Very funny Christian writer Matthew Paul Turner did a post this week on his blog, Jesus Needs New PR, in which he asks readers to finish the phrase, “You might be a Christian rock star if …”
His suggestions range from “.. if during the middle of massive applause you’ve ever taken a step back from the microphone and then pointed toward ceiling (Extra credit if you join in the applause!)” to “… if you’ve ever played at an event that had the word ‘Republican’ in its name (Extra credit if you sent out a press release!)”
Spot on, Matthew!
Let’s twist the joke around and ask: You might be a Christian music fan if …
OK, I’ll start!


You might be a Christian music fan if …
… your knowledge of Christian music is limited only to the 10 artists played on your local Christian radio station.
… you burned all of your Ray Boltz CDs when you heard he came out of the closet.
… you didn’t let your kids listen to the Jonas Brothers, until you found out they were Christians – but you did let your kids listen to David Archuleta, until you found out he was Mormon. [If you didn’t get this one, here’s an explanation of the joke.]
… you cried when the American Idol contestants sang “Shout To The Lord” on national television.
… you’ll go see Third Day play at a mega-church but won’t go see them at your local concert arena.

I thought of a few more:
… you’re still not over Amy Grant’s divorce.
… you’d never go see U2 in concert but you’ve been to a U2charist.
… you thought Third Day sold out when their tour was sponsored by Chevy.
… you preset all of your radio buttons to Christian stations before you leave your car with your mechanic.
OK, your turn! Fill in the blank. What are some of the Christian music stereotypes you’ve noticed?
Remember, it’s OK to laugh at ourselves once in a while. In fact, I think it’s the 11th commandment … Thou shalt not take thyselves too seriously … and honest, I’m poking fun at myself here, too (although I’ve never owned a Ray Boltz CD, but if I did I wouldn’t burn it). There’s a reason that outsiders look at Christian music and scratch their heads in puzzlement. We do weird, contradictory stuff sometimes.
And head over to Matthew Paul Turner’s blog. He’s funny and has a great take on the whole Christian community bubble.
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