Tired of dating blind?
Many people dread the dating game or at least certain aspects of it.
What do you go through when it comes to dating?
Is it a good or positive experience?
How do you feel about talking with someone that you want to go out with?
What are your thoughts, words and actions?
How successful are your interactions, communications and results?
Here is dating wisdom that works from my friends, Ariel & Shya Kane.
The Kanes have been working with individuals, couples and teams for over twenty five years.
They also have a long-term relationship and marriage, so they qualify as “experts” in the dating game.
Most important – people around them tend to develop good relationships and marriages!
When I first met Ariel & Shya back in 1987, I was in a rocky marriage, soon to be separated and then divorced. I could not believe this was happening to me. How do you think I felt about getting back out there and dating? Forget about it! I was in one of their seminars when Ariel started talking about dating and relationships. She said, “Why don’t you just go out on a date and have fun…..just be with the person and enjoy it. Instead of trying to figure out what to say or do or how to be, or worrying about how you are doing or if this person likes you, is right for you….or the one…..just have fun. Then Ariel said the magic words…..don’t make it mean anything about you or them, just have fun….you don’t have to get married or start a committed relationship…it’s just a date.”
This information was incredible for me. I had never heard anyone recommend this. After all, how many times have you liked someone or been out on a date with them and your mind is racing into the future and telling you what is going to happen or judging if this person is the one you will spend your whole life with, etc. The mind plays all kinds of tricks and many people find themselves off into the future trying to figure out what is going to happen before it even arrives. The result is that the present moment is usually lost. Also, your mind can go back to the past and dig up old experiences where you “crashed and burned.” Either way, you are not present in the moment when you are thinking about the past or future because you cannot be in two places at once.
Really take a look at this. What is it that you want? Don’t you want someone to be there and actually listen to you while they are sharing themselves with you? How rare is it when you truly feel heard or listened to? Ariel & Shya suggest that you pay attention to the speaker from their point of view. That you listen with your eyes and hear the tone of the person’s voice, feel what you are feeling and take in the moment fully. This is so powerful because you become fully engaged in the moment, present and totally alive. It is amazing the things that can result from such energy and communication. You may actually discover yourself and the person you are with. This is the space where magic happens!
Now success leaves clues so I used this information consistently to practice and I experienced lots of good results. A lot of my fears starting disappearing in regards to asking someone out on a date, the date itself and so did a lot of my nervousness. I stopped trying to do it right. I started feeling more comfortable being with the person I was with and let go of focusing on what I was saying or doing. This empowered me to be myself and be free…..what a concept! My entire experience of dating changed, actually transformed and so did my results. I was having more fun, getting to know the person I was with and even having better safe sex. I started liking myself more too.
Over the years this helped me in all of my dating experiences, and the communication skills helped me in all of my relationships both personal and business. Everyone wants to be heard and listened to and I continue to perfectly practice this communication wisdom to this day. The results are a wonderful, happy 16 relationship and marriage with the love of my life, Denise. By the way, another recommendation from the Kanes is to make a game of it and have fun with little dates. So yesterday Denise and I had a date. We took a tasty picnic lunch down to Little Corona Del Mar Beach and played in the ocean together and spent a glorious day enjoying each other and our love. How do you think our evening went after such a wonderful day together? Lots more joy and intimacy.
All of this information and much more is available in Ariel & Shya’s new book, “How to Have A Match Made in Heaven.” It is coming out on September 4th and there is a special promotion that offers $400 in additional value, Go to http://www.matchmadeinheavenbook.com/bookpromo/
Don’t miss this opportunity to have what you really want in relationships!
The MEGA Coach