How Great Thou Part

How Great Thou Part


Do You Know a Friend Who Needs a Mirror of Love?

posted by corme

This past November, I sat outside with the slight chill of early winter rushing through the air. There were six of us, old friends noshing on food and filling up with laughter.

A few weeks later, I pull my car alongside my mailbox, pull the door down and snatch the mail. I spy a handwritten card. I tear at the white envelope.

I read the words aloud. They are from my friend. I will call her “Belle.”

“Colleen, you have a rare spirit that lights up the lives of many, draw on that strength and light up your own life.”

I am typically self-deprecating, yet I read the words brazenly to a few that are close to me. As if to say, “look, she still recognizes me.”

I am not really the woman who is blatantly disappearing from her youth. That young girl, is not completely gone, I am just getting tossed around again and again because I have lost myself in life and love.

Like a piece of cut glass thrown into the ocean. The games of marriage and divorce keep pulling me down and thrashing me around as I try to make my way to shore. Each time, the crisp, sharp, beautiful edges that once defined me, the very best of me, wearing down to a cloudier vision.

I have lost sight of the better part of me. Of the beautiful edges. Instead, it is easier to see the cloudier version. The one I don’t care for quite so much since the waves of relationship worries wore me down. I have always been hard on myself only now I find myself unusually hard on myself.

It is not long before I am sitting beside another friend. We are laughing and yet, I glimpse a moment where I fear that she too, is losing sight of her crisp, sharp, beautiful edges.

I am wiser this time. I am smart enough to see that the, ‘true inner beauty’ of my always gorgeous friend is in jeopardy. I know that I must grab a mirror. I need to tip it towards her reflection so that she can see what I see.

I sit to write her a letter. I tell her of all the things that make up her own, “Rare spirit that lights up the lives of many.”

I tell her that I do not want her to lose sight of who she is and, like my friend before me, I tell her to “draw on that strength and light up her own life.” I want her to know that this is not the complete journey of our loss of self that it seems to be. That we are evolving into a new and different beauty, but our glass is still the same color.

I am no longer the old me and believe me for quite some time there was no one sadder about that than me, but sea glass is made more beautiful through its beaten, ocean journey.

Then, when it seems it can be thrashed around no more, it finds its way to a new beach away from the one that cast it aside and towards someone else who recognizes its evolved beauty.

I pull my car alongside my mailbox, pull the door down and snatch the mail. I spy a handwritten card. I tear at the white envelope………….it is a thank you card for a gift. At the very bottom are a few personal words. A mirror being tipped in my direction. They tell me that this friend still recognizes the color of my glass and they still think it’s beautiful.

They aren’t looking for the ‘old’ me……What a relief because I am tired of trying to retrieve her.

On the contrary, they think my worn edges reflect my strength and that the ocean journey has polished my color.

 



Advertisement
Comments Post the First Comment »
post a comment

Comments are closed.



Previous Posts

The In-Between Days of Divorce - When Grace Meets Reality
It is getting dark and I am perched in front of my keyboard. I have been jamming through my inbox, cleaning out e-mails, doing work and research since morning. I am having one of those in-between days. There is nothing jarring, stressful or new on the divorce front - phew! Yet, not a particul

posted 12:55:35am Mar. 04, 2015 | read full post »

Are You Truly Loved?
It is late and the moon peaks out slightly from the dark sky. I toss and turn and then grab for my phone. I shouldn't leave it resting on the bedside table. A poor habit which makes it even more difficult to find sleep each night. I start typing column notes into my phone. I do this frequently si

posted 11:47:36pm Feb. 28, 2015 | read full post »

A Rare Lefty Baseball Star's Legacy of Love
I listen to the priest. He tells us we should be, "bringing Heaven down here to earth." We are in church to say goodbye to a gorgeous sixteen year old boy. A child overflowing with love and brimming with joy. He is gifted in the art of life...family, friendships, spirituality and grace. He is als

posted 10:14:34pm Feb. 27, 2015 | read full post »

Some of the Bravest Women I Know
I swing open the door of the local coffee shop. I cross the threshold and spy two friends. I stop and chat with them for a moment. They are aware of my marital struggles. What can I say? The writer in me has for lack of a better term always made my life an open book. These are two of the kindest

posted 6:36:44pm Feb. 25, 2015 | read full post »

The 5 Keys to Emotional Success
In life whether it be the glorious peaks or the darkest valley the true essence of enjoying the highs or evolving through the lows resides in our core being. Who are we? What are we made of? Is our foundation so strong that we are humble through success and gracious in defeat? In our most weathe

posted 3:11:08pm Feb. 18, 2015 | read full post »




Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.