Jesus Needs New PR

Jesus Needs New PR

ATTN. ALL SINGLE LADIES: 2010’s Christian Single of the Year goes to…

TIM TEBOW, that’s who! The honor was bestowed upon Tebow by the Christian website Christian Partner For Life.

And it makes perfect sense… he is God’s football player…

He blocks the Son sun out of his eyes with Bible verses.


He recent got a monk haircut.

And he's spiritually gifted with biceps, triceps, and pecs.

So… ladies… what do you think? Any better choice?

Found at Christian Nightmares.

Comments read comments(39)
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Rachel H. Evans

posted August 27, 2010 at 9:19 am


Two words: Roll. Tide.

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    Joe Crenshaw

    posted August 27, 2010 at 10:01 am


    Bama is a four letter word. WARRRRRRRRRRRRR EAGLE HEY!! Go Tigers!!

    (2-0 against Tebow).

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    Greg Woods

    posted August 27, 2010 at 11:39 am

    That settles it. Rachel Evans is smothered in awesomeness! ROLL TIDE!

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posted August 27, 2010 at 9:24 am

Since I’m already going to hell, I don’t mind telling you how much I can’t stand Tebow, and I will buy the jersey of the first NFL defensive lineman who drops him like a bad habit.

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posted August 27, 2010 at 9:25 am

What the what?!

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posted August 27, 2010 at 9:30 am

Ok, so the monk hair cut and the bible verses on his face is a little weird, but all that aside, he is very good looking football player.

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    Matthew Paul Turner

    posted August 27, 2010 at 9:32 am

    True. Wasn’t trying to take away from his talent and good looks.

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      Emily M.

      posted August 27, 2010 at 2:58 pm

      …you think that is good looking?

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        posted August 28, 2010 at 6:22 pm

        Daniel Carter, All Blacks, New Zealand – google that. Yes..Im a guy…yes I’m linking you to a rugby player so to make sure everyone knows I’m straight. Isla Fisher would be my celebrity card.

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posted August 27, 2010 at 9:37 am

I have many problems with Tim Tebow, of which the least important are that he’s a horribly overrated QB, I’m a UT grad, stauch Vol fan and proud Gator Hater.

That being said, I get a lot of flack from some of my Christian friends for bashing this guy. Most of it is all in fun being that I HATE FLORIDA. (Did I mention I’m not a fan?) But in all seriousness, I’ve heard before that I should give this guy a break because he lives his life for Christ and I should be ashamed of myself, as a Christian, for not liking him. Well, I’m sorry, but I don’t believe that ANYONE, Christian or not, should be put up on such a high pedestal. The only thing they can do from there is fall. (Um, can we say Tiger Woods?)

Is it his fault all the media attention he gets? Maybe not, but he has never done or said anything to show that he doesn’t love it. He’s not humble. He soaks it up and basks in it. A big-headed, ego-driven football player isn’t my idea of a good Christian example. But maybe that’s just me.

Oh, and he’s a crybaby. :)

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    Joe Crenshaw

    posted August 27, 2010 at 10:08 am

    Wow, how dare Tebow live according to the gospel, not be ashamed of his faith, preach to people around the world, help the poor, preach and help folks in prison, and feed the hungry.

    How dare Tim Tebow do all the things that everyone complains that christians don’t do enough.

    That’s sad when christians bash one of their own who actually lives according to the gospel and who actually helps people really helps people in poverty not only around the world but in America and actually try to live according to the doctrine while doing it.

    Come on, the real reasons many folks hate Tebow is jealousy, plain and simple.

    He’s doing many things for the LORD and for his fellow man like many of you are.

    I agree he will struggle in the NFL and he’s over adored by the media but so is Brett Favre, so was Tiger Woods before his whoredoms took him out, but I guess it’s cool since Favre don’t talk about no Jesus and Tiger is a Bootyist and Buddhist?


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      posted August 27, 2010 at 10:20 am

      You said “whoredoms”

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      Matthew Paul Turner

      posted August 27, 2010 at 10:28 am


      I’m not judging Tim. This is supposed to be a fun post. Don’t turn it into something it’s not.

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    posted August 27, 2010 at 5:24 pm

    haven’t seen any of this that you talk about (except maybe they crybaby part, but he did back that up with a lot of wins). Proof?

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      Katie Beth

      posted August 28, 2010 at 8:03 pm

      You can Wikipedia some of it, but I personally used to be a student at UF, and one of my friends from church went with him on several trips to prisons to minister to inmates. Also, his parents were missionaries and own an orphanage in the Philippines, where he’s spent a good deal of time. In addition, he did this super cool thing where there was a mentally handicapped girl who, more than anything, wanted Tebow to go to prom with her, and he did it. I don’t have any proof or citations for his feeding the hungry or helping the poor otherwise, but I feel like I can trust that he does those things. I’m sure that not everything he has ever done has been publicized.


