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WHAT THE? A show called ‘Good Christian Bitches’ is coming to ABC

What in the world? A show called Good Christian Bitches is coming to ABC according to this report

After a fierce bidding war, ABC has acquired a Darren Star-produced series based on the Kim Gatlin novel Good Christian Bitches—but it won’t be called that, of course, even though we would definitely at least DVR it if it were, just to say thanks. The show is described as “Desperate Housewives in Dallas,” which may as well be the title: It’s about an affluent, recently divorced mother of two who relocates to a ritzy Dallas neighborhood and forthwith meets some bitches, who say bitchy things to each other in between doing stereotypical bitch things like bitching out the help and getting Botox on their bitch faces. It’s brought to you by Star, who previously created the teen bitch-fest Beverly Hills, 90210, then wrote bitchy words for the ladies of Sex And The City, and most recently created the bitchy career woman dramedy Cashmere Mafia, which was itself sort of a bitch-ass version of Desperate Housewives. But yeah, don’t expect to see the words “Christian” and “Bitches” within two blocks of each other on Disney-owned ABC, lest it be accused of participating in this ongoing war on Christians. (Though there will be bitching regardless.)

The book that the show is based upon was released in 2008. It’s back-cover copy says this…

Good Christian Bitches is the devilishly fun, yet strikingly honest, tale of Amanda Vaughn, a recently divorced mother of two. To get a fresh start, she moves back to the affluent Dallas neighborhood where she grew up. In an Alfred Hitchcock Presents, Desperate Housewives on steroids style, her old friends are already out to destroy her reputation.

In the whirling midst of salacious gossip, Botox, and fraud, Amanda turns to those who love her and the faith she’s always known. Will the Good Christian Bitches get the best of her, or will everyone see that these GCBs are as counterfeit as their travel jewelry?

AND it features THIS cover…

I guess some things really are bigger in Texas.

Sheesh.



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Comments read comments(27)
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ed cyzewski

posted September 22, 2010 at 11:46 am


You mean the cross, right?



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J Adams

posted September 22, 2010 at 11:47 am


Wow, that’s crazy…doesn’t really shock me tho…#TheWorldWeLiveIn



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Tracy Fitzgerald

posted September 22, 2010 at 11:47 am


As far as “the world’ is concerned, Christianity is DEAD! Long live Jesus Christ!



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Mary

posted September 22, 2010 at 11:54 am


Can we nominate people for this show?



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    Matthew Paul Turner

    posted September 22, 2010 at 11:55 am


    My favorite comment so far today! :) I could think of a few…. haha



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    Andie Redwine

    posted September 22, 2010 at 11:58 am


    Mary:

    You just made me laugh out loud. (raises glass)

    Andie



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    Silica

    posted September 22, 2010 at 1:59 pm


    Mary FTW. :)

    (As soon as I read the description a few people, almost unbidden, came to mind…)



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    Joe Crenshaw

    posted September 23, 2010 at 5:32 am


    Yep, Victoria Osteen and Carrie Prejean would be perfect for this show.

    I name names .. I ain’t scared.



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      Joe Crenshaw

      posted September 23, 2010 at 5:33 am


      After that awful Beckianity column I may add Rachel Held Evans as well. We need political balance.

      Much love to REH though!



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Sandy Sandmeyer

posted September 22, 2010 at 12:19 pm


I personally dislike this kind of program and won’t even watch the commercials for it. Shameful programming.



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Wes

posted September 22, 2010 at 12:27 pm


Is this a spinoff of the Mark Driscoll sermon “Become a Good Christian, Bitches!” ?



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    Matt

    posted September 22, 2010 at 1:44 pm


    Wow, funny stuff, Wes. I could hear him saying that.



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Justin McRoberts

posted September 22, 2010 at 12:45 pm


I like it better when it was a movie called “Saved.” *cough… cough.. someonedidthisalready.. cough



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Brad

posted September 22, 2010 at 12:49 pm


When are we as Christians going to take a stand and quit allowing this sort of paganism? In the Old Testament Christians regularly fought for things said and done against God. Why have we become so accepting for this type of language and behavior. If this writer and/or producer had done this with the Muslim faith there would be riots, protests, book burnings, etc. Of course there are proper and improper ways to protest and make ones voice heard, however, we as Christians are simply keeping quiet about the whole thing.



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    Matthew Paul Turner

    posted September 22, 2010 at 1:45 pm


    There were Christians in the Old Testament?



