I’ve had maybe one Valentine my whole life, so naturally I’ve had an odd relationship with this holiday. Some years, I tolerated it. Other years I ignored it altogether. And then there were those college years when I loathed it… like the “Grinch Who Stole Valentine’s Day”.

However, within the last few years, I’ve decided to embrace it. Yes, it’s a day for romantic love, but it could mean so much more.

For me, Valentine’s Day is when I make my boldest moves of the year. It’s the day I decide to leap. For example, last year, I vowed to stop straightening my hair and, for the first time since birth, let my curls go wild and free. This year, I’m moving into my dream downtown apartment. It’s all about showing yourself the grandest display of love and affirmation that you can do all year long. At least, that’s how I see it.

If love and romance haven’t treated you right, may I suggest a new approach? Do something grand for yourself this year. I’m not talking about sending yourself flowers or going to a nice dinner. I mean, go big! At the very least, you’ll remember Valentine’s Day for more than watching romantic comedies in your pajamas.

So, think about it. What’s the thing you’ve been holding off on doing? Where’s the place you’ve always wanted to go? Is this the year to go back to school? Start your own business? Make it happen on Valentine’s Day. What a great way to show yourself some love.

Read the follow-up on Loss and Loneliness on Valentine’s Day