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Jesus Needs New PR

Church Archives

Church sign of the day!

Photo by Kelsey.


Watch this evangelist achieve the most satisfying, explosive, hot ANOINTING ever

Orgasm Anointing happens at .47… Oh oh oh my gosh… Found at Christian Nightmares.


‘Social juctice is the exact opposite of Jesus’ says @GlennBeck

Found at Christian Nightmare.


How to plant a church!

This is hilarious… Sent to me by Jay Caruso. (Check out Jay’s photography blog.)

How to convert an atheist (It’s so EASY!)

Yep, watch the video above and learn how to convert an atheist to an agnostic. It’s really easy; you just have to draw a few circles. (I could do that.) Who knew it was so easy? Of course, couldn’t atheists […]

Asia’s Jesus Camp?

Hmm. A room full of children crying, shaking, and seemingly scared for their lives can mean only one thing: Jesus is there. Or it’s payday at a Walmart factory. Found at Unreasonable Faith.

Church Sign of the Day (I bet your pastor can’t do this!)

Sent to me by Andrew the Poet.

AMAZING: David Crowder Band’s New Music Video ‘Shines’!

Oh, the drama of this church drama

Wow. It’s starts off as a church drama and then ends up being an advertisement for the pastor’s book…

How To Win Souls!

Found at Stuff Fundies Like.

Go to church with jerks (in Texas!)


A. W. E. S. O. M. E. Wish there was an “i” in awesome; I so feel like dotting something. So… will there be cheerleaders in heaven? Found at Christian Nightmares.

I Want This Woman To Come Dance At My Church!

Bless her heart. And what the pastor does is priceless too… Found at American Jesus.

The Identity Conference: WHOA. Iggity. Iggity. WHOA!

Yay. A fat PeeWee Herman is doing a conference–WHOA–in Alabama about Jesus. You wanna go? WEEEEEEEEEEEEE You sure? Pfft. Pfft. Pfft. We could go together…. Whoa, I mean, wow. Found at Christian Nightmares.

THIS is What Happens When Church Gets Naked With State!

Rick Scarborough of Vision America has written the following letter to pastors! (For those pastors who can’t read, he reads it for you in the video above…). The letter is a pleading to pastors to preach politics from the pulpit. […]

One Way To Promote Ed Young’s Menz Conference

The man in these videos is Pace. He works for Pastor Ed Young (You remember Ed, right? Of U.B.U. fame?). A friend tells me he’s Ed’s “right hand man.” And I’m sure there are some days when he’s Ed’s “left-hand […]

WHAT THE? This Might be the Oddest Church Drama Ever

There’s probably some context that we’re missing, but honestly, context might make it worse. Found at Christian Nightmares!

Church Appreciation Video (Set to ‘Empire State of Mind’)

Let’s Hear it For Bay Shore (Music Video) from Andrew Mason on Vimeo. Found at Church Crunch. And sent to me by Chris.

Church Sign of the Week!

I don’t have proof that this is a real sign. But it seems real. It doesn’t make enough sense to be fake. Sent to me by Aaron!

The New Face of Evangelicalism?! An ABC News Report


A Modern (Psychotic?) Mary Magdalene

This is very interesting. It’s a little odd in spots… and compelling in others… but overall I think it’s a provocative concept, one that at least is creative and thought-provoking… What do you think about it? What are your thoughts […]

THIS DOG PRAYS! (This owner teaches his dog to pray.)

Wow. On one hand this is cute and cuddly. But then there’s a weird factor to it too. So do you think the dog’s owner is single or married? I’m guessing single. And according to him, it’s probably by choice. […]

The Curse of the Sexual Innuendo once again STRIKES Oral Roberts…

It’s crazy to think that life and culture was once so innocent, so pure, so holy that a preacher named Oral could put this picture on the cover of his magazine with the headline “Get Under the ‘Spout’ Where the […]

Church Sign of the Day

You first. Thanks to Chris for sending this photo.

A Woman Really Enjoying Church (like REALLY enjoying it.)

God or a full moon… you decide. Found at Christian Nightmares.

Redneck Christianity?

What’s not normal about gutting a 41-pound fish and chatting about your sinful nature? Found at Stuff Fundies Like.