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      Melody

      posted September 22, 2010 at 9:52 pm


      Of course, mpt, don’t you remember?? Christianity began in Genesis, as everyone knows! ;)



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    John

    posted September 22, 2010 at 3:58 pm


    Of course there were Christians in the Old Testament!

    And God lives on a distant planet.

    And people with dark skin were cursed by God for their rebellion with Lucifer.

    And the Native Americans (who were originally Caucasian) are the lost tribe of Israel.

    Makes perfect sense.

    And the last time I saw anything about book burnings, some Christian ass had decided to burn the Qu’ran, not the other way around.

    But other than the completely stupid parts of that comment, it all makes perfect sense.



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    RobM

    posted September 22, 2010 at 7:11 pm


    Those great old testament Christians! I remember fondly the writings of the apostles Isaiah and Moses!



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Mark

posted September 22, 2010 at 1:23 pm


I went to a fundie high school and met my fair share of good Christian bitches. Take the general arrogance that is a natural byproduct of religious fundamentalism, (they’re right and anyone who disagrees with them is either stupid or evil), then add the arrogance that sometimes comes from attractive people as well as the rich and one can end up being a good Christian bitch.
My good fundie high school produced a click of girls as mean as the click in the movie “Heathers.”

Maybe they can cast Ann Coulter as the lead.



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    Phil

    posted September 22, 2010 at 2:07 pm


    Is it true, what they say about Rainbow Parties with Purity Clubs over there? Sorry got side tracked – and yes, a good friend living in the U.S said EVERYTHING is bigger in Texas.



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Troy

posted September 22, 2010 at 1:30 pm


Yeah it kind of sounds like a reality show…

I’m already writing an episode in my head where Amanda gifts one of the GCB’s the wrong translation of the Bible…



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RockingReverend

posted September 22, 2010 at 2:12 pm


I have mixed feelings on this one. On the one hand, I have lived most of my life in Dallas, Texas, and I love Big D. I hate to see Dallas raked through the coals, along with the Christain faith, which I also love, dispite it’s short falls. On the other hand, they have both left the door wide open for ridicule.



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Mare

posted September 22, 2010 at 2:13 pm


Yay Dallas. I thought for a second this was a reality series about certain private christian high schools in Dallas suburbia. Alas.



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Joe Crenshaw

posted September 22, 2010 at 4:33 pm


It could be “Dallas” it could be “Nashville” it could be “Atlanta” any area with a large “christian” population and with a lot of cliquish rich people.

Of course you cant’ do “Good Muslim B))))” because then a fatwa would be declared against you!!!

I also have never seen a crucifix look so happy until the cover of that book.

Let’s be honest, the show is a christian bash, a conservative christian bash and a white person bash.

Typical of the crap that anti Christian liberals are making in the media.

GOD will have the last laugh.



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    Troy

    posted September 23, 2010 at 9:38 am


    is it really a christian bash? or well-devised satire of the ridiculously ironic christian subculture that we’ve created.

    we say we believe one thing and that we aspire to certain values and then our lives demonstrate an entirely different set of values.

    that’s the real sadness about a show/book like this… not that it is being written or produced, but how true it rings.

    if we should be taking a stand against anything, it shouldn’t be the world behaving worldly, but rather our churches that enable bitchiness (or greed or judgement or self-righteousness or pride) in their members.



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      Joe Crenshaw

      posted September 23, 2010 at 12:10 pm


      Yeah, but I hate to say it that is not a majority of Christians I know. Most Christians I know are not like the idiots in “Saved” or alluded to in this book or upcoming TV show.

      Again, it’s a Christian Bash. I live near Dearborn, Michigan and I can tell you that there are plenty of Muslims full of crap as well.

      Maybe that show or book idea if I pitched it to ABC will be accepted?

      It is popular in the media to bash folks who are bible believing Christians, (bible non believing Christians or clowns like Mark Wahlberg are applauded by the media) and Whites especially white Southern Christians are fair game.

      Look at Tim Tebow, he’s everything the liberals hate, white, male, strong, good looking, bible believing Christian and Southern.

      I am sorry of I am going off on a tangent here but we need to call things as they are.

      I want Islam to start getting more on the chin.

      Time for Islam to get theirs, “The life of Mohammed anyone?”

      Always look in the bright side of Jihad
      Always look on the bright side of Jihad
      The bright side of Jihad!!

      :) Just venting sorry folks . .



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