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posted August 27, 2010 at 9:39 am

Nonono…. I don’t care if he’s from Florida. Jocks are overrated. Even Christian jocks.

Also: Go Knights! (wait. Nobody cares about UCF. :P)

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    Joe Crenshaw

    posted August 27, 2010 at 10:09 am

    I grew up in Seminole County and my sister went to UCF. Wife hopes to attend there in the future.

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    posted August 27, 2010 at 10:36 am

    Jen I agree- GO KNIGHTS!!!

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Blake Porter

posted August 27, 2010 at 10:15 am

Has Kim Kardahsian met him yet!!! AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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    Joe Crenshaw

    posted August 27, 2010 at 3:48 pm

    I don’t think Kim and Tebow will get along as she likes the camera time more than he does (ba bump!) :)

    Tim and Kim actually stayed in an NYC hotel next to each other during the Heisman trophy awards last fall.

    Tim heard Kim in the middle of the night saying, “Oh God, Oh my god!” Tim woke up and knocked on the door and asked if she needed help praying. She told him to go back to bed.


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posted August 27, 2010 at 10:29 am

I think he needs a training bra.

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posted August 27, 2010 at 10:34 am

Why doesn’t he use Matt 11:12, is he too young?

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Charlie's Church of Christ

posted August 27, 2010 at 11:11 am

such an epic (and so American) photo of him standing in front of the cross holding a football.

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posted August 27, 2010 at 11:41 am

I don’t get the monk haircut. That’s just weird. I mean… if you’re hot under that helmet… why not just cut your hair really short or shave your head? What exactly does one do with an inch and a half of hair around your perimeter?

That said, his doing that has made me wonder about the “monk haircut” in general. If the catholics hated the Jews so much, why did their monks cut their hair in such a way as to make it look like they were wearing yarmulkes? I’m off to do some research.

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    posted August 27, 2010 at 2:49 pm

    Bishops wear them, too. They’re called something else, I think, but there are Catholic clergy that wear them.

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    posted August 27, 2010 at 5:25 pm

    hope your jokingly ignorant here. You realize that was a hazing incident perpetrated by fellow broncos.

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    posted August 28, 2010 at 7:08 am

    They’re called a tonsure.

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posted August 27, 2010 at 12:26 pm


can you post a shirtless picture before i decide?


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posted August 27, 2010 at 12:29 pm

James, the monk haircut was part of his rookie hazing with the Broncos. I quite like it. 😉

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Jim Sanders

posted August 27, 2010 at 2:03 pm

Well, as far as Jesus-loving quarterbacks go, Kurt Warner is still the man!

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posted August 27, 2010 at 2:52 pm

He’s a safety, but I love Troy Polamalu. (I’m also from Pittsburgh, what can I say?) But he’s not single. He and his wife are actually expecting their second child now. :) I am seriously inspired by him. Professional football seems to encourage a certain kind of thuggery in people (players and fans), and Troy just lives by his faith every day.

Plus he has absolutely gorgeous hair.

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Ashley Blair

posted August 27, 2010 at 3:03 pm

Jesus-loving hot college quarterback? Don’t mind if I do 😉

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Carrie Young

posted August 27, 2010 at 8:23 pm

I don’t think he can be considered a real Christian. He didn’t go to Baylor. :)

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posted August 27, 2010 at 8:30 pm

It’s funny that people will hate on Tebow for being in the limelight, and claiming Christ, while at the same time we elevate our pastors to superstar status. I mean he was a great college QB, of course the cameras are going to be on him, and why would he not want to use that to talk about Jesus? But I will admit, the football & crosses picture is ridiculous, I can’t stand the cheesy stuff…it looks like it would be hanging front & center in a Lifeway store.

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posted August 27, 2010 at 8:46 pm

I’m just saying that it would never work between me and this guy because I’m not into sports AT ALL, especially football. Plus, the monk hair cut’s just got to go.

I mean, I only come on JESUS NEEDS NEW PR to screen potential spouses and this hasn’t helped me at all, MPT. :)

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Motorcycle guy

posted August 29, 2010 at 2:37 pm

Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn’t mean the circus has left town.

Sent via Blackberry

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posted October 5, 2010 at 8:52 am

God is love,and only who are humble to the commandment of God,will have the fulfillment of command agape,its natural,it can not be but with money or Gold,but i can be impacted…………..shallom

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