on peace signs and Mother Nature, it’s turned its floral attention toward Jesus! EVERYBODY SING! “Turn your flower upon Jesus… “ I’m not sure about you, but I’ve always wanted […]

Holy Spirit, seizure, or orgasm? You decide.

This is painful to watch–for many reasons. Found at Abraham Piper’s blog, 22 Words.

THE REAL SMURFETTE? How to worship Earth on Earth Day! (PG-13)

EARTH DANCER OF THE EARTH! from Everything Is Terrible! on Vimeo. Perhaps Chris Tomlin could learn a thing or two from this woman. Found at Everything Is Terrible

Rush Limbaugh says that God hates our new health care bill

FOUND HERE: “You know, a couple of days after the health care bill had been signed into law Obama ran around all over the country saying, “Hey, you know, I’m looking around. The earth hadn’t opened up. There’s no Armageddon […]

Joseph & Mary go on Maury Povich! (I’ll get letters for this one.)

Blame Daniel for posting this one and allowing me to find it.

The theology of hair? (yep, hair has a theology!)

One of my new favorite blogs is Stuff Fundies Like, which is where I found the above video. Does your hair have a theology? This video is hilarious.

When your pastor preaches bullsh*t

“You gonna die when God tell you to die,” says the preacher in the above clip. That’s an exact quote. And then he proceeds to tell the female members of his congregation to stop worrying about the lumps in their […]

Another Jesus sigh-ting (in a tie-dye shirt)

Hmm… Honestly, I think the man who sees “Jesus” looks more like “Jesus” than the image on the t-shirt. I think it looks like Skeletor.

Previous Posts

Juve mira contratação de meia e zagueiro para a próxima temporada
Com o titulo do campeonato italiano já assegurado, a Juventus já está pensando em reforçar a equipe para a próxima temporada e o setor do meio campo é o principal alvo da 'velha senhora'.De acordo com a imprensa italiana, para a parte ...

posted 9:19:00am Apr. 29, 2016 | read full post »

Mundo da bola: Destaques da semana
Juventus tenta acelerar acerto com meia português, após interesse inglês no jogador A Juventus está muito perto de encaminhar a sua primeira contratação para a próxima temporada, mas o clube terá que enfrentar uma forte ...

posted 8:35:00am Apr. 28, 2016 | read full post »

Hummels confirma que pode deixar o Borussia, e Bayer pode ser destino
Mats Hummels parece pronto para deixar o Borussia Dortmund no final da temporada com o Bayern de Munique é mais um clube a se juntar aos gigantes europeus na corrida para contar o defensor na próxima época.O jogador de 27 anos, que tem sido ...

posted 2:25:00pm Apr. 23, 2016 | read full post »

Notícias da semana - os principais destaques do mundo da bola
Real e Bayern de olho em Harry Kane Harry Kane continua atraindo o interesse de Real Madrid e Bayern de Munique para a próxima temproada, depois de liderar a luta pelo título do Tottenham.Kane é o artilheiro da Premier League nesta temporada, ...

posted 8:34:00am Apr. 19, 2016 | read full post »

Barcelona já prepara limpeza no elenco
O Barcelona sofreu uma derrota dolorosa contra o Atlético de Madrid pela Liga dos Campeões e o técnico Luis Enrique já possui uma lista de jogadores que devem deixar a equipe catalã na próxima temporada, de acordo com a imprensa ...

posted 8:25:00pm Apr. 14, 2016 | read full post »


Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.