YouTube is an incredible resource. So many spiritual teachers, so many topics, there’s not time enough to watch it all and hear and learn. I was listening to a video the other day and I’ll tell you what I took away from it. I took away “I don’t know.” As a precise point of spiritual wisdom. To get to that point of “I don’t know.” That’s the exhale. Can you? Do you? It may take a reduction of your caffeine intake or the pack on your back of your monkey mind.
I am reminding myself of this “I don’t know” throughout the days lately. Perhaps not the usual affirmation. The usual affirmation may say: I’m getting better and better in every way. The usual affirmation may say: my income is increasing! The usual affirmation may say: I am love.
But let me tell you, my friends, I am finding much… affirming in my “I don’t know.” Oh, this problem? I don’t know. Oh, this OTHER problem, I don’t know. And this one, over here? No clue. How I get out of this mess is anyone’s guess. We want solutions so bad. We want an end to our suffering SO BAD. We want a good kiss. We want cake without calories. We want eternal life (well, I don’t. But some do).
And I think this is why, in part, people consult people like me — a Tarot Reader/Astrologer/Mentor — to help soften the blow of the “I don’t know.” But what if. What if you made that your meditation this week. What if you made that your anxiety medication this week. Allowing for the question, the question mark, not just the periods and exclamations and semi-colons of this world. No clue. No freaking clue.
You know, I actually do pull a card at random for this blog. Once in a while I don’t like it and pick again until it feels right, but usually I go with the flow. And I today’s card oh yes corresponds to what I’m talking about here. And how Saturn leaving Scorpio and entering Sagittarius (later this month, a major shift) will be a crash course in I DON’T KNOW.
The Sagittarius doesn’t need a map. He or she sets out. Doesn’t care about getting lost. She’ll find her way back home — or somewhere — eventually. One foot. Another foot. One foot. Another foot. Faster. Faster. Faster. Until the gallop. They start their adventures without knowing how it will end. Saturn in Sagittarius will be lesson after lesson in this kind of thinking i.e. how to MOVE FORWARD anyway. You know what this is? Faith.
Today’s Tarot is the Nine of Swords, inverted. Oh how I love the Connolly deck! Even the Nine of Swords woman looks strong and she IS strong. Yes she’s got a pack of swords on her back, sharp beautiful weapons. She’s carrying them. She can cut you anytime. She’s not being stabbed in the night with nightmares like in the Rider Waite (not that I don’t give kavod to the Rider Waite). She’s carrying all this pain, she’s bearing it, it’s snowing. There’s a sword in the snow at her left boot. Did she stick it there? Why? Is this a message for us? One sword dropped, leaving eight, she’s alone in the grey world, but we don’t worry for her. Her face is calm. Woman. In the snow. With Weapons. We know she’s been at it a long time now. It’s one more step until the Ten of Swords which I think is death in the Connolly deck, physical or metaphysical, but that’s a card for another time.
But I pulled this card reversed, didn’t I? All the Swords fall to the sky. She can let the pain go now. No need to cut or kill or die. Can you imagine a time of no more nightmares? Is it only your perspective that needs shifting? Trust me on this. Invoke the almighty “I don’t know” and your Swords return to sender. They were only thoughts anyway.
Wishing you good cards xx