Church Men’s Retreat (a commercial)

Hilarious. Found at American Jesus.

When the light of Christ isn’t quite enough… Neon Christianity!

Holy Cheating (an excerpt from “Good God”)

The following is a short excerpt of my next book, Good God: Why Embracing the Questions, Hope, and Punch Lines of Our Faith Helps Me Believe. The first draft of the manuscript has been handed in, and I’ll begin rewrites […]

God whitens teeth, says evangelist

According to Evangelist Joshua Mills at says he was recently preaching in New Zealand when a woman began smelling the minty-fresh fragrance of toothpaste. And the woman was like, “What? Why in the world would I be smelling toothpaste?!” […]

Cue the biblical conspiracy theorists!

According to The Daily Beast… Barak: Israel Willing to Split Jerusalem We’ll believe it when we hear it from Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu: Israeli Defense Minister and former Prime Minister Ehud Barak tells Haaretz that his government is willing to […]

A different kind of holy war…

I read the following editorial in Nashville’s City Paper. It’s a piece written by Teddy Bart about a Catholic Priest who is a friend of his who is apparently known for causing a ruckus in the Catholic Church… Apparently the […]

A song of prophesy just for you…

Can somebody interpret this for us? Found at Christian Nightmare

The injustice of ‘The Church’ in Nigeria…

Story by CNN reporter, Christian Purefoy… Just after midnight, the pastor seized a woman’s forehead with his large hand and she fell screaming and writhing on the ground. “Fire! Fire! Fire!” shouted the worshippers, raising their hands in the air. […]

A pastor illustrates 90s ‘worldliness,’ while his church laughs

The Prop Comic Preacher from Airwave Ranger on Vimeo. Found at Everything is Terrible

Reason 735,893,802,001 why Trinity Broadcasting Network needs healing

After learning about David’s story, I felt like I needed to retract this post. I didn’t know who the preacher was. To those who explained David’s experience, thank you for giving me the heads-up. I apologize if this post offended […]

A pastor’s Sunday morning routine (prepping for ‘game day’)

Found at American Jesus.

Awesome church signs!

All but one of these pictures were taken by my friend Nate Drye.

The REALITIES of Hell!? A sermon.

For fourteen years, nearly every single Sunday, this sermon was preached at my church. The sermon’s title was different, but the content was the same. This week I’ve been writing about what I believe to be true in regards to […]

Mormonism in animation!

I have no idea how true the facts are in this video… Though I’ve heard some of these stories all my life. Mormon beliefs make Christian beliefs seem almost “normal.” (Hello? Some Christians believe in a talking Donkey.) But true […]

A 90s FLASHBACK: A Bible Prophesy Scare Video!

NEW AGE ATROCITIES! from Airwave Ranger on Vimeo. Found at Everything is Terrible.

The ugly ‘details’ of a gay exorcism

This story from last month’s Details magazine broke my heart. Deliverance: The True Story of a Gay Exorcism by MATT MCALLESTER The prophet had come up from Georgia. She stood at the front of the Holy Ghost Temple Church and […]

Pee your pants in Jesus’s name…

Religion doesn’t fail!

Wow. Picture taken by @MarketerMikeE

Is your church as cool as The Cool Church?

There’s a church (I think it’s in Arizona) known as The Cool Church. And they sponsor the traffic and weather. Here’s a video from The Cool Church’s pastor, Mr. David McAllister… it’s about quicksand. Is your church a cool church, […]

Uh, about @RickWarren’s tweet…

So this afternoon Rick Warren–you know, Good Morning America‘s pastor–tweeted the following message to his followers… I challenge any church in America to match the spiritual maturity, godliness & commitment of any 500 members of Saddleback. YES! YES! YES! (NOTE […]

HILARIOUS: Stephen Colbert celebrates the ‘new Catholic image’!

The Colbert Report Mon – Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c Pope’s Baseball Cap & CatholicTV<a> Colbert Report Full Episodes 2010 Election Fox News Best line: “It’s like the guilt is coming right at me!”

Pastor tells reporter, ‘Put me in a rubber suit for Jesus’!

Oh my. So do you think the pastor is getting arrested?

