Last Tuesday’s blog sparked some interesting responses. I wrote on the importance of taking life one day at a time. Don’t fear about tomorrow and try to live in today. A woman wrote:
My husband was killed in a small plane crash. I had worried ever since he got his license and I tried to tell myself he was a good and safe pilot. It’s impossible for me to encourage people not to worry about what could happen now. How do I say to my friend whose husband rides a motorcycle, “Don’t worry. Everything will be fine.” I am limping through the rest of my life, facing each day with a fear of something really awful happening again.
When tragedy strikes, it can rob your sense of hope. It tampers with your ability to believe in the best that life can offer. How can you be optimistic when you know the worst case scenario not only can happen but already has?
First, you have to deal with the grief and this can take a long time. Loss is a powerful event that can’t be swept under the rug. It’s important to talk to someone to sort out your feelings: a friend, support group, counselor, therapist, perhaps even your doctor. There are people out there who can help you through this process. You don’t have to go it alone.
Eventually, you’ll find your way back to happiness again. Whatever happened to you will no longer hold you prisoner, and the fear won’t compare to the freedom you feel to enjoy life to its fullest.
I don’t think we ever really get over a crisis or “move on”. Instead, we grow. We take all we’ve learned and continue growing. Trusting in the goodness of life is part of that. Instead of dreading the next calamity, we hope for impending joy. I know it’s difficult, but I also know it’s possible. I’ve seen it happen.
We just posted a great gallery on dealing with grief over the weekend. I hope it inspires you.
“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.” – Maya Angelou