Jesus Creed

Jesus Creed

I Had a Colleague who said these things

posted by xscot mcknight

A former colleague of mine, whose name shall go unmentioned here, was notorious for off-the-wall comments in class. (Suggested names will be permitted, and if enough get it right I’ll disclose the person’s name). One student of his decided to begin recording them. She gave them to me, and I’ll give you some of them here.

“Who’s been to Broadway where all the sin is?”
“You have to read this on your knees before God.”
“There’s only one book in this class and it is not the Bible.”
“Has anyone forgotten that I’m the teacher?”
“I don’t really cry, because I’m the macho man.”
“The question is, Should good Christian women dress like Brittany Spears? I don’t want to see any belly buttons in this class.”
“Any teacher worth his salt should be crucified.”
“I should give more As, then God would reward me.”
“Will someone please call me Mr. North Park please?”
“I want to use university words, so you can go back and use them and inflict them on your parents.”
“Let’s talk about how ignorant we are.”
“I like the way I said that! I’m in love with that.”
“What am I now talking about?”
“The first time I ever tasted Snapple was like tasting pleasure for the first time.”
“Can you imagine anyone more intoxicated than me? I’m intoxicated with truth.”
“I’m in love with my ideas.”
“Will you crucify me if I call you adolescents?”
“Every time you think bad of me as a teacher you get black marks on your soul.”
“I can identify with that … I can’t tear myself away from the mirror, that marvelous vision.”
“You usually don’t learn things in my class.”
“Heaven will be like the greatest Frat party you’ve ever been to.”

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posted September 1, 2005 at 12:03 am

Umm…. Dave Nystrom? I never even met him, but he’s the only former North Park colleague I know of.
I visited your new blog, are you happy? Post some thoughts on the New Monasticism article if you read it, I would love hear them. Peace…

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posted September 1, 2005 at 7:02 am

These are hiliarious! I wish I would have taped stuff that my prof’s said back in Bible College (Toccoa Falls) – might be some good blackmail stuff by now:)

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Scot McKnight

posted September 1, 2005 at 8:26 am

Never was this David Nystrom.

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Kerry Doyal

posted September 1, 2005 at 9:04 am

This is not autobiographical, is it?

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posted September 1, 2005 at 11:05 am

i could get an entire sermon series out of those lines, lol…as for who said them, i’ll be quiet…shhhh! LOL

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Scot McKnight

posted September 1, 2005 at 12:59 pm

Not I friend.

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David Reeves

posted September 1, 2005 at 9:09 pm

Those comments have to have originated from none other than Perry Downs! :)

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Scot McKnight

posted September 2, 2005 at 12:24 pm

Not Perry Downs either.

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posted September 3, 2005 at 5:35 pm

Dr. Jim Nelson.

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Scot McKnight

posted September 4, 2005 at 10:36 pm

Jinny, You got it. Can you believe these comments?

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posted September 6, 2005 at 9:29 pm

Um…yes. Did you edit out the golfing comments on purpose? :)
Even though I never had him in class, from the few times I saw him a BTS colloquiums and some of the descriptions I heard from a roommate, I can honestly say, “I’m not surprised.” LOL. ^_^

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