What can a 4-inch tongue do? This church sign offers the answer.


How NOT to Win the Best Christian Attitude Award by @RachelHeldEvans

This post is written by my friend Rachel Held Evans. (She’s amazing–great writer, thinker, and storyteller!) Rachel’s first book–Evolving in Monkey Town: How A Girl Who Knew All the Answers Learned to Ask Questions–released last month, and it is wonderful. […]

Tenn. pastor offers reasons (with wisecracks!) why women shouldn’t be ministers

Unbelievable. This is a hot button issue for me. So forgive me for becoming so opinionated. But seriously come on. Why are we still discussing this issue? It astounds me that some church organizations still discriminate against women being in […]

OIL INTO WHINE? Churches along gulf hoping to share in BP payout (What do YOU think?)

This is a guest post by my friend Mike Loomis. Find out more about him at his blog. The oil spill in the gulf is horrible. Period. The ocean, wildlife, and coastline will be affected for years, maybe decades. Untold […]

Music ministers can be so passive agressive…

…and closeted. But qualified. Found at Matthew Smith’s blog.

Mark Driscoll (@pastormark) talks frankly about his love of men (in cages)

This is awesome. A little dated (3 months…) but still, awesome. Thank you Mark. Love you. Meet me in a cage next week? Just make sure you leave your balls at home, man. But you can bring your bat. Cool? […]

Kids who sing in church…

As some of you read in Hear No Evil, I sang in church as a kid… Did you sing in church?

‘Lord Spice’ commercial (thank you @timschraeder & @rfbryant)

Wow. Wow. Wow. The tickets-turning-into-salt-and-light is AWESOME. Why? Can I just ask that… Why? But thankfully, this commercial was made BEFORE Old Spice did its huge online campaign last week. That makes this a little better. Just a little… Nah, […]

A church where even Jesus gets buzzed

I’ll have what Jesus is having.

People who speak in tongues speaking in tongues

My friends over at Christian Nightmares found this video. It’s a four-minute clip of Koreans speaking in tongues in Korean. I realize that makes no sense, or maybe it does make sense and it just sounds weird to me. Maybe […]


Wow. I don’t know who created (or manipulated) this picture of Jesus. And I don’t know why. But I think it makes a very good point. The Christian faith often gets presented like it’s a Happy Meal with a toy […]

Please don’t let this trophy happen to your child

Way to go, Kayli! Looks like you’re the 3rd best Bible bringer in your church! Doesn’t it feel awesome to be so much better than all but two of the other kids in your Sunday school class? And check out […]

I bet THIS makes you want to get up and go to church, huh?

Louisiana’s Official Church Checklist

Dear Louisiana residents, Please don’t show up for church on Sunday unprepared… remember to… Bring your Bible. Bring your notepad. Bring your highlighter. Bring your handgun.

A third slice of America’s Jesus! (the APOSTROPHE edition!)

“JESUS” etched into one’s forearm. Ouch. Out of my momma’s womb and then circumcised! Just. Like. Jesus. Way too easy. Died on the cross for my sin’s what? MY SIN’S WHAT? I need to know. Righteous. Possessive much? Seriously, sport’s […]

The Great Tribulation happened in the 1970s (PG-13)

This movie was my great tribulation when I was 2nd grade… I still cringe and feel uncomfortable seeing this final scene… (Please don’t let your kids watch this clip.) Now, I believe this movie depicts fiction.

Today’s Good News: You’re likely going to Hell!

Continuing his “I’ll be honest, will you?” series, Pastor Tim Conway tells his congregation that even some of them will be going to Hell. Found at Christian Nightmares.

CONFESSION: Sometimes I e-ssume

A few years ago I received an email from Dr. Stephen Arterburn asking me if I’d be willing to fly out to California to join a small group of authors to discuss a new project that he was dreaming up. […]

Nashville’s ‘MOST DYNAMIC CHURCH’ to celebrate the 4th with BANG and BULL!

Oh beautiful for spacious skies, for amber waves of grain… I don’t know about you, but I love that old Gospel song. I call it my Amazing American Grace. As a Christ-centered Patriot redeemed by the red, white, and blue […]

This lady has a very special book that she wants to tell you about… (

I love this lady. She’s just so cute. And she makes me smile. She does. She really does. I’m smiling now. Yes, her delivery is as dry as sawdust. And too, if left to only this video presentation, I’d think […]

How would you respond to this church’s sign?

Do you agree?

The mutha load (this is a true story about pantyhose and parenting)

I was raised in a church that defined a part of a woman’s holiness based on whether or not she wore pantyhose. My family would be on our way to church. Panic would strike my mother’s face. “Virgil, I forgot […]

Is it unbiblical for moms to work full-time outside of the home? (John Piper & I respond!)

Comments are now closed. Yesterday, Daniel over at Unreasonable Faith quoted some of John Piper‘s answer to this question: Is it biblically acceptable for a mother to hold a full time job outside of the home? It can be. It […]

Holy Spirit gets help from Christian biker to turn over tables in church

Poor guy. Glad he didn’t get hurt! Sent to me by @Justinmcroberts

What would YOUR Psalm 23 say?

The Lord is… my mechanic my plastic surgeon my yoga instructor my president my lover I shall not want? He maketh me to lie down… in a house with three screaming kids on a stage in front of thousands on […]

SNL’s ‘Church Lady’ killed by Christians!

DANA CARVEY IS ROLLING OVER IN HIS GRAVE! found at Everything Is Terrible! on Vimeo. What sort of person sees this video and says, YES! I want to watch (or attend, whichever the case) ‘Shower of Power’ every Sunday morning! […]

I can’t believe it’s not Jesus!


‘If I were a woman’ a sermon title

Picture found at Christian Nightmares Thoughts?

Jesus is having a party! Have you been invited?

Do Sunday School teachers still hand out these invites to students or are they delivered by email now? We don’t have Sunday school at Crosspoint.

A newly released excerpt of Churched! (Read & Share!)

It’s official, Churched hits stores in paperback today. BUY IT HERE! If you haven’t read Churched, here’s a previously unreleased excerpt for your enjoyment. And if you would be so kind to spread the word for me, that would be […]

If you read one book this year… read this one.

Please read Mere Churchianity. It’s the first and only book by Michael Spencer (“The Internet Monk”). Michael died of cancer a few weeks back. BUY THIS BOOK. AND THEN READ IT. You will thank me. Here’s what I wrote for […]

JESUS ON FIRE! (11 seconds of famous Jesus statue burning)

Touchdown Jesus is no more. It burned down last night after being hit by lightning. The story is here. **UPDATE** There will be a second coming! Of “Touchdown Jesus.” Yep… the church’s electronic sign had a simple message flashing Tuesday […]

Pat Robertson offers AMAZING advice to woman whose husband flirts with other women

Anybody know if/when Pat is planning to retire? I hope he doesn’t still drive a car. Found at Christian Nightmares.

‘Jesus is Better Than Football’ – A Worship Song

Aw, Lutherans are so darn cute when they try to be relevant. My favorite lyric… “Peyton’s got that comeback zing, but Jesus is the comeback King! Third and long, he rose again! So let his people shout and sing!” TOUCHDOWN! […]

School of Christian Rock? (HILARIOUS!)

Found at Christian Nightmares! And CN is also the ones who made the connection between Pino and Jack Black…

Friday’s Person You Should Know!

Forgive me for missing this last week. My family was in town driving me crazy. Just kidding. Okay, so I’m mostly just kidding. Anyway, this week’s person you should isn’t famous and she’s not an un-famous artist or author marketing […]

Male children of the 80s, rejoice!

The second coming of Thundercats will happen in 2011. I know this has nothing to do with Jesus or church or faith… oh wait, it sort of does have something to do with faith. Because I wasn’t allowed to watch […]

8 BENEFITS of being Christian (with pictures!)

Think about it; why would you live like THIS… When you could live like THIS… Amazing, huh? It’s possible. All you have to do is become a Christian! Look! The girl in the picture above is even copyright protected. And […]

McDonalds launches ‘Come as you are’ campaign in France

Hmm, “Come as you are” would make a good church campaign, huh? Just as long as it doesn’t include a Big Mac.

One puppet, fake legs, & a song by the Monkees = A strange trinity

Christian Nightmares found it first!

A prayer request…

This request comes from my friend Crystal Renaud. Please pray for my friend Amy… On Sunday, May 23, Amy Wooddell suffered a stroke and underwent 7.5 hours of surgery to remove the clotting in her basil artery. Additionally they found […]

FAITH LIKE A CHILD! I really hope this kid writes a memoir someday…

Seen first at Christian Nightmares.

Do you attend a ‘community church’? YOU’RE A PART OF THE PROBLEM!

Well… you’re a part of the problem according to Pastor Anderson. I know Pastor Anderson, not personally, but I know him because he’s the carbon copy of all the pastors, assistant pastors, AND school teachers at the church and school […]

Go to THIS Chicago church for your chance at $1000!!

My guess is that Jesus hasn’t visited this church…. the pews are still sitting upright. Who knew that the Price is Right theme song could be a worship song? Found at Christian Nightmares!

Calvinists everywhere can breathe a HUGE sigh of relief…

They do serve beer in Heaven… Of course, you will have to share it with the Arminians…

Glenn Beck & Jerry Falwell Jr. unite against ‘social justice’

Watch the latest news video at In addition to hating on social justice, Falwell Jr. tells Beck that his commencement speech at Liberty University was the best that Liberty had ever experienced. Really Jerry? Glenn Beck was the BEST? […]

VIDEO: Song about Heaven causes man to jump headfirst into baptistry

Sent to me by Brent!

Oh, North Point Media, have any creative ideas of your own?

Remember this post? Basically, in that post, I included THIS hilarious and creative video… And then I suggested that… Somewhere there’s creative church person watching this trailer and wondering how they might be able to use it during an upcoming […]

Christians have the best…

Those “secular people” are so funny. But it’s true; we do have good sects.

FYI: Joel Osteen’s Saturday night church service won’t give you AIDS, says member!

When asked, “What are guys like you doing at church on a Saturday night?” one man answers, “You don’t get AIDS here.” Oh, and you can hear a clip of Joel’s sermon, which I think is the only sermon he […]

A Christian mom who raps for Jesus

Though a lot of people have viewed this video, I hadn’t seen it before today. Like my friend said, “This lady drops it like its hot but then puts on an oven mitt and picks it all back up.” One […]

The theology of hair? (yep, hair has a theology!)

One of my new favorite blogs is Stuff Fundies Like, which is where I found the above video. Does your hair have a theology? This video is hilarious.

When your pastor preaches bullsh*t

“You gonna die when God tell you to die,” says the preacher in the above clip. That’s an exact quote. And then he proceeds to tell the female members of his congregation to stop worrying about the lumps in their […]

‘Touchdown Jesus’ to receive a power wash

For those of you not familiar with “Touchdown Jesus,” you’ve obviously not driven up Interstate 75 through Ohio! Because if you had driven on I-75 outside of Cincinnati, you would have certainly witnessed the majesty and monstrosity of Solid Rock […]

Proof that the Lord’s Supper happened at my church! (@pwilson, is it true?)

This is what a joygasm looks like. I hear Lady Gaga. Sent to me by Kai!

Church sign reveals one requirement: pants

Any guess on what happened the Sunday before? Found at Pharisee Killer

Florida church adds 4th service for Easter, parodies ‘NSYNC to promote… ugh

This physically hurts me. Found at Christian Nightmares.

CONFESSION: My trouble with ‘studying God’

According to, the word “theology” means, the field of study and analysis that treats of God and of God’s attributes and relations to the universe; study of divine things or religious truth; divinity. My friend Adam, a pastor in […]

33-year-old Zac Smith is dying (and hopeful)

The Story of Zac Smith from NewSpring Media on Vimeo. Wow. So sad. A beautiful story. And a beautiful hope.

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posted 9:19:00am Apr. 29, 2016 | read full post »

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posted 8:35:00am Apr. 28, 2016 | read full post »

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posted 2:25:00pm Apr. 23, 2016 | read full post »

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posted 8:34:00am Apr. 19, 2016 | read full post »

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posted 8:25:00pm Apr. 14, 2016 | read full post »


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